


Making The Distance

by ifangirloverthese



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Boys' Love, BoyxBoy, M/M, Showjumping AU, Yaoi, Yaoi on Ice, Yuri on Ice - Freeform, equestrian AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-16
Updated: 2017-07-30
Packaged: 2018-09-24 23:00:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 68,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9790934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ifangirloverthese/pseuds/ifangirloverthese
Summary: Victuri Showjumping AUAfter losing his heart horse, Yuuri Katsuki is determined never to compete again. When reknowned international showjumper announces his desire to coach this lost soul, passion is reignited and Yuuri learns that maybe he doesn't have his heart horse anymore, but he may have found his heart human.





	1. Chapter 1

Yuuri tightened his grip on the reins and sat deeper in the saddle, feeling Vicchan collect underneath him and shorten his strides. He could sense his nervous energy, but then this was to be expected in such a large stadium. The pair had grown exponentially in talent together, taking the competition world by- well, not by storm, more of a mild raincloud. Everybody was too busy being stormed by Victor Nikiforov and his Makkachin, bred from the same stallion as Vicchan. Too late, he realised he'd lost concentration and they barely managed to scramble over the first fence, a beefy oxer with a very difficult line for a first fence.  
'Sorry,' He whispered to Vicchan, scratching his withers to better convey his apologetic message. He shortened up his reins and forced himself to not collapse in through his stomach, a habit he still hadn't quite managed to shake. He kept in mind what Celestino had told him about the double that was fast approaching, remembering his exact words.  
'Take out a stride,' He'd told him. 'Vicchan gets more hyped up when you do. You want him on his toes for this round.'  
He adopted his best determination face and put his leg on into it, Vicchan locking on and positively bouncing beneath the saddle. They took a perfect stride into it, and Yuuri made sure to sit far back and kick for the stride he wanted. Vicchan took it obediently and sped up considerably on the other side, just as expected. Yuuri checked him firmly to remind him to keep his head in the game, and as he did so Vicchan suddenly threw his head between his knees and bronced hard, something he hadn't ever done before. Shocked more than afraid, Yuuri tried to pull his head up but this only seemed to aggravate the horse more and he began to run, his long legs tearing the ground up beneath him.  
'Woah!' He cried, panicking and yanking hard at the reins, unsure what to do because Vicchan hadn't ever bolted on him up until this moment and he had no idea how to react given that he seemed to be completely out of sorts. He barely had time to pull him out of the line of a massive triple bar, and as he tried to circle to slow down, he felt Vicchan's legs go from beneath him. He stumbled for a few strides before crashing to the ground, after which Yuuri's eyesight blurred and from there he remembered nothing but terrified shouting and a horrible blackness that refused to relinquish its hold on him.


	2. Chapter 2

It had been two years since Vicchan had been put down. As it turned out, he'd had an abscess high up in his mouth where nobody could find it and this was what had caused his alarming and eventually fatal behaviour. He'd fractured his pedal bone in the fall and there had been no other choice but than to euthanise him on site. Yuuri had come away uninjured other than a mild concussion, leaving him no way to move forward and depressed without his best friend. He was wracked with guilt for not having noticed Vicchan's change in behaviour sooner and for checking him so hard. He should have been softer- he had to be softer in the future. If he had a future with horses, that was. He was taking some time off to work at his home yard in Japan, Hasetsu Castle stables, helping to bring on some of the youngsters. He'd been taking them on gentle hacks for Yuuko but hadn't jumped since the accident. There weren't many horses on the yard that could jump anyway, but what did it matter to him? He didn't want to jump anymore. Having aspirations in showjumping had cost him his all and he didn't want to go back to that and risk losing another horse.  
'Yuuri, there's somebody coming to see a horse today,' Yuuko trilled as he offloaded the crap in his wheelbarrow into the muckheap and began stepping it, wiping the sweat from his brow with a gloved hand. 'Can you ride it for me? They want to see it jump and I'm busy, but nobody's around that jumps like you can. It's really well-behaved.'  
'I'd love to, but I really-' He began, but didn't get much further before she interrupted him.  
'Great, thanks! They'll be here at ten, the horse is in stall seven and the tack's on the spare rack.'  
With that, she bustled off to track down her children and their shetlands who were always invariably up to some sort of mischief.  
Yuuri was left speechless and his mouth agape, horrified at the prospect of mounting a horse and jumping it. Two years was a long time, and he didn't even know if he could do it anymore. He checked his watch and growled to himself in irritation when he saw that it was 9:45am already. He couldn't believe Yuuko had put him on the spot like this- she knew that he couldn't stand the idea of jumping again but she was using the fact that he couldn't bear to let people down against him. He dumped the wheelbarrow in the line of them and walked down to the tack room, heaving the heavy saddle off of its peg and pulling the bridle down from its hook, having to stretch to reach it. He could barely see over the vast pile of tack in his hands as he stumbled his way down to stable seven and heaved it onto the door then unlocked it and shut it behind himself.  
'Hey, buddy,' He let the horse sniff his hand, stroking its soft nose and scratching its forehead. 'Ready for an adventure, huh?'  
He leaned outside the stable to look at the door, but could find no name or anything. The best he could do was look underneath its belly and discover that he was dealing with a mare. Great. She pulled a face as he stroked along her back and down her hindquarters, feeling where the muscle rippled as a true jumper's should. She stamped her hind leg in agitation, smacking him in the face with her tail.  
'Grumpy girl,' He stuck his tongue out at her, smiling at the way she tossed her head defiantly. 'We have a job to do.'  
He brought her out onto the yard and tied her up just in time for a nervous looking girl to walk up to him and ask where Novia was. He guessed it would be the horse being tried out and pointed at the mare dozing idly in the early spring sun, flicking her tail every now and then to dispel the flies.  
'This is she,' He patted her on the neck firmly. 'I don't really know her, because I'm only riding her for Yuuko.'  
'Yeah, we spoke to her on the phone,' The girl's mother strolled up, her dark hair scraped back into a painful looking bun and an obnoxiously sparkly pair of shades sat atop her head. She looked like a real tiger mother to Yuuri, and this was proved when she began running her hands all over the mare's body, checking for any lumps and bumps and making plenty of comments about her conformation.  
'Ma,' The girl mantled with embarrassment and went to greet Novia. 'Is it okay if I give her a treat?'  
'Uh, sure,' Yuuri nodded. 'I have to go grab my hat, do you want to tack her up?'  
'Us?' The mother asked, incredulous.  
'Well, how will you know what she's like to tack up otherwise?'  
'Madison doesn't tack up her ponies,' She rolled the words off of her tongue like they came with an unpleasant taste. Poor Novia. Yuuri had faith that if Yuuko was selling her she was a very decent horse, and he hated to see her go to a home with this woman present. Nevertheless, he left them to it and went to chuck on his hat. It was one he'd had for years and he didn't ever want to part with it, not even after the multitude of falls he'd had in it. It was scratched up and dented but he believed it told his story well. He fastened it and led Novia down to the arena, where he tightened the girth and clambered on from the mounting block. She could only have been about 15.2hh at most, and she felt weirdly narrow and the ground looked too close. As he pushed her into a dull trot, she came effortlessly onto the bridle and he barely felt a weight in his hands. This pleased him because he was scared of taking too much of a contact given what it had done to Vicchan. Yuuko finally joined them and stood to the side, talking animatedly to the girl and her mother. Once he was satisfied that Novia was warmed up, she set him up a small crosspole, patting him on the leg as he walked by.  
'Just stay calm,' She told him, and he nodded.  
'Why does he have to stay calm?' The mother instantly picked up on her words. 'Is the horse not confident?'  
'No, the rider isn't,' She jerked her head towards Yuuri, who blushed and looked down. 'He hasn't jumped in a while after a bad fall. Thankfully, I know Novia is the perfect horse to move him along. Very quiet.'  
'But still scopey, right?'  
'She'll go at just about any level. She'll pick it up a notch for your daughter, I'm sure.'  
Yuuri, bored of this idle tittle-tattle, picked up a short-strided canter and circled before lining her up to the fence. He felt his nerves make his stomach coil up, but then instinct kicked in and he managed to make it over the jump with more or less a decent position.  
'Woohoo!' Yuuko couldn't help herself from fist bumping the air excitedly. 'Yuuri Katsuki, it's time you got back in the game.'  
Her elation was contagious, and he found that his nerves fizzled out even as she whacked it up to a pretty decent height. Novia was very calm into the fence and all he had to do was sit there and allow her to find her own stride.  
'Beautiful!' Yuuko grinned.  
'Can you put it up any more? Madison wants to jump 1.20 tracks, but I want to see more potential on an individual fence,' The mother was already hiking up the jump to what had to be at least 1.40, and just like that Yuuri's nerves returned.  
'Yuuko, maybe you should...' He trailed off when he saw her face. She looked so happy to see him jumping again that he couldn't let her down. 'Yeah. Okay.'  
'Wait a second,' Madison waved at him shyly and he pulled up beside her. 'Are you the Yuuri Katsuki?'  
'Define the.'  
'The one who disappeared after his horse died?'  
'Yes, that one,' Yuuko said quietly, sending him a sympathetic look. 'Okay, how about you go jump that fence?'  
He nodded, biting his lip to hold back the tears as he thought of what had happened with Vicchan again. He quickly cantered off, unable to bear how Madison and her mother were looking at him with a combination of pity and fascination. He screwed his eyes tightly shut for a moment, taking a deep breath and wrapping his legs round the horse. It brought a surge of energy as he directed her at the fence, clinging to her mane for dear life. He knew she wouldn't stop- she was too honest a horse for that- but what if she didn't stop after the fence? What if it happened again and it was all his fault? He should never have turned such a tight circle, he should- he instinctually folded as she popped the fence with startling ease. She was a good horse. Madison was going to have a lot of fun with this one. He slowly dropped her down to a walk and halted next to them.  
'Would you like a go?' He asked Madison, and she nodded eagerly so he dismounted and handed the reins over- both literally and figuratively. As he stood and watched her trotting around, he realised how much he'd missed jumping. He wouldn't return to it, but maybe he could do this again once or twice. Yuuko certainly seemed very eager for him to do so because she was already trying to book him into every horse trying slot lined up in the next twenty years.  
'I should go get back to work,' He told her, and she squeezed his shoulder, understanding that he needed some time alone. He got like this sometimes, usually after seeing somebody jump or when he saw something that reminded him of Vicchan.  
He hurried to the stable block and up the stairs behind the tack room to the loft above, where he kept all his old trophies and pictures. He sat down on the rickety old chair and picked up one of the motheaten rugs that he'd won, pulling it around himself tightly and sniffling into it like a child. He looked up at the walls that were lined with official show photos and crappy ones printed off by his sister that she'd taken across the years. In all of them, Vicchan had his ears pinned forward and Yuuri had his 'determination face' on, aka his tongue stuck out the corner of his mouth and his eyebrows knitted together as he craned his neck to find the next fence. He stood up after a while and ran his finger along the dusty shelf, throwing up dust motes into the air and making him cough violently. He took one of the trophies into his hands, reading the inscription. It was in English, from one of his very first international shows. He'd come in first place much to everybody's surprise, not least his own. Even Celestino had asked him if he'd salted the hay of his competitors' horses. He put it back down with great care, his eyes lingering on it for a little while longer. Next he opened the cupboard in the corner, the one where his old tack sat unused as it had for two years. He took the old headcollar and ran his finger over the nameplate on the side. Vicchan PDL, it read on the brass that was in dire need of a good polish. He grabbed a rag and the metal polish from the drawer in the cupboard and began to mindlessly scrub at it, unable to see it go dull. About half an hour later, his phone began to buzz like mad. Surprisingly, it wasn't Yuuko telling him to get his butt back to work, but what appeared to be hundreds of instagram and twitter and Facebook notifications. Had something major happened? Intrigued, he unlocked it and scrolled through his Instagram feed to see that a video with him tagged had been reposted dozens, if not hundreds of times. There were also scores of retweets and shares on Facebook. He tapped on the video and waited to see what would come up. What the hell had stirred the equestrian world into such a frenzy so fast? And why on Earth was he involved? Part of him was terrified that it was something to do with Vicchan, but if so why would it have surfaced now? Unless Madison had had something to do with it... The video loaded and up popped footage of a strikingly familiar bay mare and him sat atop, cantering towards a fence. It was a video of him jumping this afternoon, and the entire showjumping community was going mad over it, predicting a comeback already, stating Novia to be his new horse.  
'What the hell?' He breathed, seeing that he'd gained almost two hundred followers on Instagram. He flew down the stairs to find Yuuko and demand to know what the hell had happened. She was already stood at the bottom of them, looking very sheepish and holding a pink iPod in her hands.  
'You've seen it huh?' She held an apologetic tone, and he wondered if it was something to do with her. 'The triplets. God, they're a nightmare. I didn't know they had so many damn followers on their little page!'  
'Everybody's seen it!' He cried in exasperation, flicking through his twitter feed again. 'Oh god. Phichit is having a field party.'  
'Him? Have you seen Victor Nikiforov?'  
'What?!?' Yuuri's eyes flew wide open. He immediately searched up Victor's name and clicked on the first one that came up. Verified, of course. He checked his recently liked and saw that he had commented on Phichit's repost of the video.  
Where is he training now? It read, and Yuuri was horrified. He couldn't believe what he was seeing.  
Hasetsu Castle stables. Where he always has. was Phichit's reply, and Yuuri groaned.  
'I am never riding a horse again,' He exclaimed grandly, turning his phone off and shoving it deep within his pocket, never to see the light of day again. 'They can all be disappointed when I don't come back. Whatever.'  
'Well, maybe you should,' Yuuko suggested, and he snorted with laughter. 'I'm serious. Victor's a pretty big name and if even he has seen this, you can be sure you'd be welcomed back grandly. People would finally notice you.'  
'I don't want to be noticed,' He grimaced. 'Can't I just stay out of the limelight?'  
'It's been two years. You need a tan from it.'  
'Yuuko, that part of my life is over,' He said a little too firmly and she backed down, throwing her hands up in mock surrender.  
'Just tell me when you're done being over with it.'


	3. Chapter 3

Yuuri woke up very late nine days later to Mari calling his name, hammering on his door and all but kicking it down. It was his day off and he didn't like to be bothered, so he didn't fight to keep the irritation from his voice.  
'What do you want?' He grumbled, stumbling to the door and opening it, stretching his arms above his head.  
'Yuuko is at the door and you need to go with her right now. She says it's really important.'  
'Fuck that,' He yawned, turning to go back to bed. 'Day off. Even if the entire yard is on fire, it's not my responsibility.'  
'Down the stairs. Now,' Mari sure was scary when she put her mind to it. He grunted and indicated that he needed to get dressed, which she allowed and stood outside the door after he slammed it unceremoniously in her face. He chucked on whatever he could find, not caring much what he looked like because Yuuko probably just needed an extra pair of hands and it would inevitably end up covered in horse shit. Once he was finally dressed and had his teeth and hair brushed, he dragged himself down the stairs and out the door, flopping into the passenger seat of Yuuko's Landie.  
'What the hell is so important that you had to wake me from the best night of sleep I've had in a long time?' He cast her a glare fit to kill to let her know he was not best pleased with her behaviour. 'Not to mention the reason I'm so tired is the social media crazy stuff caused by your rampant children.'  
'Trust me, you need to see this,' She grinned at him.  
'What?'  
She just tapped her nose enigmatically and kept driving, her eyes fixed on the road ahead of her.  
It was a short drive to Hasetsu Castle from Yuuri's family home, and they were there within no time. There was a massive expensive looking lorry parked in the drive, and he wondered if she'd brought in new horses. Unlikely, as she was up to her elbows in work already. It was light pink and gold with a black stencil of a jumping horse on the side, and there was some writing underneath it but Yuuri's eyesight didn't stretch that far and they passed it too quickly for him to read it anyway. He didn't know what had gotten Yuuko in such a hurry or what could possibly need this much secrecy. At this short notice, he was worried. He had never been one for surprises- they scared him. He always wanted to know exactly what was happening and when. She bundled him out of the car the second she had parked and towed him down towards the outdoor arena. There was a colossal set of fences up, each one at almost the top of the wings. Cantering in circles at the far end where he could barely make them out was a rider atop a large dappled grey horse with the most incredible cadence. He was sure he recognised the horse, but he couldn't be sure because he hadn't had time to retrieve his glasses from his bedside table.  
'So?' Yuuko squeaked breathlessly as the rider cantered into the first fence, demonstrating a flawless technique.  
'Yep. Cool,' He shrugged. 'The horse can jump. The rider can ride.'  
'Are you kidding me? Oh, you don't have your glasses on! That explains a lot,' She rolled her eyes, or he was pretty certain she did. Again, he couldn't tell. 'Just watch the way they ride. Don't you know who it is?'  
He leaned on the fence and squinted against the early morning sun streaming into his face, regarding closely the tight posture and the immobile lower leg. The only person he'd ever seen with such a good seat was- no way. It was not by any means possible. Unless... No. he refused to believe it. Russia was miles from Japan. That, and Victor Nikiforov would never have interest in a retired, useless showjumper from Japan, a country that barely ever produced any showjumpers worth talking about. There was no doubt in his mind, though, after he'd watched them riding a little longer. Nobody in the world rode like Victor did. He was possibly the only male rider not to hunch his shoulders and focus on keeping his leg stable.  
'What the fuck is Victor Nikiforov doing here?' He breathed, his mind spinning and not fully comprehending it just yet.  
'I have no idea,' She whispered. 'I don't speak Russian. He tried to explain earlier, and he definitely said your name. I think. He speaks English, right? Go talk to him.'  
'I can't!' He spluttered, stepping away from the fence. 'They say never meet your idols! And anyway, I have literally nothing to say to him.'  
'Go, you loser,' She shoved him in the direction of the gate, and it was at that moment Victor noticed them and waved vigorously.  
'Hi!' He called in English, and Yuuri glanced back at Yuuko, who ushered him forwards with her hands. He gulped and clicked open the gate, walking towards his childhood (and current) idol.  
'Umm, hi,' He called out, and Victor trotted over to halt squarely in front of him. 'I'm Yuuri Katsuki. Can- can I help you?'  
It was very distracting to have Victor's face staring down at him with curiosity.  
'I know who you are,' Victor beamed. 'I've come here to coach you.'  
Yuuri laughed hesitantly, but when it wasn't returned he stopped instantly.  
'Wait, seriously?' His jaw dropped to the ground.  
'Yes. I saw the video, and I was impressed. I want to be your coach, if you'll let me.'  
'Of course he will,' Yuuko appeared next to them, gripping Yuuri's arm so hard it hurt. He winced and slowly prised her pincer grip off of his elbow.  
'This is crazy!' He interjected. 'Absolutely insane! You're- you're Victor Nikiforov!'  
'Thanks. I hadn't noticed,' He winked, and Yuuri wanted to die.  
'Why the hell do you want to coach me?'  
'Because I think you have serious potential to be a top showjumper again.'  
'Again? I never was.'  
'Do you want me to coach you or not?'  
'I- I don't know!' Yuuri was very conflicted. On the one hand, this was his idol. He'd dreamt about stuff like this since the very first time he'd watched the ponies division and Victor had thrown his rosette into the crowd after winning, which Yuuri had caught and kept ever since. On the other, the idea of it terrified him because he wasn't good enough to be taught by somebody like Victor Nikiforov. Added to that, he didn't want to showjump. He was done with that.  
'I did come all the way from Russia,' Victor sighed impatiently. 'It would be very rude to refuse me now.'  
'Don't be stupid, Yuuri,' Yuuko berated him, and he wished she would supply him with actual advice rather than what was likely susceptibility to Victor's pure charm. 'Say yes to whatever he wants.'  
'Yes,' He stuttered, not able to say much else.  
'Great!' Victor smiled wider than before. 'First, we need to find you a horse. Turns out that lovely mate is not yours.'  
'I don't want a new horse,' He muttered, looking down at the floor. It felt like a betrayal of Vicchan.  
'Too bad. I have a load of warmbloods waiting in the stables for you to try out. Let's go get them!'

 

Yuuri tightened the girth of the first horse, a slender chestnut with small, wicked looking eyes. He instantly didn't like it. He wasn't sure if it was because of the eyes or because it wasn't Vicchan.  
'Just warm up quickly, get a feel for him,' Victor told him, and Yuuri was still in shock that he was riding a horse that Victor was possibly going to give to him as a ride. He trotted round on a loose rein, hoping Victor wouldn't be thinking about how much he'd pulled at Vicchan. That was all he could think of.  
'Pick up the reins more,' Victor called, and he chewed at the inside of his lip as he inched his hands further up the reins obediently. The horse came into a rounder contact and immediately the cadence of his trot was increased tenfold. He pushed on upwards into canter, concentrating on trying to find a rhythm. It no longer came so easily to him, especially given that this was not Vicchan and he was trying to find a rhythm that only suited his old horse.  
'You're interrupting his stride. Use a bit more leg and let him find himself,' Victor instructed as he hauled a wing across the arena, setting up a low oxer and directing him to come over it. Yuuri took a deep breath of the spring air and clicked his tongue on the approach, his nerves niggling at the back of his brain as they landed, but nothing out of the ordinary happened. The horse had an impeccable jump and would be perfect for anybody, but he just didn't get on with it. He probably could if he opened himself up to it a little more, but he wasn't prepared to do that.  
'I'm sorry,' He shook his head. 'It doesn't feel right.'  
'That's fine,' Victor smiled, but after the next four horses had been turned down he lost the smile. 'Are you sure you don't like her? This is the last one...'  
'I know, and I'm really so sorry for this,' Yuuri told himself that if he didn't accept any of the horses, he didn't have to go back to competing or jumping, because however much he'd enjoyed jumping them he was terrified of ruining one of Victor's incredible horses.  
'Right. Okay, I can work with that. We'll go to an auction.'  
This guy didn't give up, did he? Yuuri dismounted and dropped to the ground, leading the horse back to a stable and slinging her off distractedly. Victor came and leaned over the stable door, eyeing him intently. He didn't speak, just watched on silently. Once Yuuri had finished what he was doing, he opened the door for him and put a hand on his back.  
'There's an auction for jumpers nearby in about two hours. I kind of timed this day for that eventuality,' Victor chuckled to himself.  
'I don't have any money.'  
'Doesn't matter. What kind of a coach would I be if I didn't buy your horses for you?'  
'Umm... A normal one.'  
Victor cheerfully ignored this slightly cautious comment and took Yuuri by the arm, steering him out of the barn towards a very expensive looking top-of-the-range Oakley lorry. This was going to be one hell of a ride.  
As Victor drove, Yuuri sat in reflective silence deliberating over whether or not he was able to go through with this. It was crazy- it was borderline certifiable, but... There was something about Victor dropping everything to elope to Japan and become his coach that felt- he hesitated to say the word romantic, because that wasn't the word he was looking for, but there was something book-romantic about it. This was like his wildest fantasies coming true all at once. Now all he needed was for Vicchan to come galloping over the horizon, all fixed up and happy. Unlikely, but a boy can dream.  
Out of the corner of his eye, Victor watched Yuuri. He looked downright miserable to be in the car, which was a surprise after his behaviour at an awards ceremony two years ago, two nights before he'd lost his horse. He sympathised with him a bit in that respect, because he'd retired Makkachin, his childhood pony that had taken him to Europeans, a few months ago and it had deeply upset him. It wasn't quite the same though, because Makkachin was still rideable and moreover, he was alive. He wanted to say something that would comfort him, but no words suitable would come to his lips, so he said nothing to that effect. Instead, he tried to distract him.  
'Do you prefer mares or geldings?' He didn't want to make the decision for him, but with the way he'd quickly passed off every horse he'd sat on it seemed that he couldn't make it himself.  
'Umm, I don't know,' Yuuri mumbled, still not looking up from his lap. 'Depends on their personality.'  
Vicchan had been the softest, most forgiving horse in the stable and to ride, to the point that Yuuri had always hacked him down completely tackless to his field. He had never much liked highly-strung horses, so the gentle Irish Sport had been perfect for him. He didn't want another horse like that though, because he was afraid of loving it even half as much as he did Vicchan. Firstly, it felt like a betrayal of the highest order and secondly he never again wanted to feel the heartache of losing his best friend. Even if the horse never injured itself and stayed perfectly healthy throughout the duration of its life, he'd still have to watch it die of old age. The idea of it was enough to convince him that he needed a horse he'd not get on with. This was why when they finally made it to the auction he kept his card down for almost the whole thing. They were all so nice and had such clean, scopey jumps with picture perfect bascules and they were exactly what he didn't want. They were all completely proven already.  
'Are you sure you don't like this one?' Victor looked exhausted and definitely very disappointed. Yuuri knew that he had to buck up his ideas a bit or he'd lose him. This was his moment. Whatever appeared next, he would choose.  
The next horse came out, a towering black warmblood built like a freight train and practically cantering on the spot until it was let go to launch itself over the fences. It did so with both elegance and expressiveness, its ears pricked and nostrils flared. He looked up the heavens, asking why they had cursed him to such terrible luck. It looked terrifying to him, but he'd made up his mind and Victor definitely looked intrigued, leaning forwards in his seat and narrowing his eyes.  
'I like that one,' Yuuri said, already regretting his decision. This feeling of apprehension was doubled when he saw the horse bite its trainer. Victor grinned and held up the card. Nobody else challenged him, which was surprising because they'd been ruthlessly pitted against each other for every other horse.  
'I'm surprised,' Victor commented once he'd successfully attained the horse and they were leading him down to the lorry. 'Considering he's the least qualified. You a build up from the ground kind of guy?'  
'Oh, I didn't really listen to what they were saying.'  
'Seriously? Okay,' Victor handed the horse over, and Yuuri practically trembled with fear. The horse was huge, at least 17hh and probably exceeding that mark by far, and it was tugging at the lead rope in his hands as he led him. A more accurate term was probably being dragged.  
'17.2hh 6 year old Holstein, old owner found him to be too much but did manage to take him to a few discoveries. He's quite the character,' Victor continued, lowering the ramp and gesturing for him to load up. Yuuri hesitantly walked up the ramp, turning round for a second to ask what the name of the horse was.  
'You don't even know that? Did you just close your eyes and point? It's Eros.'  
Yuuri half-laughed because that was essentially what he had done. Eros bounded up the ramp behind him, his hooves rapping hard on the wood. Yuuri tied him up as quickly as he could, not quite trusting his long legs or his teeth that looked like somebody had rasped them into points. He hurried back down the ramp, quickly heaving it up again and locking the doors on his new steed.  
When he climbed up into the front, Victor was on the phone looking very distressed. He was speaking in Russian, so Yuuri didn't know what the conversation was concerning, but it didn't appear to be an enjoyable one. Victor was gripping the steering wheel with his free hand so tight that his knuckles had turned white. Without really thinking about what he was doing, Yuuri reached out and put his own hand over it. Victor startled, looking down as his eyes widened. He looked questioningly at Yuuri, who only blushed and retracted his hand quicker than if it had been burnt. Victor seemed more relaxed the next time he spoke though, and he hung up quickly after that.  
'Sorry about that,' He smiled, and Yuuri detected a hint of sadness behind it.  
'Who was it?' It felt too personal to ask, but he couldn't help it. It was only natural that he hated to see the one person he had always revered so highly upset.  
'Jakov, my coach. He's annoyed that I came here to coach you, but don't worry.'  
'Why?'  
'Well for one, Yuri is having a tantrum.'  
Yuri Plisetsky was a world renowned junior showjumper who was moving up from ponies this season. He was infamous on every circuit for having the most aggressive riding style ever, winning each and every competition he entered with his downright suicidal jumpoff turns and ponies just as dedicated as him. His most recent horse, Agape, was just 14.2hh and already they were storming the 1.20 tracks together, accumulating a colossal pile of trophies and red rosettes. Yuuri may have quit competing, but he didn't miss a beat when it came to the people still in the game. Besides, though following Victor he always saw Yuri popping up on his timeline. Victor was always reposting cliche quotes and Yuri would comment sardonic things like 'you're literally the Louie Spence of the horse world', or this was what the terrible translations brought him.  
'What are you going to do about it?' Yuuri queried, watching how Victor's tension slowly left his body and his easy smile returned like it had never left.  
'I'm going to invite them to train here,' He said with a firm tone. 'Is there space?'  
'I'm sure Yuuko would welcome it.'  
'Phew. It might be nice for Yuri to have somebody to talk to other than me at shows. He's younger than everybody else, and I think he tries to hide it but he gets lonely.'  
'I'll do what I can.'  
'Really?' Victor looked like he'd just told him he'd won the lottery. 'Thank you so much. I'll call Jakov when we're home.'  
'Home?'  
'Uh, Yuuko told me I could stay at your house.'  
'She doesn't live in my house,' Yuuri didn't think he could handle living in the same building as Victor- not to mention he had posters of him plastered on his walls! He fired a text in record speed to Mari to take them down. 'And how did she tell you anyway? She doesn't speak English.'  
'She used google translate. Badly done, but she got the point across.'  
Yuuri chuckled and rolled his eyes, beginning to feel a little more at ease.  
'If you're my coach now, am I competing?'  
'Of course. But not for a good few weeks, okay? We need to get you back in shape.'  
'I'm in shape,' Yuuri pointed out, tensing his stomach. All his long days shovelling shit and heaving around tack for people has toughened him up, and he felt fitter than ever.  
'Hmm. Your ass has shrunk,' Victor pouted, saying this with all the nonchalance anybody could possibly muster. Yuuri choked on his own tongue, his hands flying to cover his face that had turned bright red.  
'What the hell?' He blurted out, no longer caring that this was Victor Nikiforov, the person he definitely shouldn't be cursing at. The fact was, he had been looking at his ass! Victor had noticed that his ass was smaller. This meant he'd noticed it before and remembered it.  
'You hadn't noticed?'  
'I don't spend hours in front of the mirror wondering if my butt looks small.'  
'Oh,' Victor looked surprised, and again Yuuri snorted. Did that mean he did? It didn't come as a surprise to him, seeing as his hair was perfectly styled and he was most definitely wearing the tightest jodhpurs possible to accentuate his muscular thighs and ass. Ugh, he didn't want to think like this. He wanted to get home, hide under a rock for a few years and let everything blow over.


	4. Chapter 4

'Victor, have you ever eaten katsudon before?' Yuuri's mother asked, and Victor looked very apologetic.  
'Mum, he doesn't speak Japanese,' Yuuri hesitated to remind her, and she in turn looked the same. 'She asked if you've ever eaten pork cutlet bowls before.'  
'I can't say I have,' Victor shook his head, looking down at the bowl she'd given him. He tucked in eagerly, and his eyes shone as he ate it. 'Vkusno!'  
Yuuri's mother smiled back at him, ensnared by his sophisticated charm already. Yuuko kept glancing at her brother across the table, and Victor couldn't for the life of him work out why. She looked very concerned, and he wanted to know what could be wrong.  
Yuuri's mother had invited Yuuko to dinner, and she hadn't stopped fussing over him for a minute. It probably had something to do with the fact that in one day, his idol had hurricaned in and announced himself as his new coach and he'd had a new horse forced upon him, one that she could tell wasn't to his tastes at all. He kind of wanted to avoid that conversation, so the second they had finished eating he asked his mother where Victor would be staying so he could take him to his room.  
'I thought your room would be okay. I put a mattress on the floor,' She dropped this bombshell casually and he briefly considered digging a hole in the ground with his chopsticks and lying in it for several days. He gestured to Victor to pass him his bowl, which he took through to the kitchen and cleaned up for him.  
'I can do that,' Victor tried to take it from him, standing way too close behind him, but Yuuri shook his head.  
'It's fine,' He forced himself to inhale deeply and calm down a bit because his heart was hammering way too fast and his head was spinning like mad to the point where he thought he might collapse. He put the bowl on the draining board and leaned against the sink, closing his eyes for a second.  
'Are you alright?' Victor placed a hand on his lower back, and Yuuri's heart sped up again. He could feel the heat from his hand and it was making him itch.  
'Fine,' He said hurriedly, straightening up and stepping away. 'I know this is awkward, but you're sleeping in my room. Are you sure you don't want to stay in a hotel somewhere?'  
'I need to get to know you, so I really don't mind.'  
Yuuri pressed himself to cheer up and act as normal as he could in the presence of somebody who was a massive celebrity in his world. It didn't help that he was practically inviting him into his bed, but he managed to relax somewhat and lead Victor up the stairs to his poky little room, which he gratefully noted was sans-posters. Victor's suitcase was already lying on the bed, the handle swamped with travel tags. Of course he travelled a lot- he was constantly competing internationally. He sat down and thumbed through them, marvelling at all the places he had been. They ranged from England to Saudi, places Yuuri had watched him on screen competing, and once or twice he'd been pitted against him, although he'd not once come near him in the rankings. He looked up and Victor was standing over him, an incalculable expression on his handsome face. They didn't say anything, just stared at each other for a good long while before Yuuri became uncomfortable and dropped his gaze.  
'Yuuri Katsuki, you have no self confidence,' Victor remarked, shocking him. 'And if you have no confidence, neither will your horse.'  
'You hardly know me,' Yuuri pointed out, still dizzy from both high panic levels and the weight of what Victor had said. He was right, but it didn't mean it was any less humiliating to hear it. Was he really that transparent?  
'I don't need to. You can't even meet my eyes for more than five seconds.'  
'I'm shy.'  
'No, you're afraid of me. Come here.'  
Yuuri froze for a moment, then stood up and walked to stand in front of the person he'd not once spoken a word to until that day but had heard his voice in his dreams for years. That person then put a hand either side of his face and leaned in close, so close Yuuri could feel his breath against his lips. He looked down, again unable to meet his gaze.  
'Look at me,' Victor ordered, and he did so with a great display of reluctance. 'There. That isn't so hard, is it? See, I'm just a normal person. Granted, I have a lot more medals than normal people, but I'm not any different to you because of that.'  
Yuuri nodded and took a few steps back, trying to distance himself from Victor before he fainted. All the stress of everything being piled onto him so quickly added to the pressure of being coached by somebody he couldn't even make eye contact with and his sudden return to a showjumping career he no longer wanted had left him exhausted and nauseated.  
'Yuuri, are you okay?' Victor asked, then darted forwards just in time to catch him as he tilted towards the floor, his eyes drooping shut and his body going limp momentarily. When he came to after a mere half-second of unconsciousness, he looked very peaky. 'You need to get some sleep.'  
Yuuri nodded and allowed Victor to help him to his bed and lie him down, pulling the duvet over him and tucking him in gently. He would have laughed had he the strength, but instead he just closed his eyes and curled into a ball.  
Victor watched over Yuuri with undisguised concern, his face creased with worry. He had always known he was awkward and self-deprecating, but this was pretty extreme. None of this was what he had expected; firstly, it was Yuuri himself who had suggested he become his coach two years ago at an awards ceremony, and now he was acting as if he didn't remember any of it. Fair enough, he had been considerably inebriated and it was entirely within reasonable doubt that he really didn't recall it. If so, that would explain his confusion. He obviously hadn't anticipated that it would be perfect from the get go, but this was beyond measure and he wasn't entirely sure he could go through with it. He had to though, because Yuuri had so much potential and there was no possible way he could be allowed to slip silently from the sport like he had tried so desperately to do. Nobody had ever paid him any mind and that was so infuriating to Victor, who knew what it meant to be the kind of person to walk into a room and catch everybody's attention instantly. He wanted Yuuri to have that so he could understand how wonderful he really was. He may have only talked to him that once at the awards ceremony, but he'd been watching him from afar at many a competition and closely observing his progress. What he'd done with Vicchan had been a very impressive feat, but he hadn't had enough recognition for it. For the most part, his lack of admirers was Victor's inspiration for coming to coach him. There was another part of him here for a different reason, but he was trying to ignore it for the time being. If Yuuri didn't remember that night at the awards ceremony, he certainly wouldn't know anything about this small part of Victor. Scaring him now would only make things worse, so Victor left him to sleep and made his way downstairs to go for a walk and clear his head. It turned out Hasetsu Castle stables was in walking distance of the house, and he ended up there after half an hour quite by coincidence. The sun was beginning to set by this point and it was nestling itself in a corner of the horizon, illuminating the blooming Sakura trees across the landscape as they scattered their petals. He sat on a fence in one of the paddocks watching to watch the sun as it dropped below the horizon, dissolving the place into a dusky darkness. Her last few rays provided a shadowy cast of penumbreal glow, and he used these last dredges of light to wander back to the stable block, where he saw a vaguely familiar proud head popping over a door.  
'Hi, Eros,' He stuck his hand out and let the horse sniff his palm before he scratched behind his ears and rubbed his nose. The horse snorted amiably and allowed it. 'You and I need to have a little talk.'  
He undid the bolt of the door and let himself into the stable, his hands running over Eros' body to judge his conformation. Slight lack of muscle on the hind end but strong in the shoulder a very thick topline, implying this was a headstrong horse that easily got on the forehand. He picked his feet up with an attitude that reminded Victor of Yuri's pony, affectionately nicknamed 'Fluffy' by its owner and less affectionately 'Satan' by its previous grooms, all of whom had suffered broken bones at the end of its overactive hind legs and snapping teeth. Victor was a staunch believer that a horse's personality reflected their owner, and Fluffy (or more commonly known by her showname, Agape) was a prime example of this. Yuri was unbeatable in the ring thanks only to his competitive nature. He wasn't afraid of taking any and every turn, whatever stride came to him in the spur of the moment and all at intense speeds. These moves alone didn't win him titles- it was the fact that his horses were all just as ruthless as he was. He brought out the competitive side in everything he sat on, and it could be truly terrifying to watch. He knew for a fact Jakov had a small heart attack every time his youngest pupil approached a fence. He would get this determined look on his face and with one kick a stride away from the fence he'd take off, chucking the reins at his horse- something Jakov always gave him a right dressing down for.  
He couldn't see Eros and Yuuri having an instantaneous affinity for each other, and this was reason for concern to him. Yuuri was just coming back into the sport and he had zero confidence in his abilities, plus he was a very shy and closed off person. Eros was visibly very highly strung and he'd heard from the old rider that he had some major temperament issues now and then. This didn't instil him with much confidence, but this was his job now. He had to find a way that they could work together and finally allow Yuuri to be seen for who he really was- a phenomenal horseman and a star in the making. 

 

'Okay, we'll start off nice and gentle,' Victor called out to Yuuri as he walked Eros round the arena, adjusting his seat a little further back after already having dealt with a few spooks at the frankly terrifying mirrors at each end of the arena. He was grateful to have been riding Yuuko's youngsters, because otherwise he would not have been prepared for Eros' huge leaps at every given opportunity.  
'Can I take these spurs off?' Yuuri called back, looking down at his feet anxiously. He definitely didn't need any more forwards movement on this horse, given that already it felt like he had a freight train on the other end of the reins.  
'Not until you learn to put your leg on more consistently. Shorten your reins and pick up a slow trot.'  
Yuuri squeezed lightly, but with the added leg aid from the spurs he was wearing this was too much and Eros burst forward into a choppy canter, head vertical and legs stamping the ground hard.  
'Great trot,' Victor muttered, shaking his head and leaving Yuuri to get on with it. He did manage to drop back to trot, but not before Eros threw in a colossal buck that very nearly unseated him completely.  
'Sorry,' Yuuri squeaked as he scrambled to pick up his reins again.  
'What are you apologising for? Get it together and make the damn horse trot without being a brat.'  
Yuuri gritted his jaw and squeezed again, much lighter this time, and Eros picked up a trot with more cadence than anything he'd ridden in his life. He stopped for a moment to shorten his stirrups, barely trusting his legs to keep him on board.  
'Oh, you want to jump today?' Victor took his stirrup-shortening as a sign that he did. 'Good. I'll put up a few small ones, you go warm up.'  
Yuuri reflected to himself that he'd probably rather die than jump this horse, but he didn't seem to have a choice in the matter because when he tried to ask Victor if they could stick to flatwork, he was already lugging along some wings and placing them, therefore unable to hear a thing. He sighed heavily and resumed trotting around, trying to encourage suppleness and bend. All he got in return when he put his inside leg on was Eros veering sideways and almost ramming him into the fence. He pulled up, deciding that testing his brakes was definitely in order. Eros didn't like the idea of stopping much and it took a good few strides of uncomfortable jogging until he halted very suddenly, quite of his own accord, making Yuuri tilt forwards just a little too far. This sent Eros off on a rampage again, wheeling about and spending more time on two legs than he did on all fours.  
'I look away for two seconds and already you've lost him. Sit up and kick him on, take control!' Victor instructed, but Yuuri was far too afraid to move his legs from their safety position, rammed forwards with his heels jammed down as far as they could go. He couldn't go through with this- it was just too much. Eros was too much; he couldn't handle this much horse, especially after a two year break from competition horses.  
'I'm sorry,' He gabbled as Eros keened one way and the other until he finally tired and stopped dramatically, snorting loudly and pawing at the ground in agitation. 'I don't think this is going to work.'  
He felt awful, because Victor had bought this horse for him and he didn't want to seem ungrateful, but it felt like it was only going to end in tears. Victor gestured for him to turn in, which he did and halted in front of him.  
'What you need to do,' Victor stepped forwards and took his hands, sliding them further up the reins and closing them with his own. 'Is hold the reins tightly. Wrap your fingers round them and if he starts doing that again, send him forwards into the contact. I know it's scary, and I know you're not used to it, but you can't get used to it if you don't push through it. Okay?'  
'Okay,' Yuuri nodded, taking a deep breath and walking on again. 'But no jumping today.'  
'No jumping today,' Victor agreed, patting Eros on the rump and sending them off. He watched as Yuuri began trotting around again, a little shakier than before but with a firmer hold on his horse's mouth. He still hadn't the faintest inkling on how to get them working as a team. At least in the next few days Jakov would arrive and he could ask his advice, even if he was hacked off that Victor had dropped everything to move to Japan and coach a dropout who still didn't understand the basics of a contact. At least he could sit a buck he noted as Eros threw in a few flybucks to make a point.  
'Correct with the leg, not the reins,' He instinctually called, but then he remembered that this wasn't Yuri. If anything, it would've been easier on him to deal with a rider like Yuri, whose immediate response to nerves was to get handsy. At least then it would show that Yuuri had some confidence in his strength.  
It struck him then that Yuuri wasn't scared of the horse, he was afraid of hurting it. The sheer force on the head of this horse made him consider bitting up as an option, but that wouldn't help Yuuri in the slightest.  
'Lean back, leg on,' He corrected, debating on whether or not he should suggest jumping to give the pair something to concentrate on. It was clear they weren't getting very far like this. Yuuri had specifically stated he didn't want to jump however, and he wanted to respect his wishes. If he wasn't up to jumping, he wasn't up to jumping. That was final. Victor decided to crack on and focus their attention on something completely different.  
'Yuuri, how much dressage have you done?'  
'Dressage? Oh, barely any, unless you count general flatwork. Why?'  
'We're doing some.'  
'Are you converting me to a dressage rider?' Yuuri felt a little hopeful at the prospect. It sounded a lot nicer than having to jump the way things were going- or the way he thought he was going, which was down.  
'No, but you can't jump without a solid foundation. It'll teach you some control and balance too. We'll start with the basics. 20 metre circle at A, and open your hand towards the inside,' He observed as Yuuri did just this, shaking his head. 'Shorten your reins up and push him forwards into the contact. You're being too soft on him. Have a bit of an argument, make him drop his head, and then you can soften.'  
It took a few laps of the circle for Eros to come close to dropping his head, and even then he still hovered defiantly in front of the vertical.  
'Take sitting trot,' Victor told him, scratching his head a bit. 'Shoulders behind your hips, try to engage your seat a bit more.'  
It was clear to him that Yuuri had neglected his flatwork a lot, and it wasn't paying off. There was a lot of work ahead of them, but at least it gave them something to work on. It was slow, it was steady and it definitely wasn't going to frighten Yuuri like jumping would. If they just stuck with all four feet on the ground and progressed slowly through basic dressage training, jumping would follow effortlessly after that had been achieved, with a little trust on the side.  
'Time to crack out the dressage tome,' He muttered to himself. He'd formerly been a dressage rider at a lower level, but it had never ignited his passion like showjumping did. He could very easily have switched Yuuri to dressage, because both horse and rider had the potential, but he knew in his heart that they'd always be lusting after the thrill of a double clear against the clock. Once a showjumper, always a showjumper. He had to get Yuuri seeing things the same way he did.


	5. Chapter 5

One Russian arriving suddenly and diving headfirst into his life was quite enough for Yuuri. Unfortunately, life like to roll right past his wishes and dump him with just what he didn't need. Six days after his first ride on Eros, Yuri Plisetsky arrived at Hasetsu Castle. If Yuuri had thought watching him compete was nail-biting, he was laughing on the other side of his face now. They'd met once prior to his arrival, and it was a few hours before Vicchan's fatal fall. Yuri had been nothing but callous, telling him that he was graduating onto horses soon and there needn't be two Yuris. Yuuri highly doubted he'd remember this encounter- two years was a long time, after all. Yuri had gotten what he wanted, anyway. For two years, at least.   
He'd arrived early that morning with his infamous chestnut mare, Agape, covered in stable stains and with an attitude that rivalled his. Victor had been elated to see him, and had at once gone to pet Agape- or Fluffy, as she was apparently known by those who had the misfortune of knowing her on a personal level. He'd come away with a bleeding finger and a bruised leg from a well-aimed strike.   
'Still haven't taught her any manners, have you?' He lectured Yuri, preaching that he had to earn her respect. In answer to this, Yuri walked right up to her and displayed the kind of behaviour that would get anybody else kicked- he rubbed in between her front legs. Her head lowered and she turned into a docile beach donkey, nodding her head up and down slowly in deep relaxation.   
'I think you need to earn her respect,' Yuri retorted, a grin forming on his face. 'So, where's the pig you ditched mother Russia for?'  
'You mean Yuuri?' Victor smacked him over the head for his uncouth manner. 'Over there. Go say hi, and be polite for god's sake.'  
Yuri shuffled over to Yuuri, looking impertinent as ever.   
'Hi,' He grumbled, then retreated back to Victor. 'Where did the old man go?'  
'Jakov has gone to look around the training facilities. How about we all go for a hack?' Victor suggested, wanting a chance for Yuuri and Yuri to get better acquainted. 'Yuri, you can borrow one of my horses.'  
'I'll ride Fluffy,' He was about to dash for his tack, but Victor grabbed him by the collar.   
'She needs rest after a long flight. You can ride Aria.'  
'I'm not riding that stupid thing.'  
Aria was the horse Victor mostly competed on, and the pair were as of yet unbeaten. Yuri and Jakov couldn't understand why, because the horse was a complete dolt. She had no sense and would probably try to run under fences if it weren't for Victor guiding her with expertise. Jakov was still trying to convince Victor to sell her, but he couldn't find any takers because the second Victor left her side her IQ dropped 100%.   
'Why not? She's a total schoolmaster!'  
'She's brainless! She spooks at everything and last time I rode her she wouldn't even trot.'  
'I don't get why you all think she's stupid. Could a stupid horse win an Olympic gold medal?'  
'Yes. Aria did.'  
'Fine. You can ride Makkachin.'  
Yuri grinned with satisfaction- he adored riding the fluffy mammoth on hacks. He skipped off to tack up, and that left Victor and Yuuri together. They hadn't really spoken much in the past week outside of talk of Eros and what they planned to do. Every spare moment was taken up by competition plans and Yuuri's work, which he had refused to give up because it gave him an excuse to get away from Victor for a few hours. He loved being around him, but it still terrified him to an extent.   
'Is Eros going to be okay to hack?' Yuuri bit his lip, looking at his horse over the stable door and letting himself be swamped by his anxiety.   
'Perfectly fine,' Victor tried to smooth talk him round his nerves. 'He was only taking the piss earlier.'  
Victor went and got his saddle for him, frowning as he placed it on Eros' back (almost getting his head taken off in the process).   
'How old is this?' He asked Yuuri as he put the bridle on, having to stretch to reach his ears to pull the headpiece over.   
'It's the one I've always used,' Yuuri told him, buckling up the flash and clipping the martingale to the breastplate.   
'I'm buying you a new one. You can't keep riding in this!'  
'Why not?'  
'For starters, it's not even got flair technology!'  
'Are you kidding me?' Yuuri sighed, exasperated. 'Fine. Do what you want.'  
'Are you mad?' Victor gently grabbed his wrist, pulling him near. 'I'm only thinking of your safety.'  
'Sorry. I didn't mean to snap, it's just I used to ride Vicchan with that saddle,' Yuuri fought hard to keep the tears from welling up in his eyes, but not hard enough. A single droplet beaded as he blinked, and Victor must have noticed it because he hugged him tightly. Yuuri went stiff, but then returned the embrace. It felt good to have somebody comfort him, especially somebody like Victor Nikiforov.   
'I understand it's hard for you, but you have to move on,' Victor murmured in his ear. 'It's the only way this is going to work- you have to let go, or it's not fair on Eros. Or me, for that matter. I want to see you succeed. I want everybody to know who you are. Now go get your hat, man up and ride on.'  
Yuuri smiled and went to put on his hat. He bumped into Yuri in the tack room, who was sat on a tack box looking conflicted.   
'Yuuri, I want to apologise,' He said quickly, standing up. 'For what I said before that competition. It was horrible and I was just nervous and-'  
'It's fine,' Yuuri was surprised he still remembered, much less wanted to apologise for it. He'd been thirteen at the time, so hormones were probably taking over his body.   
'And... I'm sorry about Vicchan. That really sucks.'  
'Oh. Thanks,' He didn't really know what to say to that. He'd never understood why people apologised for the misfortunes of others when they clearly weren't at fault. 'I guess we should go get on. Victor doesn't like to be kept waiting.'  
'I know. I've trained with him since I was six.'  
Yuuri was sure he could detect a little jealousy behind these words, and reminded himself to make sure he didn't exacerbate this because he was afraid of this blond bombshell. 

Yuuri was surprised to find that Victor was very adept at orienteering. He managed to pick out his own hacking route very quickly, which he had to anyway after he'd claimed the position of lead file. Eros was mannerly enough slotted in behind Saint Petersburg, otherwise known as Saint, Victor's up and coming greenie. Once they reached the first open field though, he exploded into a ball of energy. He was right up on his toes, champing on the bit and cat-leaping like a three year old faced with their first open water.   
'I guess we should gallop, then,' Victor shrugged, and before Yuuri could protest he had inched up into a canter, and then Yuri overtook the both of them and suddenly Eros was off like a shot, levelling up quickly with Yuri despite how much he was flapping about trying to gain speed. Victor, determined not to be left behind, extended into a gallop and then it dissolved into chaos. Victor and Yuri remained relatively in control, but Yuuri knew from the way Eros had his neck set that he wasn't going to be able to stop. Soon Victor and Yuri dropped far behind him and he was left thundering full speed towards the hedge at the end of the field. If this had been a movie, maybe they would have jumped it and Yuuri would have realised what a talented horse he had, but instead this was real life and he had actual knowledge of how horses worked. If Eros was faced with that hedge at the speed he was going now, he'd stop dead and Yuuri would be impaled on a branch in no time. Even if he tried to jump it, he'd never make it because he was going far too fast. He turned a very wide corner, paralysed by fear of slipping after what had happened with Vicchan, and pointed Eros straight at Saint and Makkachin, praying that once he spotted his friends and reached them he would stop. Thankfully, he was correct, but Victor was looking less than impressed.  
'And what do you call that? Are you training a racehorse now?' He asked drily, raising an eyebrow.  
'I might've lost control,' Yuuri confessed sheepishly, though he knew it was fairly evident from the steam rising from Eros' coat and his own mud-spattered face.   
'I can see that.'  
'Why not just get a stronger bit?' Yuri looked between the two of them.   
'That's not the answer to every problem,' Victor chided him swiftly. 'You should know that by now.'  
'Yeah, but this problem looks like a brakes problem, and if it's a brakes problem then you need a stronger bit.'  
'He has a point,' Yuuri shrugged, and Victor was surprised that he of all people would agree. 'I'm not a huge fan of not being able to stop.'  
'But didn't Vicchan-'  
'Like you said, I need to move on,' He said, and although the set of his jaw implied that he really wasn't moving on, Victor nodded.   
'Okay. When we're buying your new saddle, we'll get you a bit as well.'  
'Are you saying you've already bought him a twenty grand horse and now you're buying him a saddle too?'  
'Hang on, Eros was only twenty thousand?' Yuuri's heart stopped- twenty thousand yen was nothing for a top showjumper like this. What the hell kind of bargains was Victor pulling? He felt slightly less guilty for agreeing to take him on now if he hadn't cost an astronomical amount.   
'Uh, that's in British pounds,' Victor admitted, and Yuuri's heart stopped again.   
'That's almost three million yen!' He cried, feeling a bit sick. 'You can't spend money like that on somebody you don't know!'  
'You two know each other very well,' Yuri muttered, and Yuuri shot him a questioning look.   
'Yuri, don't-' Victor tried to stop him, but there was no halting him when he was dishing out gossip and embarrassing tales.   
'You know,' He grinned, cottoning onto the fact that Yuuri had forgotten all about it just by Victor's furious expression. 'When you got really drunk at that awards ceremony and you and Cris Giacometti basically pole danced together, then you and Victor danced for like an hour. It was crazy.'  
'What?' Yuuri was still frowning, remembering none of this and absolutely sure he was joking until he caught Victor's amused expression as he bit back a laugh. 'No way! No, that did not happen!'  
'I still have pictures,' Victor confessed, digging into his gilet pocket and pulling out his phone. He spent a few minutes scrolling through his phone until he found the photos he was looking for. Yuuri flicked through them and felt like crying. Had he really been that rambunctious? He knew he'd inherited his father's lack of tolerance for drink but propensity to drink a lot anyway and go off the rails, but he hadn't thought it was this bad. There were pictures of him with his shirt unbuttoned, hanging off his chest as he and Victor jigged together, both red faced and laughing raucously. He handed the phone back quickly and buried his face in Eros' neck.   
'I'm so embarrassed,' He mumbled, barely audible. 'I can't believe that happened. And everybody saw?'  
'Everybody,' Yuri giggled, delighted to be able to torture him like this. 'Some people said that was the real reason you quit showjumping.'  
With that, Yuuri suggested they headed home, because he couldn't take the humiliation of it anymore. Victor was adept at directions and they were back before they knew it, upon which Yuuri all but threw his tack back onto its rack and sprinted up the backstairs to his little den where he could be alone for a while. He sat down on the chair and picked up one of his favourite photos of him and Vicchan together. It was from their first meeting, when Yuuri had tried him out at the trekking centre he was being sold from. At the time, he hadn't had the funds to purchase a proper showjumper, but there had been a scruffy horse for sale at a trekking centre and Yuuko had persuaded him to go and see it. It had been love at first sight and they'd been inseparable up until their last moment together, when Yuuri had been knelt on the floor with Vicchan's head in his lap as he was out to sleep, sobbing his heart out. He explained to Vicchan's ashes that he kept under lock and key in the cupboard what had happened over the past week and apologised for not visiting sooner. He told Vicchan how awful he felt about having a new horse and that he had never meant for it to go this far, but he was too afraid to refuse anything because people would harass him for not taking the opportunity and he may end up regretting it for the rest of his life. Besides, he couldn't offend Victor. He locked the cupboard back up and his eyes glazed over as he reminisced about the times he and Vicchan had enjoyed together. He thought of their first competition, when he'd fallen off at the third fence after a particularly rocky approach leading to a predictable stop. He'd kept going though, and after what felt like years of blood, sweat and many tears they made it to their first international show, where they took 5th place even with four faults. Then he thought of the first (and only) time they had won an international show- as the only clear round, it was a steal. It hadn't perhaps been the most prestigious of shows, but he was still proud of what Vicchan had achieved coming from such a blurry background of backyard breeders and being neglected at a rundown trekking centre. Despite all that he had been subjected to, he had done whatever Yuuri had asked of him and more. He'd taken him to places he'd never even dreamed of going, and the top had been so close he might have tasted it if only that last ride hadn't been so fatally disastrous. He missed that feeling of rising up through the ranks, taking everybody by surprise. He wondered if he could ever do that again. Maybe now was his time; he could be like a Phoenix, rising from the ashes stronger than ever. It stood to reason because now he had an incredible coach and a horse he should have seen as perfect. He could do that again, couldn't he? He could win. He could be a showstopper if only he could get over his nerves. What the hell was wrong with him? He was being given the chance of a lifetime and he was throwing it away over an accident that had happened two years ago and hadn't technically been his fault. He had to work harder and please Victor, make him see that he was worth the effort and he hadn't come to Japan for no reason. There were just two colossal hurdles; number one being his anxiety and lack of confidence, number two being his horse. He didn't know what he could do about the first, but he knew just the person to help him with the second. A hand brushing against his shoulder jolted him from his reverie and it took a second to refocus his vision again so that he could see Victor stood next to him, a kindly smile etched onto his face as always.   
'He was quite the horse,' His voice was quiet, and Yuuri was grateful. He'd never let anybody but Yuuko see this room, but he didn't so much mind Victor being there because he was quiet and respectful. He had let Yuuri have his moment alone and waited to talk to him.   
'Yeah, he was,' He smiled back. 'Sorry I ran off so quickly, I-'  
'No, I understand. Don't worry about it, by the way. I'd kind of forgotten too. I mean, it was a little weird for me that you didn't remember because of the coach thing, but...'  
'There's more?'   
'Oh wow. You really don't remember any of it, do you?' He chuckled softly. 'You kind of begged me to be your instructor. It was cute, honestly. Not weird at all.'  
'If you don't mind, I'm going to leave now,' Yuuri's eyes widened.   
'Where are you going?'  
'To hang myself. Or something. I don't know.'  
'Don't be like that! The way I see it, you were drunk, I was slightly tipsy, we had a fun night.'  
'You say that like there was more to it.'  
'Oh yes Yuuri, all through the night you and I made hot-' Victor paused for dramatic effect, seeing how distressed Yuuri looked to be. 'I'm kidding! Yuuri, I'm kidding!'  
Yuuri genuinely looked like he was about to cry, so Victor dived forwards and bundled him into an awkward hug, upon which he subsequently burst into tears. He didn't really know why he was crying, but it was comforting to have Victor's arms around him and so he let it out. Even though apart from an apparent night of drunken follies he knew nothing of they'd known each other a few short days (in which they'd barely spent a moment together outside of training and even at night Yuuri went straight to sleep before Victor came to bed), Yuuri felt an overwhelming sense of trust. Just like that, it was like the skies had cleared and the veil lifted from his eyes. He understood now that Victor truly was there to help him, and him alone, not pressure him into doing things he didn't want to do. He stepped back, took one last look at the photos and rosettes on the wall, and walked back down the stairs. That would be the last time in a long while he would visit Vicchan.


	6. Chapter 6

The next day, Yuri joined in with Yuuri's training. Five minutes after Yuuri had mounted and begun trotting slowly around, still crapping himself every time Eros moved half an inch faster than he wanted, Yuri came trotting in and began cantering round, setting Eros off on a tirade of bucking.   
'Yuri, stop being an asshole!' Victor yelled at him, setting up a small crosspole and waving at him to come over it. This he did, with no grace or elegance. He just pointed and kicked, Agape launching herself over it with a grunt and kicking out violently on the other side. Yuuri gulped as Victor told him to come over it. He hadn't jumped Eros yet, as they'd been concentrating on mastering his quirks on the flat. Even then, he hadn't come to terms with the horse's big, expressive paces and he just knew he would have a jump to match. He picked up canter, Eros diving into the pace, and established as best a rhythm as he could given that he didn't really have the best brakes even in the new bit. The approach was messy because Eros decided he'd prefer to move sideways rather than forwards.   
'Leg,' Victor growled, finally sounding like a real instructor. Yuuri tensed up and rammed his lower leg forward rather than put it in, causing him to get behind the movement and catch Eros in the mouth as they landed.   
'I'm sorry,' He squeaked as Eros plunged about on the other side, infuriated that his jump had been interrupted.   
'Again,' Victor instructed, crossing his arms and leaning on one hip. 'And this time, don't let me see that leg come forwards. Sit and squeeze. Let go of your leg! It's supposed to be underneath you, not behind your horse's ears!'  
He tried to do what he was told, but it was like a mental block had been put between his brain and his body. He was terrified of the idea of Eros taking off again, and the idea of asking him to go forward scared him far more than being left behind. He came over it once more and the exact same thing happened.   
'Right, you need to listen to me,' Victor sounded scarily close to annoyed this time, and Yuuri felt his lower lip trembling. 'If you jam your leg like that, it's only going to make matters worse. Once you're brave enough to put your leg back on, he won't be used to it and it'll create a huge problem for you. Basically, the more you squeeze and kick now, the less he'll run on in the future.'  
'Okay,' Yuuri held his breath, something he was guilty of doing when the panic began to creep in.   
'Hey, relax,' Victor put a hand on his thigh, making him blush stupidly. 'We all get scared. You'll be fine.'  
Yuuri felt reassured and this time when he pushed Eros up into canter he was audacious enough to squeeze lightly. He jumped forwards, unseating him a little but not enough to disrupt the flow of the movement. He forced himself to take a deep breath and put his leg on stronger whilst keeping a hold of the front end to contain the energy. This time, he timed the jump perfectly and on the other side, managed to successfully pull up whilst keeping his core engaged and his leg underneath him.   
'Perfect!' Victor cheered, applauding him. 'God, I could just kiss you!'  
'Don't you dare,' Yuri snapped, cantering in between them as if to split them up. 'I need Victor to stay as my coach.'  
Yuuri was not as grossed out by the idea as he might have liked to be, although he hurried to remind himself it was because Victor was his all-time idol. Anyway, he didn't know what the hell Yuri was going on about. It was only an expression. The two riders stood in the centre as Victor set up an exercise for them. Yuuko was standing at the side watching, and she waved at Yuuri as he trotted past to come down through the grid.   
'This is an exercise in collection for you, Yuuri. I want you to put two strides in the first and one in the second,' Victor told him, standing to the side and rubbing his chin. He watched Yuuri's approach, his mind working at a thousand miles an hour trying to figure out what he was doing wrong and how to fix it. He just watched Yuuri and tried to pretend that it was him riding it. They had completely different styles though and half the stuff he did wasn't transferable. Yuuri was a lot softer than he was, perhaps too soft, but he had a more technically correct seat over the fence. He just needed to take control a little more and push himself out of his comfort zone a bit.   
'Collect,' He called, mentally running through everything he would do to achieve the stride he was looking for. 'Sit deeper! Go with him, not against him. That's it, now push for the long one there!'  
Eros took off slightly before Yuuri anticipated it, but they made the strides planned and Victor was satisfied with their efforts.   
'Good. Yuri, your turn,' He needn't've said it because Yuri was already coming up fast and flat. 'Pick your horse up! Impulsion, not speed. I want you to put three strides in both.'   
Yuri ignored everything he said and somehow, against all odds, managed to put one stride in both gaps.   
'I'm going to wring his neck,' Victor growled to Yuuri. 'Before he breaks it himself taking another stride like that.'   
'Does she always do that?' Yuuri watched as Agape began having what looked like a fit, kicking out repeatedly.   
'Oh yeah. Big on bucking, that one. Fits right in with Eros, huh?'   
'He's not so bad,' Yuuri reached forwards and patted his horse on the neck, feeling a rush of something akin to affection for the first time. True, Eros had nothing on Vicchan, but he was quite the character and it was hard not to find him amusing when he wasn't acting up or you were looking back on him being a brat.   
'Put them up,' Yuri demanded when he'd finally managed to wrestle Agape into a half-walk. 'She's bored. I'm bored.'   
Victor rolled his eyes and made a big show of being irritated, but he duly knocked them up a few holes and hoped it would make both Yuri and Agape back off a bit and take a more sensible stride. How wrong he was; they did exactly the same, except this time they took out a stride on the way in as well.   
'How is that even possible?' He groaned, starting to get dizzy from the amount of circles Yuri was having to turn to slow down. 'Yuuri, off you go.'  
'I have to jump that too?' It wasn't a ridiculous height, probably somewhere around a metre for the first and 1.10 for the second, if not lower, but it was still intimidating to him. On the way in, he let the height distract him and his eyes locked onto the fences themselves rather than beyond them, meaning he got in deep to the first and as a result stumbled through the rest of it, knocking the last and rolling it out of the cups. Frustrated with himself, he waited for Victor to put it back into place and took himself round to repeat the exercise. This time, his head cleared and he could really see the strides he wanted to take. Unfortunately, he and his horse were not seeing eye to eye and again, Eros chipped in at the first and this led to a mad leap for the second, then a cat leap over the third.   
'Don't worry about it,' Victor told him, adjusting the placing poles a little. 'He's just seeing what he can get away with, you did nothing wrong coming into it. He chipped the first time so he did it again, then you didn't regain your posture until after the jumps.'   
Yuuri couldn't agree more. Basically, he sucked at riding and Eros was taking advantage of that fact. 

After training was finally over and Yuuri had sponged off a dishearteningly savage Eros, Victor announced that it was high time they just spent time together as friends so that they could develop the coach/student relationship. Yuuri felt that this demeaned the friendship side of it if he made it into a coach/student kind of thing, but then what did he know? He wasn't exactly swamped with friends. He hadn't even talked to Phichit in three months. Phichit was too busy with his meme pages, which were disturbingly gaining popularity quickly. His trademark was making memes of the more well-known showjumpers. There were plenty of Victor, and even one or two of Yuuri.   
In lieu of this decision, Yuuri and Victor ended up sat in his room on his bed, looking through old albums of photographs from Yuuri's childhood. They were mostly him flapping about on diddy little ponies at Hasetsu Castle, learning to ride (and fall off). Victor loved them all, laughing at the ones where he was sulking or pulling a face, which was pretty much every single one. He'd been quite the opinionated child. A particular favourite of his mother's was one of him at his first proper Hanami, petals crammed in his mouth as he cried because his two-year-old mind had thought it a good idea at the time. Victor laughed for ages when he saw it, taking a picture to make sure he had his own copy.   
'You were such a cute baby,' He remarked as they came to the end of the pictures and Yuuri slotted the albums back onto his shelf.   
'What about you?' He asked, sitting back down and seeing how Victor tensed up suddenly. It was strange to see him so easily upset because he was a champion at keeping his composure.   
'My parents were very pushy with my riding. Eventually I couldn't take it anymore and I moved in with Mila for a while. As soon as I was able to, I started living on my own.'  
'Oh, that's awful. I'm sorry,' Yuuri knew he was doing the one thing he hated most- apologising for other people's tragedies that he couldn't help- but he didn't know what else to say. His family had always been there for him, supportive to the max but never pushy or pressurising. He couldn't imagine what it must have been like for a young Victor to have things so bad at home his own coach had taken him in.   
'It's fine. They're kind of disappointed in me for going into showjumping.'  
'Oh?'  
'Very into classical dressage. That's where I learnt it all.'  
Yuuri had been watching Victor's dressage all week- it was a wondrous sight to behold. Piaffe, passage, one-time tempis, everything. He had such an enviable connection with Aria and his other dressage horse, Magiya. He could easily ride for his country from what Yuuri had seen.   
'If you're so highly trained, why don't you compete in dressage?' He felt compelled to query, because it was hypnotic to watch and he couldn't believe that Victor was only showjumping when he was so equally talented at dressage.   
'I wanted to deny stereotypes.'  
'What stereotype?'  
'I'm gay, Yuuri.'  
Yuuri pretended he wasn't choking on his own tongue, but he'd never been much of an actor and his violent reaction must have been very visible.   
'Sorry, it's just a shock,' He forced a smile. Why was he feeling so weirdly happy about this? It had to be because of the representation- there wad a distinct absence of LGBT+ people in the equestrian community. Not due to any form of attraction.   
'Don't worry, I'm not going to make a move on you or anything.'  
'Uhh, good,' He mumbled, not wanting to look up in case he felt the same butterflies he'd always felt when he looked into Victor's eyes. It was not a crush! It was pure admiration on a platonic level. He definitely did not want Victor to make a move on him or kiss him or feel how solid his muscles- he took a deep breath and pinched the bridge of his nose. He was thinking too much into this. Victor being gay changed nothing. He was still just a friend. Maybe even a good friend.   
'Family secret though,' Victor whispered, searching his eyes for any sign of repulsion or absence of acceptance. 'You won't tell, will you?'  
'Of course not,' Yuuri shook his head, and Victor noticed that he was suddenly scared to look him in the eye again.   
'Good. Anyway, do you think you'll be ready to compete the week after next? I know it's soon, but there's a really good show nearby and I think it would be a good starter for you. Plus, I'm bored of not competing and Yuri must be too.'   
'If you think I'm ready.'  
'I do, you're starting to get it. In two weeks' time, you'll be perfectly capable.'  
'Whatever you say...'

 

Yuuri entirely regretted agreeing to compete the second his alarm went off at 4am two weeks later. He growled to himself and leant over his bed to poke Victor, who was not a morning person in the slightest.   
'Let me sleep,' Victor groaned, but Yuuri had learnt to be insistent with him. He shook him until he reluctantly sat up, rubbing his eyes and cracking his knuckles like he did every morning, much to Yuuri's disgust. He disappeared to the bathroom to get dressed and Yuuri was left to his own devices for a few minutes while he pulled on his clothes in a stupor of exhaustion. He almost walked out the door with his shirt on inside out and wouldn't have noticed it had Victor not pointed it out. It wasn't until he'd fixed them both up a coffee that either one of them said good morning.   
'You need feeding up,' Victor told him. 'To give you energy for the day ahead.'  
He nodded and fixed up his usual breakfast of natto and white rice, grabbing rice porridge for Victor since he loved it so much. Once it was steaming hot, he served it to him with a flourish.   
'Bon appetit, monsieur,' He bowed grandly, provoking a startled chuckle from the recipient of his decadent gestures.   
'Merci, mon petit choux,' Victor ruffled his hair and tucked in, gesturing for him to do the same. They ate quickly, right on schedule, and Yuuri washed up while Victor checked that everything was going to plan at Yuri's end.   
'We should get going,' He commented, checking his watch again. Yuuri dried his hands and they walked down to Victor's car with a businesslike stride. He put his foot down a bit to get to the yard, because apparently Yuri was a nightmare sometimes and they'd need to sort him out. When they arrived, Yuuri could see why. To begin with, he'd used black mane bands on his chestnut mare and added to that his plaits were catastrophically messy.   
'Go load up all the tack,' Victor sighed, undoing them all. 'I'll plait Fluffy for you.'   
'Use the black bands!' Yuri snapped at him.   
'Yuri, they look awful.'  
'No, they look cool!'   
'Get lost.'  
The mare pulled a hideous face, but allowed Victor to make a start on her mane.   
'Yuuri, you can plait, can't you?' He looked up from his work for a moment.   
'Yeah,' Yuuri shrugged nonchalantly. 'I guess. I can do my own, anyway.'  
'Good. Go make a start on that. Jakov is bringing the lorry around.'  
Eros' mane was so thick and wiry it was an absolute nightmare to plait and by the time Yuuri had finished his fingers were sore and his left index was even bleeding from his efforts. Apparently he'd lost track of time because just as he finished the tail Victor was loading up Aria. He cursed and threw Eros' navy show rug on, dragging him out to the car park quickly and hauling him up the ramp, which they then secured shut quickly and he let Yuri and Jakov drive off in the lorry. There wasn't enough space in the front for all four of them, and Victor had been kind enough to offer to drive there in his car, so Yuuri had wanted to stick with him to discuss tactics and strategies. Mostly, though, he had wanted to avoid being stuck in a little cabin for three hours with Yuri Plisetsky. He'd been a little nicer over the past two weeks but he still was a total liability when sat atop his horse- some things would never change, and Yuuri's blatant lack of respect for other riders was one of these things. He got back in the passenger seat, already suffering a little from competition nerves.   
'You're going to be just fine,' Victor told him, somehow always knowing when he was stressed. They still hadn't been able to make much time to hang out as friends over the two weeks since they last had, but they'd become a lot more comfortable with each other apart from Yuuri being painfully awkward at times. For some reason, he always found himself staring at Victor whenever his back was turned, convincing himself that there was nothing between them. And he was right. There was zero chemistry. Zilch. Nada. There was more chemistry in his old science textbooks. This was what he told himself every two seconds, especially when he caught his eyes drifting to Victor's ass every now and then. Wasn't it normal, though? Victor had been so casual about saying Yuuri's butt had shrunk, so it had to be normal to notice stuff like that. Just appreciating that he was muscled and fit didn't make him gay. If anything, Victor was the one person he could never have anything with because he was way too shy around him most of the time. He slept for most of the ride there to avoid conversation, and also he was shattered from such an early start and an eventful morning ensuing it. He awoke with a start when the car came to a jolting stop in a car park somewhere. They were at the show grounds already. Yuuri clambered out, still yawning and bleary-eyed, and they went in search of Victor's lorry together. As they walked through the lorry park, Yuuri could feel the stares they were getting. So this was what being Victor Nikiforov felt like. Everybody whispered and pointed, a few more daring individuals came to ask for a picture and Yuuri had to translate for him. Victor willingly paused to pose with each and every one of his fans, something Yuuri knew he would never have the patience for- if he had the dms in the first place, that was. Jakov had parked the lorry nice and out of the way so that they wouldn't get too many eyes on them, but they couldn't escape it when they had tacked up and were walking down the the warmup ring. Yuuri and Yuri entered in the 1.15m for a gentle warmup and Yuri was finishing off with a 1.20. Victor was sticking around for an hour or two to compete in the 1.30, but nothing at this show was going to be very full up. It was more about experience.   
'Isn't that Katsuki Yuuri?' Somebody nudged their friend, and Yuuri heard similar every time he passed by anybody, although all too frequently it would be Victor's or Yuri's name instead of his. He tightened his grip on the reins as they were let into the warmup ring, always having held a cold fear in his heart for it. He never got to warm up fully because he was so awkward and shy about jumping and didn't have the guts to get bossy when he wanted to. It didn't help that Yuri had a menacing habit of cutting him off at every given opportunity, almost causing several accidents. Victor quickly intervened and ordered him to respect his competition, which only made him roll his eyes and go faster to try (in vain) to dodge between everybody. He ended up being first to go in, probably because the ringmasters were afraid he'd kill somebody and wanted rid of him. Yuuri pulled up to watch, Victor explaining to him that Yuri was a formidable opponent when he had his head in the game. Watching him and Agape thundering round the course was intimidating as ever, and he got a neat clear round in a time that would be hard to beat.   
'You go and jump something,' Victor told Yuuri after they'd congratulated Yuri on his round, to which he stuck his tongue out.   
Yuuri braved it and fought his nerves stemming from fear of warmup rings and fear of his horse trying to kill him combinant. He managed to jump three fences, keeping his eye on the ball as best as he could and making sure his leg was firmly underneath him. All the dressage had paid off because his balance and rhythm felt better by tenfold. Eros behaved himself relatively well, only cat leaping one of the three fences and bucking just twice, and once was because of the cat leap. His number was soon called and he felt his blood racing through his body, making his vision swim and his legs seize up.   
'Davai, Yuuri,' Victor yelled after him as he trotted into the main ring, and just like that he relaxed. He knew his course (he hoped) and he had learnt multiple methods of keeping the speed under control. Victor had made him vigorously plan out every stride, every turn, every check whilst walking the course beforehand, and he was now grateful without parallel for it. Eros had a bit of a moment going into canter where he wanted to run off, but Yuuri made himself fight down the urge to be pulled forwards and let him speed up, instead leaning further back and keeping his seat firmly planted in the saddle. He was not going to be pulled out of it by a bratty horse like this. He looked for his first fence, turned, and Eros quickly locked on. The stride was a little dodgy but for a first fence it was easy to get away with. He just had to concentrate on maintaining that rhythm. In the ring, Eros suddenly geared into competition mode. His head lowered, his strides shortened and became much more extravagant, but his mouth softened completely. Yuuri was shocked, because he would have thought it would be the other way round. The second fence, a meaty oxer, was perhaps the best jump they'd done as a pair so far. Spurred on by this, Yuuri closed his leg tighter and asked for yet more collection into jump number three, a very spacey vertical. Eros pinged over it like a gazelle, kicking out with his backend but not quite managing to unseat his rider. The round proceeded very well from there, and before he knew it Yuuri was approaching the final obstacle, which also happened to be one of their problem fences. A very tightly-strided related distance with a minor dog leg between them. He'd calculated four compact strides with Victor earlier, but coming into it he was tempted to go for three. Usually on a bouncy horse like Eros he would avoid long spots at all costs, but it was going so well for him that he felt it was only natural to take more of a risk rather than shorten it too much and receive an uncomfortable bunny hop. Eros reacted perfectly and gave him a perfect jump, really beginning to round up and think about a good bascule. It did take a little too long to pull up, but Yuuri was stunned by how well his round had gone. He scratched Eros' withers and trotted from the ring, where he was instantly accosted by Victor. He expected a telling-off for not sticking with his plan and putting in the long three rather than the short four, but instead Victor clapped him on the back and grinned widely at him.   
'You did a great job!' He enthused, his eyes bright. 'I thought you'd want to take that three.'  
'So why did you tell me to go for the four?'  
'I wanted to see how much you trust your own judgement, and apparently it's more than I thought. Since that went so well, I think it's time to strategise your jumpoff. Now, Yuri is going to go fast and hard so it's going to be tempting to just rely on speed.'  
'Isn't that the point of a jumpoff? Besides, I have speed, so why not use it?'  
'Because if you go too fast you'll get flat and knock everything. Concentrate on the accuracy of your turns and what we've been working on at home.'  
'Got it,' Yuuri pretended he'd listened to every word of that sentence. He'd been somewhat distracted by the rider in the ring, who was going so slowly that he was going to bite his nails to the quick from watching their approaches. The horse was practically taking off from a halt. 'Check out this horse.'  
'Painful,' Victor winced. 'I know I tell you to slow down, but if you ever go that slowly I'll come and beat you about with my crop.'   
He brandished his whip as a demonstration, smacking Yuuri on the shoulder playfully.   
'Ouch!' He giggled, rubbing the stinging patch of skin and wishing he had his own whip so that he could take sweet, sweet vengeance.   
'Looks like they're setting up for the jumpoff,' Victor pointed at the arena, where jumps were being shifted and Yuri was waiting to go in, his reins just inches long and Agape rearing almost vertically in excitement. He was let in once the course was ready, and the second the bell rang he was breaking the sound barrier, kicking like mad and flapping his arms wildly.   
'That kid forgets how to ride the second he gets in a show ring,' Victor looked like the frustration of watching this was a familiar friend to him. 'Oh look, and he's forgotten the course.'  
Yuuri watched Yuri's face of fury become one of slightly less fury, twisted with a twinge of panic.   
'Didn't he learn it?'  
'He can't remember a course to say his life. Don't worry, Jakov always steps in. There he is, pointing at the next fence, thank god.'  
'Isn't that outside interference?' Yuuri raised an eyebrow, seeing how Jakov was pointing fiercely at the next jump.   
'Everybody knows how terrible he is, so nobody ever comments on it.'  
Even despite forgetting the course halfway through, Yuri had an impossibly quick time and a second clear round. He would undoubtedly take first or place high. It was at least a whole minute, though, before he had managed to yank his horse out of a headlong gallop and by this point the next rider was getting irked.   
'You need to get your horse moving and in jumpoff mode,' Victor told him, picking up an active walk. 'Keep him calm. It might be a jumpoff, but you're still training.'  
'I know,' Yuuri rolled his eyes, having heard it all before. He trotted on and asked Eros for a canter, but when he got a gallop he had to tell him to canter.   
'Look at you getting handsy,' Victor laughed from across the arena as he lengthened Eros' canter to get a feel for how he wanted to take the jumps. 'Remember, you're on a a clever horse. He knows it's a jumpoff as well as you do, so he's going to go whether you like it or not. It's up to you to engage his hindquarters and stop him getting flat. Do you remember all your turns?'  
'I'll be fine!' Yuuri sighed, coming into a warmup fence and allowing Eros to potter over it with plenty of room. 'I think I need to go in now.'  
'Davai!'  
Yuuri hadn't ridden a jumpoff in two years and the notion of it was daunting, but he was feeling a lot more confident than he had been. The ring steward ushered him in and Eros went without asking, bounding into a high-stepping trot. Yuuri took a deep breath and nudged him into canter, making sure to sit right back and keep his wits about himself. The bell rang a split second before he anticipated it, meaning when Eros catapulted forwards he got a little too behind the movement. He caught up again but not in time to salvage the line he had planned for the first jump. Missing it cost him the inside turn for fence two, so instead he took it long but fast. He knew he shouldn't be going as fast as he was but he was a bit cocky after such an effortless first round and didn't see how it could fail. Like Victor had said, he had a clever horse. He could surely make it. It was a colossal, suspiciously full up oxer with a back rail that towered above the 1.20m limit, but he had faith that they could make it. He dug his heels into Eros' side a little more, but when he responded with a gleeful buck he took it away completely, suddenly realising how big the fence actually was. He loosened the contact a little too much and Eros ran with it, thundering towards the fence and Yuuri all at once forgot everything he'd been told about collection and most importantly not getting flat. Eros was going like a racehorse, and there was no possible way he was going to make it. Yuuri knew this even before he was launched full speed out of the saddle into the poles, a sickening crack sounding as he was hurled to the floor.   
'Fuck,' He muttered, lying there for a moment and staring up at the sky. 'That didn't work.'   
Perhaps a glorious comeback wasn't such a good idea after all. The paramedics were at his side within a minute, trying to load him onto a stretcher.   
'No, no, I'm fine,' He waved them away, standing up slowly and wincing as his ankle rolled back into place. Once he'd convinced the ambulance crew that he was fine, a pole-picker came forwards and handed him his horse, who was foaming at the mouth and steaming with sweat. 'Sorry.'   
He felt the need to apologise, because it was his fault after all. Now to face the music; Victor was storming towards him with a face as white as his show jodhpurs. This was going to be fun.


	7. Chapter 7

'What the hell were you thinking?' Victor berated him the second they were out of the way of prying eyes. 'You need to listen to me for once! For weeks now we've been training together and what do I tell you every day? Collection. Impulsion. Not just speed. Hell, I even told you before you went in! And what do you do? You let go completely before an oxer, expect your green horse to do all the work for you and don't even have the common decency to at least try to get over it or pull him out. Do you have no respect for your horse? Christ, do you have a death wish?'  
'I'm sorry!' Yuuri felt the tears beginning to flow and he wiped them away hurriedly, embarrassed enough without them. 'I didn't think-'  
'You're right, you didn't think. What the hell is wrong with you?'   
'Victor, that's enough,' Jakov said firmly, putting a hand on his shoulder. 'He made a mistake. It's his first show in two years, what did you expect?'  
Victor crumpled onto the fold-up mounting block, holding his head in his hands and taking a deep, shaky breath. Yuuri could see that this was a separate issue, and that he was probably just out of his mind with worry. It had been quite the fall he'd taken- he was lucky he never seemed to injure himself, because it could have ended up being serious.   
'I'm okay,' He sat down next to him, slipping an arm round his waist and leaning against him.   
'I'm sorry,' Victor sighed deeply and sat up, brushing his hair from his face and attempting a smile. 'I just got scared for a minute. Believe me, I've made much worse mistakes.'   
'Tell me about it,' Jakov grumbled.   
'My head hurts like a bitch, though,' Yuuri prodded the bruise forming on the side of his head. He flinched and the sharp pain made his mind go fuzzy.   
'Want me to kiss it better?'  
'Hmm,' Yuuri couldn't formulate a reply, his brain not quite connecting to his lips. Victor took this as an affirmative and pressed his lips to where it hurt, and though it just made it ache more Yuuri felt much better for it. He'd never quite understood the phrase until now. His lips were warm and Yuuri honestly couldn't fathom whether they were still there or not.   
'Much better,' He mumbled, barely coherent.   
'Uhh, Yuuri?' Victor elbowed him. 'Are you okay? You look a bit- Jesus!'  
He grabbed Yuuri as he crumpled to the floor, holding him up and telling Jakov to get the ambulance crew back. He came to quickly, but Victor made him sit on the mounting block and count the fingers he was holding up.   
'I think you're concussed,' He decided, and then the paramedics arrived and carted him off to get another checkover. He fretted over him so much that Jakov had to intervene again and halt his jitteriness in its tracks.   
'He's going to be fine,' He patted him on the shoulder. 'Just got a bump on the head.'  
'Not the best first show back,' Victor shook his head. 'I should probably go sort Yuri out. He's got another class in a minute.'  
'You stay here,' Jakov instructed, pointing at a confused-looking but conscious Yuuri. 'You won't be able to concentrate until you know he's okay.'   
'Thanks.'  
Jakov huffed and left him to his anxieties. 

The paramedics diagnosed Yuuri with nothing more than a spell of dizziness, most likely from shock rather than the fall itself, and after a few more prods around he was set free to go back to the lorry, where Victor made him sit down in the living compartment and have a hot cup of matcha tea.   
'Don't you have another class to get to?' He asked in between sips.   
'There's other shows,' Victor shrugged, putting a hand against his forehead for what must have been the fiftieth time that minute. 'For now, I'm going to sit here and look after you.'  
'Nooo,' Yuuri groaned. 'I ruined things, didn't I? I should've known coming back was a bad idea.'  
'Not at all. Your first round was perfect, you just got a bit overly confident coming into the jumpoff and then lost your nerve to that fence because you knew you had a bad approach. At least you knew!'  
'You said it yourself. What was I thinking? You need to go back to Russia and resume your normal life.'  
'No can do. I'm invested now. I even posted a picture on Instagram, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.'  
'You did?' Yuuri reached for his phone, unplugging it and noticing the second it flicked on that again he had ridiculous amounts of notifications- seventeen of which were texts from Phichit asking what the hell was going on in Japan. Victor had posted a picture of him in the first round, and he didn't half look awkward perched up there on such a large horse. He scrolled through some of the comments, most of which were in Russian, until he found some he could understand. They were pretty much all speculating on whether it was a huge comeback, there was a large argument about the horse was, and finally all the showjumpers Victor competed with were going mad. Cris Giacometti, for one, was blowing a blood vessel trying to gather together information so he could draw a conclusion as to what Victor thought he was doing. The main question that seemed to be flying round everybody's lips was whether Victor was continuing to compete, or just sticking to coaching. He made a mental note to call Phichit later or something, because now was not the time to be neglecting old friendships- he needed as many people by his side as possible in order to get through the next couple of months with reasonable sanity. For now though, he was perfectly happy to just relax in Victor's good company and drink his tea like nothing was wrong and he was doing just fine and dandy.   
'I'm really sorry about going off on you like that,' Victor said again, his expression one of pure regret. 'I wasn't thinking straight.'  
'It's fine, really. If you don't mind me asking, what was it really about?'  
'It's kind of embarrassing.'   
'You think you can be any more embarrassed than I am after today's performance?'  
'Good point,' Victor half laughed, but his eyes glazed over. 'I told you that I don't really have family. I like to think I've chosen my own family, and Yuuri... I know we've not known each other long, but you mean a lot to me. Like a younger brother.'  
Yuuri winced- did he just get brother-zoned? Not that he was interested... Or was he? Because he knew he sounded like he was. He decided to test it out a little, watch for fireworks above them or something. He plucked up some courage and leaned into Victor, who automatically wrapped his arms around him. There certainly weren't any fireworks; all he felt was warmth. He'd never been interested in anybody before, so he didn't really know what he was looking for. That said, it was nice and he didn't particularly feel anything negative for the idea other than the general opinion that unrequited feelings are no fun.   
'You guys are so gross,' Yuri snapped as he came barrelling in. 'Anyway. I won both classes and went to the presentation ceremony. We can go.'  
'Right,' Victor let me go and slowly rose to his feet, his knees cracking in the typical fashion of one who rides horses. 'Let's get these horses back.'

Yuuri barely got in the door before he was accosted by Phichit ringing him at least twenty times in succession.   
'Hi,' He picked up on the twenty-third, knowing he couldn't put it off any longer. 'I'll just be a minute, Victor.'  
Victor had been fretting over him nonstop since his fall, and he was no better once they got back to the house, keeping a watchful eye over him every second. Now though, he was polite enough to let him have some privacy, despite the anxious expression etched onto his face.   
'Yuuri, it's been forever!' Phichit admonished him subtly, but this didn't cut the cheer from his tone.   
'Sorry, there's been... Stuff,' He knew his excuse was pathetic and vague but he had nothing better.   
'You don't say. So?'  
'So what?'  
'Are you coming back? Is Victor your coach?'  
'Uh, yeah,' He braced himself for the explosion of excitement. It took Phichit a few seconds to stop gushing ecstatically about how happy he was.   
'Who's the horse?'  
'Eros. We found him at an auction, he's kinda... Well, he's a bit too much for the moment. I came off earlier.'  
'Ouch, did you hurt yourself?'  
'Hit my head, but I'll be fine. He stopped, but it was my fault for letting him get too fast. Went right onto the jump.'   
'Oh god, one of those falls. Are you doing FEI, then?'  
'I don't know. We haven't had that conversation yet.'  
'What's he like? Victor, I mean.'  
'He's nice- really big on dressage and that kind of thing. He's helped me a lot, though, even if it is awkward because I don't remember what happened at some awards ceremony where I-'  
'Where you got drunk and begged him to coach you!'  
'You too?'  
'Umm, everyone was there. I tweeted pictures, didn't you see them?'  
'I was a bit busy dealing with the Vicchan situation after that.'  
'I'm sorry, I shouldn't have brought that up. Let's talk about something else- what do you do with Victor outside of training? Considering you worship the ground he walks on, doesn't it get a bit awkward?'  
'Yeah, sometimes. We talk, but I'm busy a lot of the time.'  
'Still working for Takeshi and Yuuko?'  
'Yep. I'm probably gonna have to stop once I start properly competing again, but it's nice to have something to take my mind off of things.'  
'What do you need to take your mind off?'  
Yuuri considered what he could say. Did he trust Phichit? He hadn't really told him many secrets before so he didn't know how he was with them, but he had always been a trustworthy friend and they'd been close for a good while. There were several issues surrounding him, but only one was something Phichit could have any helpful input on. Unfortunately, it was the one Yuuri was least inclined to share with him- with anybody. He wanted to get it off his chest though, so when Phichit asked if he was still there he inhaled deeply and sat down on his bed.   
'There is this one thing,' He kept his voice quiet in case Victor or a member of his family was nearby and in a position that they might overhear something. 'What would you say if... I told you I think I'm into guys?'  
'I'd say that it's pretty obvious and everybody probably knows. Is that what you're telling me?'   
'Everybody knows?' Yuuri chuckled in disbelief. He didn't agree because Phichit was the only showjumper he ever spent much time with. 'I don't know. Yeah. And you're okay with it?'  
'Of course I am.'  
He took a sigh of relief and smiled.   
'Is there a specific guy?' Phichit asked, his words interrupted by a giggle. 'Perhaps with a name that rhymes with iktor ikiforov?'  
'What? No!'  
'So why are you only just realising it now?'  
'I don't know! Anyway, he's my instructor. I highly doubt he'd want anything like that.'  
'Can I make a meme?'   
'Do whatever you want,' Yuuri rolled his eyes, knowing Phichit couldn't be away from the internet for prolonged periods of time. 'I guess we'll talk later.'   
'Hmm? Oh, bye.'  
He hung up and put his phone down to charge for a while. He'd promised Yuuko that he would do evening feeds for her, so he changed into normal clothes and cycled down to the yard, much to Victor's disapprobation. The way he saw it, the paramedics had said he was okay so he was fine to work. Victor strongly disagreed, but it wasn't really up to him and besides, Yuuri had made a promise that he intended to keep. He stacked his bike against a fence and went to make the feeds. The horses' heads all immediately popped out, some kicking at their doors in anticipation. He scooped the correct feeds into each bowl, then followed up with linseed oil and sugarbeet and whatever combination of supplements they had. There was something soothing about the simplicity of the task. He had a rhythm with it, everything was organised and neat and it was impossible for him mess up. He was surprised by how minimalist Victor's horses feeds were- he would have expected his top showjumpers to have every available supplement above the 50000¥ threshold. He fed the eagerly awaiting horses and filled up all the water buckets whilst he waited for them to finish. In the end, he stuck around for a few hours, finding he didn't particularly want to go home. He had a lot to think about, and there was no chance for that back at the house because Victor was there and he was primarily what he needed to sort out.   
Did he like him or not? A difficult question to answer, but a significant one. The fact that he was having to ask himself this suggested he probably did, but then there was the question of what he wanted to do about it. The revelation that he could feel something above platonic levels for Victor was delirious enough in itself, but the idea of having to do something about it was worse by far. He was well aware he'd never have the guts to breathe a word of it, nor would he ever be able to initiate anything. One positive of the situation was that at least Victor was gay, because if he wasn't it would make the situation a whole lot worse. Maybe that had something to do with it though- perhaps he was just overthinking that and it had led him to believe that he was attracted to him. He ran his hands through his hair in frustration, resisting the urge to ram his head into a wall. He didn't want this! He had never asked for Victor to come coach him in the first place, much less to bloody fall for him like a fool. He wasn't surprised though- anybody could fall for a man like him with ease. His charming smile, his incredible personality, his chiselled jawline, his brilliant eyes and oh god he needed to stop himself from thinking like this. By the time he did make it home, it was pitch black outside and almost the next morning. He didn't often stay out this late, and his mother looked anxious when he walked through the door. Her and Victor were sat at the table like they'd been waiting there for hours.   
'Stop worrying about me,' He told his mother, waving at Victor, who stood up and still looked concerned. 'What is it?'  
'There's something you might want to see,' Victor handed him his phone, which was open on a hashtag on Instagram. Yuuri's heart filled with fear when he began to see what had been reposted almost a hundred times. He looked from Victor to his mother, then announced that he was going upstairs. He passed Victor's phone back and dashed up to retrieve his own, googling his name and looking at the top three results that were speculating on a certain image Phichit had posted with a certain caption. Basically, vicious rumours were circulating in regards to his sexuality. He instantly dialled up Phichit's number, tracing it back to the original post and seeing that it had hundreds of comments. It had only been up for half an hour, but the damage was done. There was no way he was coming back to showjumping now.   
'Why did you post that?' He gasped down the phone, feeling a panic attack coming on. The familiar sense of a coldness creeping down his spine signified that he had just moments before he lost all ability to function, let alone speak.   
'You gave me your blessing! I said can I go make a meme and you told me do whatever.'  
'I thought you meant you wanted to stop taking so you could go post something, not tell everybody I'm gay!'   
'It doesn't even explicitly say you're gay.'  
'Yuuri Katsuki, never trust him as an official photographer, all he'll do is zoom in on the men as they jump away from the camera,' He read aloud from the post. 'Christ, just take it down and tell everybody it was a joke! Tell them it's not true!'  
'Wait, you're not gay?'  
'I am, but I told you thinking you wouldn't tell anybody. You told the entire world!'  
'I'm sorry, it was an accident!'  
'An accident is falling over, this is a massive mistake. Look, just take it down and say I'm not gay.'   
'Okay, give me a minute.'   
'I have to go,' Yuuri's body was beginning to freeze up and he could barely manage to hang up the phone and chuck it across the room so he didn't see the notifications. He burrowed into his bed and pulled his duvet around himself, sticking his head under his pillow. After a while, Victor knocked on the door and came to sit at the end of his bed.   
'I'm sorry this has happened,' He offered, and Yuuri just squirmed further into his covers.   
'Leave me alone,' He mumbled. 'I'm a cocoon of sadness.'  
'Look, it'll blow over.'  
'It's scary now. I don't want to compete again.'  
'Don't you dare give up now! I'll come out. It'll create a diversion and distract everybody's attention from you long enough that they'll forget it.'   
'No, they'll be worse to you because everybody knows who you are.'  
'I can take it better than you. Besides, I already told you that you mean a lot to me and I will do anything to protect you.'  
Yuuri emerged from his den and scooted up beside Victor.   
'You don't have to do that,' He murmured. 'I talked to Phichit and he's taking it down and telling everyone it was a joke and untrue.'  
'Are you sure? The rumours will still stick, you know. I have to come out eventually, it may as well be now when it's helping you.'  
'I can't ask you to do that for me.'  
'You're not! I'm doing it whether you like it or not,' Victor took his phone from his pocket and pulled up instagram. 'Here, I'll do it now.'  
He typed a short sentence underneath an innocent photo of him standing with Aria, then pressed post. Yuuri was stunned by the ease with which he did this, and couldn't believe there were people in the world that brave. It made him want to do something daring himself.   
'Before you get annoyed with Phichit, there's something I ought to tell you,' He swallowed down his fear and told himself Victor wouldn't mind. 'It's true.'  
'What?'  
'What he said.'   
'That you'd be a bad photographer?'  
'That I'm gay.'  
'Oh,' Victor's eyebrows shot up, and this was the first time Yuuri had seen him really caught off guard. 'Great! I mean, that's fine. Good for you.'   
Yuuri frowned, slightly perturbed by this strange reaction, but let it be. He realised now that telling Victor probably wasn't the best idea, because now he'd end up reading into everything so much worse. Also, Victor would probably be a little uncomfortable around him from now on. He would never again try to be brave, because he always just scared himself more. It was much better to stay in his comfort zone, never to step outside of it again.


	8. Chapter 8

Yuuri knew Victor had done what he'd done in good faith, but it turned out it hadn't helped at all. The stuff he ended up reading the next day was even scarier than the attention he'd been given before. Now, instead of speculating on him being gay, everybody was making wild accusations of Victor jetting off to Japan to commence a whirlwind affair with his new student. If last night's problems had been difficult to weather, today's were positively catastrophic. He woke up to a barrage of private messages on every social media he had asking about it, and all he wanted to do was roll over and cry. Victor quickly put out a very professional statement and the rumours quickly had their necks snapped, but they were still there. Not believed, but the fact was people had for a short while thought that they were together and this was bound to make the atmosphere uneasy between them. They didn't really speak when Victor drove them down to the yard, and it was only when Yuuri was on Eros that Victor began to talk. He had to, because they'd taken a massive step in the wrong direction. Yuuri was barely on for a second before Eros was broncing madly, clearly trying to get him off.   
'Sit up!' Victor yelled. 'Kick him forwards.'  
Yuuri's confidence was below ground level and he really didn't want to put his leg on, especially since that had been the reason he'd fallen off- too much leg. Instead he gripped with his knees and panicked, allowing Eros to pretty much do what he wanted.   
'Yuuri, pull him damn head up and kick him on!' Victor repeated, frustrated from watching it happen time and time again. Eventually it got so wearing that he picked up a lunge whip from the side of the arena and cracked it in the horse's direction. He startled and cat leaped, but at least there was forwards movement. Yuuri clung on as Eros began to canter round quite of his own accord, his head flinging up and down and his tail streaming.   
'Victor, stop terrorising my worst-paid worker!' Yuuko called from the sidelines. Yuuri gave her a thumbs up, grateful for an ally in his cause, which was that he did not deserve to be chased around like a beginner on the lunge.   
'I'm terrorising the horse,' Victor pointed out, but he left off. 'Okay, that's enough for today. We'll give him a few days off to cool down.'  
Yuuri sighed in relief and jumped off, happy to be hitting the ground of his own volition for once, then led Eros back to his stable.   
Victor decided to play with him a bit, wanting to cheer him up after such a disheartening lesson. Besides, he kind of just wanted to flirt freely with him under the guise of trying to make him smile.   
'Nothing like sixteen hands between your legs, huh?' He followed him into his stable, laughing at his own joke.   
'It's a lot of horse,' Yuuri agreed, not really getting it. All things said, he was pretty naïve.   
'I personally love to have powerful movement beneath me,' Victor knew this one was totally transparent and if Yuuri didn't get it he was out of his mind. Thankfully, this time he sniggered as he undid the girth.   
'Are you flirting with me?' He smirked, returning the joke.   
'Why, do you want me to?'   
Suddenly it became a little less innocent and Yuuri went red, removing Eros' bridle and dunking his bit in the water bucket to clean it off.   
'No,' He mumbled, pretending to be concentrating on tucking his girth through his stirrups and lifting the saddle off of his horse's back. Victor took his tack for him, not saying a further word. Yuuri felt like he'd spoken out of turn at some point or done something wrong because the atmosphere between them had quickly become weird. He had to ask what was wrong- he owed Victor that much. He wanted him to succeed so badly, and if they were to have a good coach/student relationship, he needed to uphold his end of the bargain and keep things smoothed over between them. He left Eros to cool off for a minute and went to catch Victor in the tack room.   
'Did I do something?' He was aware he sounded more than a little pathetic as he asked this, unaided by the tremor in his voice.   
'What?' Victor looked up. He looked confused- of course he looked confused, Yuuri had just been reading into things too much and now he looked like an idiot.   
'I'm sorry. I'm being stupid,' He sat down on a tack box.   
'No, I got distracted. I'm sorry,' Victor crouched down in front of him. 'How are you feeling, by the way?'  
'Hmm?'  
'Your head,' He tilted his chin upwards with his fingers, then brushed his thumb over the bruise on the side of his head. Yuuri met his eyes with bated breath, and he wondered briefly if Victor was going to kiss him. It felt like he was stuck in some ridiculous cheesy romance film, staring into the eyes of the man he'd so long idolised. He wanted to pull away, say something, but he hadn't the bodily autonomy to do a thing other than gaze into those cerulean eyes.   
Victor wanted nothing more in that moment than to kiss Yuuri, but to scare him would only serve as a bump in the road for the progression of their relationship. Instead, he settled for stroking his cheek before standing up quickly.   
'I have to teach Yuri. You want to come with?'  
'Sure,' Yuuri looked more than a little giddy. He found his feet and walked after Victor, enjoying walking behind him slightly too much.   
Yuri was already in the ring, an impatient expression on his sour face and Agape mirroring this by stamping at the ground irritably. Yuuri sat on a mounting block in the arena and observed Victor trying to control the frenetic kid, shouting at him in fast Russian and waving his arms around manically. It was hilariously theatrical, like something from a comedy skit, and he couldn't help giggling at the show.   
'Can you help me put up a course?' Victor asked him, trying to distract him from laughing before Yuri tried to mow him down. He stood up and helped him to drag a few wings into the arena, setting up a tight, very technical course.   
'I'm hoping this will slow him down,' Victor commented as they carried some poles together. 'Either that, or he'll go insane and get worse.'   
'Are you bitching about me?' Yuri screamed as he cantered a wide circle.   
'Well, the tongue is the strongest muscle in the body,' Yuuri shrugged, a grin inching across his face. He probably shouldn't be antagonising Yuri Plisetsky, but god did he enjoy it.   
'Wanna fight?' Victor winked, and he spluttered with laughter, dropping the pole.   
'Stop pushing my buttons,' He warned in good humour, picking it up again but totally prepared to drop it on Victor's toes.   
'Do you have a down button?'  
Yuuri dropped it instantly, and Victor howled in both pain and laughter as it landed on his feet.   
'Do you two mind?' Yuri spat, pulling up beside them. 'While you two may be content to stare into each others' eyes all day and try to get into each others' pants, you owe me a lesson.'  
'What?' Yuuri's eyes snapped wide open. 'We're not-'  
'Of course you're not,' He rolled his eyes, kicking Agape on and shaking his head. 'I'll just get Jakov to teach me. You go find him.'  
'Yuri, I can-' Victor began, but the look on Yuri's face said it all, so he trailed off. Yuri didn't want the two of them near him, not as a pair anyway.   
'Maybe it's best if I go,' Yuuri suggested.   
'No. We'll find Jakov, he can teach Yuri, and you and I can take some time off.'  
Yuuri didn't think Victor knew what time off meant. They'd worked nonstop on riding, tactics, planning an extensive show season, never really putting aside much time for themselves. Yuuri made matters worse by always offering to help Yuuko, which took up his remaining free time outside of that.   
'Do you have anything specific in mind?' He asked as they walked down the row of stables together, Victor looking out for Jakov.   
'Not really,' He shook his head and they gradually slowed down until they came to a stop by Aria's stable so Victor could pet her. 'I know she doesn't seem like much.'  
'Are you kidding? She won you individual gold at the Olympics.'  
'I'm surprised you say that. Everybody else is so critical- they say she's only a winner because I ride her. Do you think that's true?'  
'To an extent,' Yuuri shrugged, catching Victor's doleful expression. 'Because without a good rider, no horse can make it that far. That said, they have to be naturally clever and good at jumping to compete at such a high level. Without a good head, they'd cave under the pressure or not understand what you're asking, don't you think?'  
'Precisely! I just hate how everybody looks at her and thinks she's stupid.'  
Aria replied by tossing her head and banging against the side of the door, spooking herself and almost slipping over as she knocked her water bucket over.   
'Yeah, can't see it myself,' Yuuri remarked drily, not usually one to tease, but Victor just laughed and righted the bucket, handing it to him over the door. Yuuri placed it underneath the hose and filled it up again, waiting for Victor to come and help him carry it. Together, they lifted it up and hauled it to Aria's stable. She spooked again as they brought it in, somehow alarmed to see the same thing that she'd been drinking out of for weeks. Victor sighed and patted her before they left her to her ways. They found Jakov speaking in halting Japanese to Yuuko, discussing a turnout regime that would allow Victor's horses more grazing time as he thought they'd lost weight.   
'Jakov, Yuri wants you,' Victor said this in English with deference to Yuuri's inability to speak any Russian.   
'Why?' His gruff voice was a stark contrast to Victor's dulcet tones. 'Did you piss him off?'  
'No, I think he was annoyed that I was talking to Yuuri.'  
'Yuuri was with you? I can't blame him, then.'  
'Don't be like that,' Victor rolled his eyes and put a comforting arm round an offended looking Yuuri's shoulder.   
'Yuuri's not the problem,' Jakov gave them a pointed look. 'You two are just too suffocating for him.'  
'What?' Victor arched an eyebrow, dropping his arm.   
'You're not...?' Jakov looked more confused then Victor, then something must have dawned on him because an expression of sudden realisation came over him. 'Ah. Yes, I'll go teach him.'   
'Thanks,' Victor narrowed his eyes at him, trying to figure out what was going on in that calculating head of his.   
They resumed walking aimlessly, neither one of them saying a word, until they came to the fields. All the horses out during the day had been brought in by now, so they could go into one and keep walking.   
'Are we just going to keep walking until we come to the sea?' Yuuri quipped, and Victor halted in his tracks.   
'Well, here is good enough,' He shrugged.   
'For what?'  
'Hah, well I did have something planned but now it comes down to it I don't have the guts.'  
'What is it?'  
Victor looked down, and Yuuri had never once seen him bashful before so this was a novel experience that he wanted to remember as long as he lived. The slight pink tinge colouring his cheeks, the length and thickness of his eyelashes now that his gaze had dropped. His hand reached out of its own accord and brushed a stray strand of hair from his face. Victor looked up again, a smile painting his face.   
'Hi,' He whispered, and Yuuri giggled at how coy he was being. He was completely helpless stood there in a field with Victor Nikiforov of all people being all shy and cute.   
'Hey,' He breathed back, frozen in place. 'It's nice out here, isn't it?'   
'What?' Victor chuckled softly; it was just like Yuuri to kill the moment by talking about the weather.   
'Now that there's no horses out here, although that would be fine too,' Yuuri could feel his mouth moving but he wasn't in control of what was coming out of it. He was anxious-rambling. 'I mean, not just the weather. It's a really pretty place-'  
'Yuuri,' Victor took his hand. 'Shh. Stop worrying.'  
'Worried? I'm not worried! I'm totally fine, I-'  
Victor stepped forwards and stopped his lips with a kiss, his hands cupping his cheeks and holding him there for a moment before stepping away as quickly as he had to him. Yuuri's cheeks were endearingly red and he couldn't speak for a good thirty seconds, instead just standing there, mouth agape and looking incredibly flustered.   
'Say something,' Victor appeared anxious for the first time- it was a moment of firsts for both of them.   
'I don't know,' Yuuri scuffed his feet, looking around to make sure nobody was watching.   
'You don't know what?'  
'What to say!'  
'Well now I just feel like an idiot.'  
Yuuri felt bad for making Victor feel like that, especially because he was such an unflappable person, but his brain had flatlined and his lips were tingling far too much to say anything. He knew of a much better way to put them to use, anyway. He pressed them to Victor's for another half-second, inexplicably relieved that he didn't have to worry himself sick over unrequited feelings.   
'Wait, are you sure about this?' He asked as he came away, unable to help questioning it- Victor wasn't just out of his league, he was out of his galaxy. He moved away and straightened out his shirt, coughing awkwardly.   
'Yes,' Victor rolled his eyes. 'More importantly, what do you want out of this? I don't want to overstep any boundaries.'  
'I don't know,' Yuuri could never be the one leading something like this, not where Victor was concerned. Saying anything at all made him feel like he was asking for too much. He didn't know what he wanted, or what Victor wanted, so he didn't want to be the one making the decision.   
'How about we just see where it takes us?' Was what Victor suggested, and that sounded perfect to him. 'Have some fun, and if it doesn't work out then there's no need to be awkward about it because at least we tried.'  
'Right. And what will we tell people?'  
'We don't have to tell anyone- maybe it's best not to. You got so stressed when that thing with Phichit happened, I don't think you need that when you're competing internationally so soon.'  
They'd decided Yuuri's first international show would be in three weeks' time- although soon, it was the first leg of the FEI and it was of utmost importance that he be in it. Besides, Victor was going and so was Yuri, meaning leaving Yuuri behind would be unfair. That was how they put it, anyway. Yuuri had railed against it, trying in vain to persuade them that he really didn't need to go and would be perfectly chipper without them. Victor called the shots, though, so he was signed up and supposed to be all ready to go. It was going to be an intense three weeks of training, and now with Eros having a few days off and Yuuri having mini panic attacks every time he got on it didn't look like so much of a bright future after all. It had come on in such a rush and the prospect of failure was dizzying. He hadn't officially announced his return to competing yet, but then he didn't see the need to because he hadn't been missed. He'd come back and people wouldn't believe him when he said he'd been gone for two years. He'd never really been a person of interest, but perhaps standing by Victor's side he had a chance- though it felt distinctly wrong to be leeching off of his fame. He didn't really know how they'd fare away at shows, or at home for that matter. It felt like a huge jump from friends to this. At least it didn't have a specific name. Thanks to Victor's cautious wording, he didn't feel like anything was being expected of him and thus there wasn't much pressure on him to do the right things and be totally comfortable with everything. He had no idea what he was doing, but he felt like Victor was much in the same boat as he was. As far as he knew, and he knew a startling amount about him, Victor had never had a serious girlfriend or boyfriend. Obviously they weren't at that level of commitment yet, but the point still stood that they were both inexperienced in affairs of this nature. This meant having fun and messing around was the best way to go at first so that they could figure out what they wanted without any awkwardness, though he knew there would be some on his side purely because he was just an awkward person. Nevertheless, the prospect of it was both daunting and exhilarating, regardless of its unserious nature. This was just what he needed- a little fun to alleviate some stress. Victor could do that for him (not that he hadn't done so already in many ways) and this may have been the most incredible thing to ever happen to him. Victor Nikiforov wanting to play around with him, and not just with his life this time but in a romantic sense. He kind of loved the idea of it, even if he was shitting himself because he was clueless about what might be constituted messing around. That was the beauty of it all- they could decide that together. If they tried something and it didn't work, they'd drop it. Easy as plum pie, right?


	9. Chapter 9

Yuuri kept sneaking glances at Victor from across the table, and each time their eyes met he felt an electric jolt course through his veins that certainly hadn't been there before. It was probably in light of the new developments in their relationship. His mother had invited Yuri Plisetsky for dinner, and he didn't miss a trick. Every time Yuuri's eyes wondered to Victor, he rolled his eyes as dramatically as possible, sometimes adding in a theatrical sigh for variation. When dinner was over, Yuuri offered to wash up because his poor mother had had to cook dinner for two guests and she deserved a good rest. She was grateful for this and accepted graciously, bustling off to sit down and listen to the radio.   
He hummed softly as he washed up, his hands aching from the hot water and his mind full of static. Victor stood and watched him as usual, his expression incalculable but gentle and his body slouched against the counter. He looked across at him, catching his eye and blushing, looking down again hurriedly to concentrate on the last of the dishes. He was so distracted that when he went to put the final glass down, he set it on the marble counter a little too hard and it smashed in his hands, slicing open the inside of his palm. He sucked in a breath through his teeth and immediately thrusted his hand under the tap, wincing when the water ran hot.   
'Hey, how bad is it?' Victor took his hand and turned it over in his own, inspecting the decent sized gash for himself. 'Do you have a first aid kit?'  
'Cupboard over there, top shelf,' Yuuri was a little caught off guard by the fact that his hand was bleeding profusely and he really couldn't afford to be so clumsy when he was competing so soon. He'd certainly had much worse injuries and it wasn't going to let it stop him doing anything, but though superficial and pathetic it would get in the way when he was trying to carry buckets and other such manual chores. Victor made him sit down on the counter as he wiped the cut with antiseptic wipes, making him flinch, and bandaged it up tightly.   
'You won't die,' Victor told him, kissing the bandaged hand and dropping it. 'Which is definitely a positive.'   
Yuuri sighed heavily and went to clean up the broken glass, sweeping it all into the bin and putting away all the dishes he had managed to keep intact.   
'You seem stressed,' Victor put his head on his shoulder, and Yuuri sighed, closing his eyes and allowing himself to relish in it for a brief moment.   
'Just thinking.'  
'Oh?' Victor draped his hands round his waist, swaying him gently from side to side. 'About what?'  
'This and that. Competing mostly.'  
'Let's do something relaxing then. We can watch a film.'  
'But what about-'  
'Nope. You need time off as well as your horse.'  
Yuuri had been planning to go back to the yard and help Yuuko with some odd jobs, but for once he was glad to have a little time to wind down after a stressful few weeks. He leaned back into Victor, inhaling deeply and taking the strain off of his aching muscles while he could.   
'I'm going now so-' Yuri's voice disrupted their moment, and Yuuri leapt forwards and whipped round to see him stood in the doorway with his arms folded across his chest obstinately. 'Whatever. Ugh. See you tomorrow.'  
Yuuri ducked his head in shame and mooched off up the stairs to hide, whereas Victor just laughed and waved the angry Russian boy off. He then removed himself to Yuuri's room, where he found him idly scrolling through some movies on his laptop. He crawled onto his bed and slipped an arm round his waist, cuddling up to him and giggling at how shocked he was.   
'What about that one?' He pointed to an ancient western movie, and Yuuri scoffed at him.   
'Are you serious? That's your kind of thing?'  
'Yes! What's wrong with that?'  
'Next you're going to suggest Brokeback Mountain.'  
'Don't need that- we can just reenact it ourselves.'  
Yuuri went bright red and Victor realised that he truly was as naive as he seemed. He couldn't help teasing him when he was like this, so he put a casual hand on his thigh, making him stutter and cover his face with his hands. His fingers creeped a little higher to evoke a soft sound that widened his eyes. Yuuri shoved his hand away, displaying his best impression of a beetroot.   
'Let's just watch the stupid film,' He grumbled, clicking on it and grudgingly allowing Victor to snuggle back up against him. The movie itself wasn't as awful as he had been expecting- not that he noticed much of it, thanks to Victor inching closer whenever he got the chance- but he would never enjoy westerns. Firstly, he'd never ridden western and couldn't think of a situation in which he might. Secondly, what was supposed to be so interesting about some hench men pretending to be all macho by shooting at stuff and riding awfully? Even the better moments made him wince and the worse moments had him looking away from the gaping mouths of the poor horses. The credits just didn't want to roll and he was stuck watching the insipid film about archaic practices of gun-slinging maniacal cowboys. He couldn't even tell who the protagonist was meant to be, since everybody was shooting at everyone and they all looked the same to him anyway. Despite all this, it was an enjoyable experience. Victor was so engrossed and it was adorable to watch his face changing with each scene, more specifically the way he got all bubbly and excited when his favourite actor came on screen. His periwinkle eyes shone with an unparalleled brilliance and he clenched his fists around Yuuri's shirt, pulling him closer and closer. At this point it wasn't even flirting, just an overflow of giddy elation.   
'You're actually fangirling,' Yuuri whispered the next time it happened, and Victor looked at him in horror.   
'No, I'm not!' He religiously denied it, letting go of his shirt, which he had been gripping so tightly it had all but been torn apart. 'I'm n-'  
'It's really sweet.'  
'Oh. You think?' Victor had never been called sweet before. Handsome, sexy, talented, sure, but never sweet. He wasn't sure how to feel about it; he'd always been seen as this semi-unapproachable sex god with a permanent seductive smirk, never the kind of person one would associate with 'sweet'. He saw the way the media portrayed him and how the girls zoomed in on inappropriate areas of his pictures, and he loved it. He basked in the glow of attention he got from it. Sweet, though? Coming from Yuuri's lips, he felt in higher regards than ever before. This was a different side of his personality coming out, one that he didn't allow many people to see because he was so obsessed with keeping his reputation spick and span. A weird fluttering feeling tickled against his ribcage and he wondered what could be causing such an odd sensation. Perhaps he was sick, or maybe it was the 'butterflies' people always wrote and sung and talked about. Was Yuuri giving him butterflies? From the first moment he'd seen him, riding Vicchan in a small scale international show and crying with happiness when he got a clear round, he'd gotten this weird tight feeling in his chest like something was sucking his lungs together. This sense of tingling was entirely new, however, and something very different. He continued to stare at the screen but now he was watching Yuuri grin like an idiot in the reflection.   
'Stop being so cute, I'm trying to watch it!' He complained, prodding his dimples.   
'Me? Cute?'  
'The cutest.'  
Yuuri giggled bashfully, as if to prove Victor's point. The faint tinge of pink brightening his cheeks ousted any other contender for the world's most adorable thing. Victor kissed both of his cheeks, then his nose, then his lips. His skin was smooth and soft and warm, especially where he was blushing, and he smelled both of soap and salt. By the time he managed to drag his eyes away, the film had ended and even the credits had rolled by without them noticing.   
'Umm, it's kind of late,' Yuuri remarked, checking his watch and yawning for added emphasis. He stood up and placed his laptop back on his desk, then opened his wardrobe and pulled out the oversize sweatshirt he used as pyjamas. Victor always sported grey sweatpants and a tight-fitting vest top that did nothing to conceal his trim waist and ridged, defined muscles. Yuuri compared himself in a stained, threadbare baggy sweater to this droolworthy assemble and he felt upstaged somehow.   
As he brushed his teeth, Victor wandered in and sat on the edge of the bathtub to observe him.   
'Do you mind?' He garbled through a mouthful of toothpaste foam. Victor just laughed fondly and winked, not giving him a straight up answer, but then again he never really did.   
Yuuri had about exhausted himself when he clambered into bed and pulled the duvet up round his ears, so when Victor crawled in beside him he could barely find the energy to protest.   
'You have your own bed!' He whined, but he was fully aware that neither of them cared.   
'Yours is much comfier,' Victor whispered. 'And it's got you in it.'  
Yuuri hit him over the head, but although he made a great show of huffing and rolling his eyes, he all too easily relented when Victor started to spoon him. He made a soft sleepy noise and tucked his head into his chest, finally able to sleep comfily with Victor in his room. It did appear odd that he was more comfortable sharing a bed than them sleeping in different ones, but something had definitely changed between them and it would be useless to deny it. Victor fell asleep before him, or he assumed his state of unconsciousness from the heavy breathing on the nape of his neck. He felt the way Victor's body softened against his own, the same way he observed how his arms went limp around his waist. There was no doubt in his mind that Victor was going to be some monumental person in his life for as long as he lived. Whether they eventually drifted apart- and though he hated to think of it, this was a natural part of life and living- or they remained beside each other's side in some way or another, Victor was the one plot twist that had altered the course of his narrative. No longer was it an underwhelming tale of almosts and could-have-beens; now he felt like he was either in a tale of adventure or one of the terrible shōjo mangas Mari had tried to make him read a few times when they were younger and had spoken more often. He'd always known he wasn't a strong enough character to serve as a protagonist for anything too exciting, so a romance sounded just about right to him. Or even if the romance was just a subplot, it was a substantial one. It finally gave some life to his tale- he wouldn't say he was a hugely happy person, but his life wasn't laced with enough sadness or misfortune to be a tragedy. He was happy now though, happier than he had been in two years. Perhaps his entire life. It was hard to tell, since he wasn't particularly accustomed to joy and everything that came mixed with it. The only time he ever felt true, pure elation was sat on the back of a horse receiving a trophy and recognition for the fruits of his labour. He enjoyed winning.   
He realised this with a start, and it was the kind of epiphany that makes one review their life's choices up until that point. It made him want to work harder, dedicate himself entirely to training, and become a real winner. He saw Eros with a renewed perspective full of hope and was determined to make things work between them. Vicchan had been his heart horse, yes, but he hadn't necessarily been his best horse. Eros was more aggressive, more determined and more everything that made Yuuri's blood freeze in his veins, but above all that he was focussed on victory. Yuuri thought about the last time he had competed and how much Eros had enjoyed the atmosphere and had latched onto each fence with tunnel vision and a dogged determination. This was a horse that wanted to win no matter the cost. Vicchan had been sweet and genuine, whereas Eros was fiery and impatient and very unforgiving. If he wasn't ridden the exact way he wanted to be, he threw a tantrum and refused to do what he was being asked. Yuuri saw that they had a startling similarity in this; they both liked things to be just so and very much in their own way. They were both so stubborn and set in their ways that it was hard to bridge that gap, but maybe their common trait could somehow be melded together. He had to look at the quandary a little more objectively and appreciate what he had been gifted with, namely a brilliant coach (who he also happened to have a sizeable crush on) and an incredibly talented horse. If he could only learn to ride said horse, things would be much easier and the streets to success would be paved with gold for him. His reservations about forgetting Vicchan and dying at the hands (or hooves) of his possibly demented horse mattered not if he wanted this. He got a strong urge to wake Victor up and talk to him, but when he shifted round to do so he took one look at his face and couldn't bring himself to rouse the man from such a deep and peaceful slumber. His long eyelashes were brushing against his sleep-flushed cheeks and his flawless face was adorned with a soft smile. It was hard not to kiss him, but Yuuri managed to restrain himself from such whimsical follies, much to his own surprise. Instead he settled for taking his hand, intertwining their fingers together and feeling how well they fit. He was suddenly tired, and as he closed his eyes he felt a blissful warmth spread across him, soothing him to sleep like a lullaby. 

Yuuri found it hard to put his late night internal ramblings into words, but he could see that Victor basically got the gist of it as he explained it over breakfast the next morning.   
'I'm glad to know you're beginning to see things my way,' Was his first comment, but then he smiled widely, flashing a set of incandescent white teeth. 'In which case, forget the break. I think you've had enough time to think, and it's done you good.'  
For the first time, Yuuri was excited to get back on. As they drove down to the stables, he got an odd sort of sense in his stomach, one that made his legs jump about and his thumbs to twiddle incessantly.   
'Nervous energy, hmm?' Victor asked without looking down. 'Channel it.'  
It proved a little difficult to bring Eros in, as he'd been very much enjoying spending a little him to himself to just be a horse, but there was a task at hand and they had to focus. Revitalised, Yuuri felt much more limber when he climbed up into the saddle after tacking up and so on. He could also feel how fresh Eros was beneath him, which would usually fill him with apprehension. Today, though, he was ready for it.   
'You live in a country that cherishes its aesthetics, right?' Victor asked, and he nodded his reply. 'That's why you've been taught to ride pretty.'  
This should have been a compliment, but the way he said it made it sound like a negative thing.   
'I want you to get ugly, okay?' He followed up.   
Yuuri nodded furiously, though he was still finding it difficult to get tough when he needed to. As Victor set about putting up a complicated looking grid, Yuuri squeezed gently and let Eros burst forwards into an expressive trot. He kept his rising soft and low, but instead of his usual forwards seat he sat up as straight as he could. It came a little unnatural to him at first, but he soon got the hang of it.   
'Don't let your shoulders tilt forwards,' Victor corrected, observing him closely. He was standing in what Yuri had snidely named the 'instructor pose', in which he put his hands on his hips and tilted his head slightly. It gave him the appearance of a dancer about to start a very suggestive number, and it never failed to make Yuuri smirk to himself. Once he was satisfied that Eros was supple and forwards enough, he picked up an impulsive canter and rode him into the contact, rather than against it. The result was that Eros came into a consistent, self-carrying outline. It was such a relief that he could have cried, but he didn't get a chance before the horse began to fly buck at the sight of the jumps. Yuuri took a deep breath and instead of panicking, his legs remained firmly on Eros' flanks and he propelled him forwards with his seat so that the motion quelled the bucking. He worked the canter until he was assured that it was sufficient for jumping, then inched his lower leg a little further towards the girth, circled to establish a steadier rhythm, and pointed Eros towards the grid. It was a bounce followed by a short stride to an upright, then either one forwards or two collected to a wide oxer with poles slanted across the front bar to encourage a more careful and clean jump.   
'Hold him!' Victor growled, and Yuuri sat deeper into the saddle as he felt he ought to. He came a little close to the first, but recovered quickly and the rest of the grid went relatively well for a first jump, with only one leap of excitement in the getaway. 'Good, this is much better.'   
They spent the morning focussing mainly on control of speed and collecting up rather than back. Yuuri made a conscious effort to sit back more and take charge, and Victor noticed a definite change in him by the end of the session. It was nice to see his confidence growing bit by bit, even if the progress was slow. At least it was progress. He hated to admit it, but he'd been a little scared for a while after the fall. He was so desperate for this all to work out and for Yuuri to win that it had overshadowed everything else and set a rigid lance of anxiety through his heart. Now that they were out of the woods somewhat, he could see a lot clearer and his head felt lighter without so much pressure on it. This wasn't just a normal coaching thing- he had something to prove here. Everybody had messaged him to say that this quiet Japanese boy wasn't worth his time, that he'd never be anything special. He had persevered, though, and was fixated on seeing this through to the end, whenever that might be. He wanted to stay with Yuuri forever, but he didn't think that very likely because Yuuri was a reserved person and probably did not easily give his heart away. It was going to take a lot of coaxing and good treatment, which was nevertheless what he deserved just like anybody else. He didn't know what would happen when the FEI showjumping came to a close, but he hoped they would remain in each others' lives for many years to come.


	10. Chapter 10

Three weeks later, they were headed to the first leg of the FEI Longines World Cup showjumping series in Mexico City. Yuuri had mainly competed internationally in Shanghai and a few choice places in Europe. Mexico City was going to be a cultural explosion to him after the repression of his region in Japan. For early April, it was stiflingly hot and as they got off the plane (having flown economy because Yuuri refused to fly business) Victor was clipping back his hair from his face. He was wearing the same Gucci sunglasses he always wore, and anybody could tell by looking at him that he had some sort of high prestige. It wasn't the sunglasses or the expensive clothes or even the fact that Jakov was behaving like some kind of bodyguard; he had this massive charisma about him that was undoubtably that of a celebrity. Yuuri had yet to master such airs and graces, and he couldn't think that he ever would. He was naturally reserved and it just wasn't in his nature to be ostentatious like that. Yuri was already beginning to try and mirror his senior's behaviour, although he came across more as an entitled brat than a sophisticated success story.   
'Why did I have to fly peasant class too?' He was asking Victor, who just brushed him away with a snarky laugh.   
'It's good for you,' He reasoned.   
'I can't see how getting my legs crushed by the seat in front of me and a baby screaming in my ear could be good for me.'   
Victor looked thoughtful for a while, a line appearing between his brows. Yuuri was fascinated by it- he had never seen a single crease appear in Victor's face before. It was as if he had been ironed as well as his starch-stiff shirts.   
'Patience,' He murmured quietly, and Yuri looked both unimpressed and perplexed by this answer. Jakov ordered him to help him picking up the bags before he could cause any more trouble, and then it was just Yuuri and Victor alone together. Nothing much had happened between them in the past three weeks since their first kiss, just an occasional stolen kiss here and there but nothing more. It wasn't that they didn't want to, it was the sheer lack of time. It had been such a rush getting ready for the show that they'd almost clean forgotten they were meant to be messing around in the first place. Yuuri had been growing in confidence each lesson and Eros was coming on in leaps and bounds, finally starting to comply with Yuuri's demands, which had blossomed from politely-posed favours into commands.   
'Are you nervous?' Victor asked, and Yuuri was startled. 'Sorry, stupid question.'  
'No, it's fine.'   
'Do you know where we're staying?'  
'No.'  
Victor took his phone from his pocket and swiftly searched the hotel up, his elegant fingers distracting Yuuri as they stroked the screen. He handed it over, and Yuuri perused the sight, his interest not exactly piqued until he saw the gallery. He'd not once in his life breathed the same air as the kind of people who would stay in this kind of hotel. There was a jacuzzi in every room! This was perhaps not as exciting as it ought to have been since his parents ran a spa, but the fact that it was that kind of hotel filled him with a buzzing energy. Suddenly he thought of something his sister had once said to him about an acquaintance of hers. She'd told him how she'd been seen going into a place with a hot spring, and Yuuri had been very confused as to why this was such a terrible and incriminating act. She'd explained to him that 'a place with a hot spring' is a euphemism for a love hotel, and then she'd had to tell him what a love hotel was. He'd been ten at the time, but even now he couldn't say he fully fathomed the concept. He passed Victor back his phone, remarking that it looked really nice.   
'How are we getting there?' He wouldn't be surprised if it ended up being a stretch limousine.   
'Jakov got a hire car. He's driving us,' Victor told him. 'Come on, we should go catch up with them.'

The hire car was surprisingly normal by Victor's standards. Yuri sat in the front, refusing to be next to Yuuri and Victor for reasons unbeknownst to them.   
'We've got two rooms,' Jakov announced, and instantly Yuri begged to be with him. 'You always say you hate sharing hotel rooms with me.'  
'Please,' Yuri widened his eyes in an uninspiring attempt at puppy dog eyes. 'I don't care that you snore.'   
'Why don't you want to stay with Yuuri or Victor? If you don't like them together, don't you want to separate them?'   
'If I stay in a room with one of them, the other will come in and demand to share their bed.'  
They spoke in Russian to avoid upsetting Yuuri, who they both knew would get embarrassed and quickly het up if he thought they knew about him and Victor always sharing a bed. They'd heard plenty of it from Mari and Yuuri's mother, who found them adorable.   
'What are they saying?' Yuuri whispered to Victor, who just stroked his hair and told him not to worry about it, that they were just discussing who was sleeping where.   
'Where am I sleeping?' Yuuri hazarded the question, bracing himself for flirting.   
'We're sharing a room, it looks like. Is that okay?'  
Yuuri was astounded that Victor was being so uncharacteristically gentlemanly. Usually he would have made an inappropriate comment, whether consciously or not. From the very beginning, he'd been crossing boundaries with reckless abandon and had instantly treated Yuuri like a close friend rather than a near-stranger he'd elected to coach on a whim.   
Yuuri couldn't decide if he liked it or not, but he was certainly perturbed by it.   
When they reached the hotel, Victor even played porter and carried everybody's bags upstairs to the neighbouring rooms. Jakov thanked him gruffly, then told everybody to get some sleep because Mexico was 15 hours behind Japan and they were going to be jet-lagged as hell. Their plane had left Tokyo around midnight and the 13 hour flight had touched down at what was 10pm in Mexico City.   
'Hey, isn't it weird that technically our flight here leaves in two hours?' Yuuri frowned as he and Victor walked into their room and surveyed their new surroundings. They had a great view over the city and a jacuzzi on the balcony, which was really quite something.   
'What do you mean?' Victor's face creased again, puzzling over what he'd heard.   
'It's two hours before our flight left.'  
'I'm too tired for you to be tripping my brain out,' Victor groaned. 'We should sleep so we can go sightseeing tomorrow. Show's the day after and we need to leave the horses to settle, so we can have the day to ourselves.'  
'Hmm, that sounds nice,' Yuuri's eyes glazed over, shining in the dreams of a day of rest for once. He watched as Victor began shoving at his bed, frowning at him. 'What are you doing?'  
'Pushing our beds together, what else? It's almost like we have a double bed.'  
'Why didn't you just get a room with a double bed, then?'  
'There'd be speculation. Other competitors will almost certainly expect to be visiting us, and we can't have that if we've basically got a honeymoon suite.'  
Yuuri huffed and unzipped his suitcase in a stupor of exhaustion, yawning as he did so and rifling through it until he found his trusty threadbare pyjamas. He pulled them on hastily and climbed into bed, grateful to have a little more space for once. They didn't smell like home though, so for a while he lay staring at the ceiling, unable to drift off. Victor shuffled over, propping his head up on his elbow and looking down at him with an inscrutable expression.   
'Can't sleep, huh?'  
'I haven't travelled in a while.'   
'Do you get homesick?'  
'Not really. I mean, I went to university in Detroit and didn't go home for two years, so I'm used to being away from home, but... I'm just suddenly not tired.'  
'Want me to make you tired?' Victor winked, and Yuuri's cheeks flushed pink.   
'I can't believe you just said that.'  
'Why? We're messing around, so let's do it!'   
'By it, do you mean messing around or do you have other connotations attached?'  
'Whatever you want. I mean, other connotations might be nice... You know, we're in a hotel, I can't sleep, you can't sleep...'  
'I don't know,' Yuuri bit his lip. To be honest, he hadn't really thought about it much. Or rather, he had many a time, but only as a vague and abstract concept. 'Can I have a moment to think about it?'  
'No.'  
'What?'  
'Like you said, you don't know. That's not enough. I want you to be 100% certain about everything before it happens, okay?'   
Yuuri's heart fluttered fitfully, refusing to die down as Victor skirted yet closer and kissed his burning cheek. Never before had somebody treated him with such respect and so much care. It made him feel like a beautiful piece of art that needed to be preserved, and he loved it.   
'I'll tell you when I'm ready,' He mumbled, sleepiness finally beginning to take over his thought process. He curled up into Victor's arms and let his eyelids flicker shut. What had he ever done to deserve such a beautiful person in his life? 'Night, Vitya.' He used the same nickname he often heard Jakov use, and in return Victor kissed the top of his head in delight.   
'Oyasumi, porosenok,' Victor whispered into his ear before dropping his head back onto the pillows and closing his eyes. They fell asleep entwined together, neither one sure where their body ended and the other's began. 

They woke up blissfully late and drifted down to the buffet breakfast, Yuuri feeling fully rested and not as jet-lagged as he should have been. He put it down to one of the most comfortable night's sleep he'd had in a good long while. The food on offer made his mouth water- huevos rancheros, sweet breads, tropical fruits, granola, yoghurt... Both he and Victor went for the tortillas, though they didn't really seem like breakfast foods to him. They joined Jakov and Yuri, who looked considerably more worse for wear.  
'So, what's our itinerary for the day?' Victor chimed, ever cheerful.   
'You two can go off and do some sightseeing. I'm going to sleep,' Yuri grumbled, rubbing at the dark circles under his eyes.   
'Jakov?' Victor looked hopefully at his coach, but was met with a headshake.   
'I should make sure Yuri doesn't get into any trouble.'  
'I don't need babysitting, old man.'  
'Do you want to go with Victor and Yuuri?'  
'No!' Yuri was adamant that he would stay, slamming his fist down on the table, attracting the shocked eyes of the other people in the restaurant.   
'Ach, you're so difficult,' Jakov admonished him by thwacking him one over the head. 'You two go ahead and have some fun.'   
Victor ruffled Yuri's hair before they left, evoking a deep and animalistic growl which made Yuuri chuckle. He regretted this quickly when a spoon found its way into his face. Hard.   
'Stop being a brat!' Victor chided the deviant teen, hitting him on the head with the spoon. Yuuri dragged him away from the hotel before any more altercations could occur, and soon they were wandering down a dusty street lined with brightly coloured houses. Victor's arm brushed up against his own every now and then, and being in the midst of a city where nobody knew who they were or even spoke their respective native languages was comforting. At home, he had to work hard to hide who he was because the society there would not accept it. Here, he felt like he could take Victor's hand if he wanted to. Nobody was staring at them to judge the distance between them, nobody was glaring at them disparagingly, nobody was hurling abuse at them. He'd come to expect this from his home country some day, because he would have to come out to people at some point in the foreseeable future, but maybe he could spend his whole life travelling the world and going to places where he could love freely. Tall trees stood in regimental regularity along the streets, providing sparse shade and little protection from the blanket heat that produced heads of sweat on both their brows.   
'It's so hot,' Yuuri whined, squinting his eyes against the blazoning sun and trying to shield them from its rays with his hand, to no avail.   
'Want to get a drink?' Victor suggested, and Yuuri replied with unbridled eagerness. They found a quaint little cafe without outside seating under a canopy of thick dark green leaves. Yuuri browsed the menu, trying to figure out what everything was. English was difficult enough to recall after two years of not speaking it, so Spanish was confusing him a lot. Some words seemed kind of similar to English, but he didn't trust his judgment that much because English was a confusing language in the first place. A waiter came over and greeted them, to which Yuuri had no answer and just stared at them, mouth flapping. Victor, however, surprised him by dipping into a conversation in halting Spanish. Was there any limit to what this guy could do?   
'Yuuri, what do you want?' He turned to ask.   
'Uh, I don't know. I don't understand the menu, so just get me whatever.'  
Victor ordered something and the waiter nodded furiously, then a few minutes later came back carrying a tray.   
'Un batido plátano para usted,' The waiter placed a ghastly concoction in front of him with a flourish.   
'Gracias,' Yuuri knew he had the pronunciation completely wrong, but in his defence he had never had to say it before, nor heard it being said.   
'De nada,' The waiter smiled and disappeared after presenting Victor with a cold glass of sparkling water.   
'What is this?' Yuuri stirred the drink with his straw, grimacing at how thick the texture was and not trusting it in the slightest.   
'A banana milkshake,' Victor said this like it was the most obvious thing in the world.   
'Oh,' Yuuri sipped at it, and found it tasted just the same as the ones he had sometimes back home, if a little less artificial. As the cold liquid slid down his throat, he felt a little less stifled by the heat. A few ragged, tanned kids were playing canicas on the dirt outside the restaurant, and Yuuri found himself watching them. He wished that as a child he'd grown up in a city; he had always loved busy places like this, so full of life. As a painfully shy person, you wouldn't think it, but the hustle and hubbub of city life enthralled him and made him feel at ease. In crowded places like this, he could easily blend in unlike in his small hometown where everybody knew him and he never had any freedom of expression in case Mrs. Nakano from down the street might tell his mother. If not her, then anybody else. One of the kids looked up and stuck their tongue out, and a startled laugh burst forth from his lips.   
'What is it?' Victor looked up at him, bemused.   
'Nothing,' Yuuri was still smiling, but this time at how handsome Victor looked with his sun-dazzled eyes lit up and and beads of sweat dotting his pall. He sat and nursed his drink for a while, Victor's eyes not leaving his. There was a tension prickling between them, but not one that displeased him or put him ill at ease. It was more along the lines of suggestive and had the corners of his mouth lifting up quite by their own accord. Eventually the staring became too intense for him and he dropped his gaze to his now empty cup, twirling the straw between his fingers. He was about to open his mouth to say something when Victor's phone began to ring, some obnoxious chart music that made his head spin.   
'Hi,' Victor answered in English, which was curious indeed. Not Jakov or Yuri, then. 'Oh, really? No, that sounds like a good idea.'  
A brief pause ensued as he listened to the anonymous speaker.   
'Where is that? Yeah, I think I saw it somewhere. Okay, see you there. Bye.'  
'Who was it?' Yuuri leaned forwards and watched Victor waving over the waiter and paying, meaning their peaceful time at the cafe had come to a close. It sounded ominously like they had to pay a social call to somebody.   
'Cristophe Giacometti. He's nearby, and he wanted to see me. I think he's with a few of the other riders- is that alright with you?'  
'Oh, go ahead,' Yuuri didn't particularly mind spending time alone, although it was slightly daunting in a strange city where he didn't speak the language. 'I'll catch you later.'  
'What?' Victor chuckled softly. 'You're not missing this. Come on, it's just down the road- it'll be fun!'  
Yuuri felt the familiar tickle of anxiety playing at his stomach as they walked back down the street towards a bar that Cris apparently claimed served the best drinks he'd ever tasted. According to Victor, he spent very little time actually inebriated, but for some godforsaken reason he always came across as a drunkard when really he stuck to the virgin cocktails. They found him sat at the bar, slowly downing an eye-confusingly yellow drink and surrounded by a few similarly rowdy bunch. Yuuri recognised Phichit instantly, and he was waved over quickly to sit by him. To his right stood Sara and Michele Crispino, a sibling duo from Italy who were very big on equitation-style riding. Victor often complained about their supposed 'lightseat', claiming that if they sat so forward they'd end up on the floor the second anything went wrong. Yuri disputed this by explaining that the horses they rode were so flat that they didn't have the impulsion to misbehave in the first place.   
'You've been ignoring me,' Phichit whined, pouting like a child. 'You don't hate me because of the thing that happened?'   
'No, I've just been kind of distracted,' Yuuri glanced at Victor, which was obviously very telling.   
'Yeah, I wonder what could be distracting you? A hunky new coach, perhaps?'  
Yuuri giggled coyly, and Phichit did a double take.   
'Wait, seriously?'   
'No,' Yuuri forced himself to straighten his face (and his words), but his eyes gave him away.   
'Yuuri, have you met Cris before?' Victor dipped in to introduce him. Yuuri felt something pinching his ass and he leapt up from the stool as if he'd been electrified.   
'Hello, Yuuri,' Cris, the obvious perpetrator of this, cooed in his ear. 'How dare you take my Victor away from me?'   
'For god's sake, Cris,' Victor peeled him away and called over the bartender to order a round for everyone. He leaned into Yuuri to mutter in his ear, 'I'm sorry. Cris is a notorious pervert. Can I get you a drink?'  
'No way,' Yuuri couldn't quite rid himself of the image of the last time he'd been intoxicated from where it had been imprinted into the part of his brain responsible for controlling alcohol intake. 'I've learnt my lesson.'   
'Suit yourself,' Victor shrugged as he threw back a tumbler of whiskey. 'Don't look at me like that, I'm Russian! That's nothing to me.'   
Yuuri didn't really know the other riders well as he had never really socialised with them in his brief stint competing at this sort of level, so he stuck next to Phichit since Victor was already 'cheerful' and telling raucous stories about each rider in turn. He and Phichit talked about riding mainly, but Yuuri could see Phichit was itching to ask something, so he decided to hazard a guess.   
'Are you going to ask me more about Victor?'   
'God, yes.'  
'Not with other people around. We can text later.'  
'What's this?' Victor came and stood behind Yuuri, placing a hand on his head and ruffling his thick, dark hair.   
'Nothing,' Yuuri told him hurriedly.   
'Hmm. I thought I heard my name. Anyway, are you sure I can't get you a drink?'  
'Yes! We both know what happened last time.'  
'I don't know, I think it could be fun. Cris could use the excuse to do it again.'  
'Cris?'  
'Oh, you don't remember that either? He was worse than you.'  
'Really?'  
'I can't get over the fact that you've forgotten all of this...'  
'In my defence, I was very drunk. It's not that I forgot- I just never knew it happened in the first place.'  
'Fine, don't drink. Come talk to everyone else, though!'  
'I don't-' Yuuri began, but Victor was hauling him over to the other riders milling around Cris, who was relating how he'd just bought some crazy new wearable technology. Yuuri didn't really talk much, just listened, but he couldn't obfuscate from the conversation for as long as he might have hoped.   
'How does it feel being back after two years?' Emil Nekola, a showjumper representing the Czech Republic, kicked it all off. This was followed by a barrage of quick-fire queries, most of which Victor answered, but Yuuri knew he couldn't avoid speaking anymore.   
'Isn't it awkward to compete against your coach?' Seung Gil Lee's voice rose above the others.   
'Oh,' Yuuri frowned. He hadn't thought about that. 'Not really. I mean, I'm definitely not going to beat him, so...'  
'It's true, you really do have no self confidence!' Michele remarked with a laugh, receiving a sharp look from his sister for being so mocking.   
'He's right, you know,' Victor piped up, much to everybody's surprised. 'He won't be beating me, because we all know that's as near to impossible as things can get, but he's going to smash every one of you and get into the Final.'  
'Oh yeah?' Georgi Popovic, one of the Russian riders Jakov had left behind, sneered.   
'Wait and see,' Victor shrugged with a knowing smirk, and everybody's eyes landed on Yuuri. He blushed and looked down, incapable of defending his honour. He didn't really have any to defend.   
'I guess we'll have to,' Cris arched a finely plucked brow, his grin turning mischievous. 'I still can't believe that a rider so inexperienced could beat me and Toxie.'   
Toxie was the barn name of his highly-strung mare, Intoxicated. She had been a dab hand at dressage, but ultimately she was a stylish jumper. Cris was all about extravagant paces and looking as flashy as possible, and it really showed when he rode. His jumping position was essentially just him sticking his ass out as far as possible in jodhpurs that left nothing to the imagination. Self-obsessed didn't even begin to cover it. Then again, he couldn't be faulted for this as he was an incredible horseman and had consistently brilliant rounds. Not on a parr with Victor, but showstopping nonetheless. Besides, he was nowhere near as egotistical as Jean-Jacques Leroy, a Canadian rider with a colossal dark bay named King. Come to think of it, it was odd that he wasn't around- even at the only show Yuuri had competed at at this level, JJ had been hanging round everybody like a rope. When he snapped out of his deviating thoughts, Victor was angrily upholding his pupil's prestige, debating furiously with Georgi and Cris until Sara intervened and split up the tiff.   
'Victor, it's fine,' Yuuri towed him away as the evening drew to a close, saying his goodbyes to everybody and marvelling at how quickly it had become dark. Victor hailed a cab, explaining that they didn't want to be walking round Mexico City late in the evening- not the way they were, he said. Yuuri wasn't sure he entirely understood what he meant, but he went along with it all the same. His knee bounced up and down as the cab weaved its way through suffocating traffic, the anticipatory energy getting to him at last. The next morning they would have to wake up and get ready for the show and he really wasn't up for that. He needed something to take his mind off of it, and he knew just the thing.   
'Do you remember our conversation last night?' He leaned over to whisper in Victor's ear, and he nodded firmly. 'Well... I think I'm ready. If you want to, and we don't have to, so we can just-'  
'I'm glad,' Victor beamed, patting his thigh comfortingly. This gesture instantly calmed Yuuri down and he could feel an anxious but excited grin creeping across his face. Victor Nikiforov... How had he gotten into this position?


	11. Chapter 11

Yuuri's nerves were on fire as he walked the course with Victor, Jakov and Yuri. The atmosphere in the arena was one of unparalleled tension, everybody anxious for the first track of the circuit. The other coursewalkers were buzzing with an excitement he couldn't dream of possessing- for him, it was just layers of fear stacked on top of each other. He got past one fear only to find another lurked behind it, ready to pounce upon him at inopportune moments. It was a kinder course than he'd been led to believe, although that was quite typical for the first leg of Longines, and hopefully he could at least make it past the first fence without having a breakdown and pulling up, never to compete again. After the train-wreck of his last show, he wasn't expecting much. It didn't help matters that Victor was fussing over him constantly, readjusting his stock and lecturing him about the cleanliness of his jodhpurs. Already he had a fine dusting of sand that had been thrown up by feet hurrying past them, setting up distances and weighing up take-offs. Surprisingly, Yuri was behaving alarmingly well. He hadn't thrown a single tantrum and was planning his route with the utmost care, taking into account the most intricate details and discussing everything with Jakov, who appeared very startled by his sudden switch in temperament. Yuuri suspected he might be nervous about the bigger track, but he didn't mention it for fear that he might lose his head, although now that he came to think about it the prospect didn't seem as daunting as it ought to. Sizing up the colossal fences certainly wasn't doing a thing for his frazzled nerves, and with Victor prattling on in his ear about this turn and that stride at every given moment he felt like running away, curling into a tight ball and sleeping through the entire show. Unfortunately, he owed Victor this much. He'd even hired him a groom for the sake of keeping up his 'reputation', although Yuuri had neither a reputation to uphold nor a need for a groom. He had already explained this, but Victor would hear nothing of it. When they went back to the stable block, the groom was plaiting Eros for him.   
'No, I can do it,' He went to take over, but the groom just waved him away. Yuuri felt bad for not learning her name, but then she hadn't said anything more than a curt 'hello' to him yet. He didn't even know if she could speak English, or if she could understand his accent.   
'Yuuri, we have more important things to do,' Victor dragged him out of his stable and handed him his jacket which he slipped on, wincing at his aching body. Victor smirked and did up his buttons for him, giving him a sweet pat on the cheek and straightening his collar for him.   
'I'm fine,' Yuuri muttered, folding his arms across his chest awkwardly. At that moment, Yuri came past with a box of black plaiting bands.   
'Nope,' Victor swiftly intervened, confiscating them and ordering him to use the correctly coloured ones Jakov had specifically brought him. He didn't reply, just went a little red and nodded quickly.   
'Is everything okay?' Yuuri felt compelled to ask, unable to stand watching him so docile a moment longer. Yuri went even redder, ducking his head and scuffing his feet uncomfortably.   
'You can tell us,' Victor put a hand on his shoulder, but was shaken off. 'Talk to me!'  
'Do you have any idea how loud you are?' Yuri muttered, tightening his grip of his arms and digging his nails into his skin.   
'What?' Victor chuckled, taking a step back.   
Yuri proceeded to make a mocking high-pitched moaning noise, rolling his eyes back into his skull and panting Victor's name in a ridiculous falsetto. Yuuri was sure he could feel his heart tearing itself in half and the blood ceasing its flow through his veins. Victor was laughing his head off, wiping tears from his eyes as Yuri continued his impressions, whereas Yuuri flumped down onto a tack box, burying his head in his hands.   
'Oh, don't get me started on you,' Yuri turned his attentions to Victor, his eyes narrowing. 'I am fifteen. I don't need to be hearing these things all night.'  
'All night? It wasn't-'  
'4am, Victor! 4am!'  
'Okay, point taken. We'll be quieter.'  
'I think I'm going to retire,' Jakov muttered as he hurried past.   
Yuuri spluttered and managed to choke out something about cleaning his tack before scurrying away with his eyes trained on the floor and wringing his hands in humiliation.   
'Look, you've upset him!' Victor chided Yuri, shaking his head but laughing all the same.   
'You really like him, don't you?' Yuri looked to the heavens as if they could save him from watching the two of them fall in love and all that gross bullshit.   
'Go and get your demon horse and we'll warm up when Yuuri's recovered, okay?'  
Yuri noticed how deftly Victor avoided the question, but he didn't press it any further. He was still feeling a little sick with nerves, which usually didn't affect him. It was just the height of the course and the fact that everybody would be keeping a close eye on him since he was the youngest person to ever tackle this level of competing. Nevertheless, there was also a certain level of adrenaline. It was time to prove to everybody that he was better than all the other useless riders on the circuit, and that he could quickly surpass Victor. He knew Fluffy could do it, now it was just down to him. He pulled his hat on and buckled it up tightly under his chin, following it with his blinged out tall boots and show jacket with a diamanté collar. He wanted to be as eye-catching as possible, and being up against Victor made this very hard. Representing the same country made it almost downright impossible. He was determined to show him up though, and when he wanted something he got it. He led Fluffy down to the arena, where loads of people were milling about on colossal, astronomically priced imported warmbloods. Most noticeable was JJ cantering round with King painfully overbent and overtracking so much it was a wonder he didn't overreach. King was just very over-everything, just like his rider was incredibly overrated.   
He got a few disbelieving stares as he mounted, but he was used to this. Everybody always forgot how small he and Fluffy both were- he enjoyed proving them wrong and using their underestimation to shock them by taking first place. This was what he planned to do and therefore this was what was going to happen. 

Yuuri was well aware that he was being pretty useless as Eros threw him this way and that with excitement, his head chucking up and down and his legs dancing beneath him. Victor was busy warming up himself, so he didn't have any choice but sucking it up and dealing with it himself.   
'Just sit back and kick,' Victor called as he cantered past, and Yuuri flipped him off. Either he was being forgetful or he was being a dick. Either way, he deserved that middle finger. He hesitantly sat back, trying not to be so visible with his wincing, and put his leg on firmly. Eros eventually stopped twatting about and actually warmed up relatively nicely, even keeping the bucks to a single one after each fence. He managed to be brave enough to jump a few warmup fences, despite Yuri tanking around like he was at the races and cutting everybody off with no reservations. He was up third, which was obviously a terrifying prospect, but it meant that since Victor and Yuri were almost near the end he would be able to watch them. This was the only foreseeable positive aspect of having a groom in his opinion; an extra pair of hands meant he was done quicker and could see how everybody else got on. The two riders before him both went, and he was being called into the ring before he even had time to think about it.   
'Yuuri, davai!' Victor called to him, and he looked back to catch his eyes for half a second. That brief instance was enough to spur him on, and he conducted a flawless walk to canter transition. The first fence was an up-to-height vertical with a simple line and not too much to think about.   
It was a mistake to assume that there was nothing to think about and Eros rolled the pole because Yuuri set him up a little too deep, but it stayed up. Yuuri scolded himself and pushed Eros into a bolder canter, eating up the ground a little more and pushing for a longer stride over the second fence, another vertical. He was grateful that he couldn't speak Spanish; he couldn't understand a word of what the commentator was saying. He could only imagine they were unimpressed when he got in painfully deep to the double, Eros having to overcompensate with his backend and sacrificing the simple two strides that he had intitially planned for. He got an awkward three, which just cost him the back pole of the spread coming out of it. This was exactly the wake up call he needed and inspired him to engage his seat and put more pressure on his horse. He wasn't in the jumpoff, but he might still get points if he kept it at a fast four faults. He extended the canter for the long approach to the fourth fence, a spacious oxer, then shortened the last two and managed to take the exact stride he'd wanted all along. Encouraged by this, he kept his line straight to the next, a triple bar, which Eros cleared effortlessly with a grunt. He seemed to be on track for going clear for the remainder of the round, and he felt an immense relief riding up to the last because it had felt like the round would never end up until that moment. The joker subsisting purely of planks loomed ominously before them, the stripes and swirls distracting both him and Eros. Yuuri would have lost his focus entirely had he not had to deal with Yuri Plisetsky in training. He was now an expert at blocking out his frustrated yells and whoops of elation when he cleared a fence from a suicidal distance. He furrowed his brow and kept the jump clearly in view, his eyes fixed upon the point beyond it where he planned to go. Eros, however, had other ideas and spooked just strides away, his head jutting upwards and almost slamming on the brakes. Yuuri was well equipped to deal with this thanks to his fall, since Victor had spent hours teaching him to deal with attempted refusals (he believed that a refusal was a failure on the behalf of the rider, to whom it was down to to make it over the fence). He closed his legs, smacked Eros on the shoulder and got on with it. The horse skirmished beneath him, but he kept him straight enough that they just managed to salvage the line. With great effort, Eros threw himself over the fence, landing heavily on the other side and bucking furiously with indignation. Yuuri held his breath until he heard clapping, at which point he took a huge sigh of relief and basically collapsed on his horse's neck, rubbing his neck and grinning madly. Even though it wasn't a clear round, he was elated to have made it through with just one pole and no mental breakdowns. Leaving the arena was a blur, but when he passed through the warm up to take Eros back to the stables Victor immediately spotted him and waved him over.   
'How was it?'   
'Great! We got a pole, but I wasn't expecting much,' He smiled, and Victor leaned over to hug him. He struggled to let go, but he didn't want anybody to suspect a thing. He did manage to sit back up, though, although watching Victor walking away was painful because he wanted nothing more than to talk in depth with him after such a heartstopping experience in the ring. He hadn't expected to do so well considering he hadn't jumped such a full up course in a good while and the last time he'd competed at this level, he'd fallen off badly and lost his horse.   
'That's good! We'll rewatch it later and discuss the pole, but for now go sort yourself out and be back in time to see how it's done, okay?'   
'Yeah,' He nodded and returned to the stables, where the groom took Eros, against his will, and sent him to go watch Victor. Almost everybody else got a clear round, but he wasn't put off by this as they'd been at it much longer than he had and were much more confident. They'd also probably been training harder and longer, although he doubted any of them had as good a coach as he did. It seemed like forever until Yuri came galloping in, already completely out of control and sitting some colossal bucks. The second the bell rang, Fluffy leapt forwards and was off like a shot with Yuri hanging on grimly. Yuuri could feel a definite tension in the atmosphere, most likely due to the fact that this was the youngest competitor ever to hit FEI, and possibly the smallest horse ever. Yuuri could tell the teenager was nervous from the way his hands kept inching further up the reins, relying more and more on his hands for balance and steering and checking hard. He fought the urge to shout at him to lighten up, because he knew although it was what Victor would do, he wasn't his coach. Jakov appeared beside him looking haggard as usual.   
'He's scared,' Jakov observed, leaning against the barrier. 'But it makes him ride better. He's a little harsh, but he gets it done and he won't mess up.'   
Watching him attack every jump with such vigour, Yuuri wasn't sure whether it was inspiring or terrifying. He took a long spot into pretty much every fence, and with each one came a gasp from the attentive crowd, all on the edge of their seats. Despite his insane distances, he got a very easy clear round and scrambled over every jump with a lack of elegance but plenty of room to spare.   
'That kid is going to be the death of me,' Jakov grumbled, and then they waited until it was Victor's turn. It was no surprise that he got a beautiful clear round with perfect equitation and flawless striding with each line. Watching him ride brought memories flooding back of when Yuuri had been just starting out and seen him on TV astounding everybody the same way he did now. That was part of the reason he'd wanted to go into showjumping; watching people like Victor (especially Victor) ride in these events. Although his round looked floaty and serene, he got one of the fastest times and was well set up for the jump-off. It looked like it was going to be a very competitive class. 

Victor won, to nobody's surprise. He had been ostentatiously humble about it, going through the motions of modesty but flaunting his rosette a lot before tossing it out to the crowd. They were now sat on their beds in the hotel, which they had pushed together, watching back the footage on Yuuri's laptop, Yuri hanging over their shoulders.   
'Okay, what do you think happened?' Victor closed it and looked across at Yuuri expectantly.   
'I got in way too deep and got three instead of two.'  
'I could've made it with three,' Victor told him without reservation. 'You should've committed to the stride you went for and made it work rather than sit back and let it happen.'   
'Sorry. I'll get it next time.'   
'Yes you will!' Victor put an arm round his waist and kissed his cheek.   
'Nope,' Yuri sat back against the headboard. 'I swear I will leave if you start.'  
'Mm, please do,' Victor nibbled at Yuuri's ear with a grin, teasing the both of them and relishing how red they turned. 'We'd quite like some time alone, right?'  
'In which case, I'm staying,' Yuri crawled forwards and forced their faces apart. 'Why did you have to fall in love?'  
'We're not in love, idiot,' Victor reached over to ruffle his hair. 'Are you a hopeless romantic?'   
'You know what? I'm going to bed after all.'   
'You ought to sleep, we have an early flight tomorrow,' Victor told Yuuri, bundling him into bed and lying down beside him, wrapping him up in his arms and kissing the back of his neck affectionately. 'Goodnight, beautiful.'  
Yuuri made a soft humming noise of contentment and wriggled closer to Victor, closing his eyes and allowing his mind to slow down at last. He had a few days ahead of him to just relax and enjoy himself, which was exactly what he needed. To make matters better, he could spend the whole of it with Victor.


	12. Chapter 12

Yuuri hated flatwork. He hated it more than Yuri hated JJ. He despised it more than Victor could ever comprehend- and he certainly didn't try to.   
'That was not a walk pirouette!' Victor berated him as Eros awkwardly fumbled, uncertain of how to perform in the face of the complicated and most likely wildly incorrect aids he'd just been given. 'You're leaning forwards too much.'  
'Oh, and whose fault is that?' Yuuri retorted sharply, his entire body still aching from a 'movie night' that had inevitably spiralled into something more. Despite this pain, he sat deeper into the dressage saddle and allowed his inside leg to slide further forwards into a less comfortable but more technically correct position. He tried the pirouette exercise again, this time keeping a slightly firmer outside rein against Eros' neck and dropping his weight more onto his inside hip. Eros responded beautifully at first, sitting back on his haunches and showing the correct lateral bend for once, but then he began to get bored of these tiny circles and started rearing.   
'I'm ashamed,' Victor sighed dramatically, tossing his hands into the air and shaking his head. 'Just let me get on.'   
He borrowed Yuuri's hat despite it being a size too small and vaulted ably into the saddle, Eros coming into self-carriage the second he was asked for a walk. Yuuri felt mildly irritated by how beautifull Eros suddenly went, maintaining a perfectly on-the-vertical outline and the cadence in his paces increasing tenfold. He had to be doing it on purpose. Victor didn't help with his flawless riding and do-it-all seat. He began to walk the square, his legs constantly chattering away and keeping the impulsion up behind. The first corner he got to Yuuri could instantly see Eros lighten up in front and tuck under his hind legs, coiling up like a spring and obediently pivoting on his haunches. Several more of these and it got a little depressing.   
'I get it,' He grumbled. 'You're better than me.'   
'You'll be just as good once you learn to engage your seat,' Victor stated calmly.   
'Can I have my horse back now?'  
'No. I'm enjoying myself.'  
Yuuri made a big show of rolling his eyes as he stepped out of the arena and leaned against the fence to watch, his head resting on his arms. He watched as Victor reenacted some very basic, low-grade tests with acuity of aids and pinpoint precision. Each one of his movements looked worthy of a perfect score.   
'Now do something interesting!' He called out, not massively inspired by the gentle serpentines and basic school movements.   
'Like a canter pirhouette?'  
'Yeah. How do you do that?'  
'On this horse? With great difficulty. I think it would be overambitious to ask,' Victor replied as he gave the aids for a canter pirhouette, never one to back down from a challenge- even one of his own suggestion. Eros was struggling to shift his weight back far enough but he tried nonetheless, and the result was a fair attempt for a first try. 'I almost want to switch you to dressage.'  
Yuuri sighed deeply; why could he not have said that months ago when he was just beginning to struggle with jumping? It would have made things a lot easier for him, and as a bonus would have decreased his currently soaring chances of biting the dust. That said, he didn't think he could stomach having Victor as a dressage trainer full-time. It was like whenever they did a flat exercise that required him to bring his shoulders back Victor spiralled out of control and a sexual innuendo of some kind would litter every sentence. However much he had come to resent these dressage roots, he still had an immense respect for Victor and especially his showstopping talent. He easily persuaded Eros to attempt a shoulder-in, then a very questionable passage that looked a bit more like Eros was having a tantrum about it. Seeing him get so riled up and the new cadence in his steps was slightly intimidating and suddenly he didn't really want to get back on. He was perfectly happy to watch his horse behaving for once, even if it was in a way that scared him a little.   
'See how far my leg comes back,' Victor called as he exacted a flawless flying change. 'But the aid isn't just about the outside leg. If it was, you'd get in a bit of trouble trying to do tempis without producing the energy through your inside leg. Also, it's just one quick motion like a spring.'   
Yuuri nodded and pretended he would keep that in mind, but he knew that in the moment it would all escape him and he'd just rely on a turn to get it. Eros was a good enough horse that he'd do a basic change on a turn, but a full flying change wasn't going to happen until he had more confidence in his seat. It always came down to his lack of confidence, it seemed.   
'Is it horse swap day?' Yuri taunted as he let himself into the arena, almost hitting his poor horse in the face with the way he threw the gate open. 'If so, I want to see Yuuri ride Fluffy.'  
Yuuri laughed, but when he saw Yuri's expression the smile fell from his face.   
'That might be a good idea,' Victor was, astonishingly enough, in agreement. 'You know they're by the same sire, Yuuri?'  
'What?' His jaw dropped. 'Seriously?'  
'OL Aphrodite. I suppose you haven't seen Fluffy's passport. Anyway, I think it would be great for you to experience a different horse.'  
'That's a pony,' Yuuri frowned, wondering if his feet would even come off of the floor.   
'Shut up, she's a horse!' Yuri scowled acrimoniously in defence of his oversized pony. 'Fine, don't ride her. See if I care.'  
'Get on, Yuuri!' Victor ordered, entering a staring battle with his student. 'Yuri, you can ride Rialto if you tack up quickly.'   
Yuri pulled a face of disdain but obediently disappeared to tack up Victor's latest youngster, thrusting Fluffy's reins into Yuuri's hands. Yuuri looked at the small horse with trepidation stirring in his gut, debating over whether it was worth his life to do as Victor told him. He decided that it was scarier to disobey Victor than to face almost certain death on Yuri's demonic steed. He lengthened the stirrups by about fifty holes, aware that Yuri rode miles shorter than him. He wasn't hugely tall himself, but he rode quite long now that Victor had his way. The dressage they'd been doing had helped him to stretch his legs down more and stop gripping with his knees, meaning it was easier to wrap his legs round his horse and ride him into the contact rather than at it. He levelled Fluffy up with the mounting block and hesitantly reached to step his foot into the stirrup. With a defiant toss of her head, the mare danced sideways and almost pulled him off the block.   
'Please don't do this to me,' He pleaded, leading her back to it and being subjected to the same treatment again. 'I know I'm not Yuri, but please let me get on!'   
Victor, meanwhile, was laughing at his efforts and not even bothering to cover his amused snorts. Yuuri shot him a glare and led Fluffy to the block for the final time. This time, he leapt into the saddle with the agility of a deer and they set off at a brisk walk, Fluffy breaking into a jog. Despite having the stirrups on the lowest hole Yuuri still managed to feel like he was a jockey, and Fluffy didn't help matters when she started to canter almost on the spot, her head as high up as she could get it so as to avoid the bit and her front legs stamping at the ground in agitation.   
'Just send the thing forwards,' Victor said this like it was easy. How was Yuuri supposed to send the horse forwards if it was already cantering? Surely if he put any leg on the mare would just take off... And if he let go of the front end it was sure to burst forwards and careen around the arena like a wild thing.   
'That thing,' Yuri yelled from the side of the arena where he had materialised, a leggy bay in hand. 'Is my horse, and just growl at her.'  
Yuuri had never growled at a horse in his life and he didn't think he could. Instead he just eased the reins from his grip and allowed her her head, letting her drop it down top take a contact, although one that was very difficult to hold onto as she didn't touch the bit at all. She settled into a choppy trot, her paces ridiculously bouncy compared to Eros' which, while filled with elevation and cadence, were becoming relatively easy to sit to now that he'd started using his backend more.   
'I am never getting on a pony again,' He muttered to himself as she launched herself three feet in the air rather than perform the canter transition he had asked for. He'd seen her far worse with Yuri on her back, but at those times it always gave him the impression that she was excited. In this case, she appeared to be very pissed off and he couldn't blame her- she was a one-person-horse and being ridden by somebody so large and clueless had to be sorely trying her patience. His point was proven for him when she almost fly-bucked him into the sand. He held on with a grim determination, knowing that if he fell off he'd never live it down and nobody would ever let him forget it for as long as he lived.   
'Just kick her!' Yuri said this like it was obvious. He may have been a very kicking-with-spurs sort of person, but Yuuri most definitely wasn't and while he did manage to put his leg on stronger, he refrained from giving her the boot she deserved for fear of her reaction. He pulled up instead so that he could observe Yuri scrambling up onto Rialto, his legs barely making it off the saddle. Rialto, usually a well-behaved and quiet enough horse, suddenly became a racehorse. His ears pricked up and he jogged antsily, pausing occasionally to rear up a few centimetres.   
'He's got the worst electric seat,' Victor sighed, slotting Eros next to Agape, who pulled a vile face and tossed her head defiantly. 'That horse isn't going to calm down for weeks, now.'   
Yuri glared at them from afar as he geared up into a fiery trot, Rialto bobbing his head to evade the bit and every now and then he would swish his tail dramatically. After a few minutes of watching him canter (entirely out of control) round the arena, tilting terrifyingly close to the surface every time they turned a corner, Yuuko showed up to watch the spectacle.   
'I'm setting up jumps!' She called as she let a strikingly familiar girl on a stocky piebald into the ring, only for Yuri to practically mow them down. 'I'm teaching, so don't you dare cut off my pupil!'  
'This isn't a warmup ring,' Victor reminded the erratic blond, who had finally dropped back to a trot and was circling them, penning them closer and closer together. 'Are you trying to herd us?'  
'Well, Yuuri's sheepish enough already,' Yuri retorted and halted next to them.   
'Don't be rude to my boyfriend.'  
Yuuri's heart murmured at the sound of this word- that was new. It sounded worryingly official after they'd apparently decided to take things slow and see where it took them. Victor caught his anxious look and he looked equally tense, having realised his mistake.   
'Yuri, go and try and make something decent out of that horse, okay?' Victor ordered, and Yuri opened his mouth to protest, saw the tension between them and reluctantly obeyed.   
'Boyfriend, huh?' Yuuri raised an eyebrow.   
'Sorry,' Victor laughed it off, attributing it to being distracted and it just kind of slipping out.   
'No, it's fine. I like it.'  
'Really?'  
'Sure,' Yuuri watched as Victor's expression became effervescent with excitement. 'Still as a casual thing, though.'   
'Okay,' Victor beamed at him, waving Yuri back over from where he'd been exiled to the far corner by Yuuko while her student trotted over some poles. He was wearing his usual acrimonious expression when he returned to them, grumbling something or other about how he'd 'never faced such embarrassment in his life and how this would 'never happen in Russia'.

'If you feel that way, you're welcome to return,' Victor teased him, greatly cheered up by his conversation with Yuuri. They watched Yuuko's student for a little while longer as she was chased over some small fences with a lunge whip and Yuuko's startingly loud words of encouragement. 

'Poor kid, being watched by international showjumpers whilst learning to jump can't be any fun,' Yuuri sympathised, pursing his lips. 

'Then let's do something else!' Victor, already grown tired of standing around for no discernible reason, pushed Eros forwards. 'Let's jump!'

Yuuri laughed scornfully until he realised that Victor was genuinely suggesting he killed himself by attempting to jump Fluffy, and then he groaned and walked on with a sigh of great aggravation. 

'Yuuko, Victor wants to jump,' He didn't even bother to ask- they both knew full well Victor couldn't be stopped when he wanted to do something. 'I promise I'll make him be quick.'

Yuuko rolled her eyes- this was about as likely as the sun setting in the East. 

'Just watch our for my pupil, okay?' She called, but Victor had already raised his stirrups and set off in a perfect example of a collected canter. Yuuri had no inkling of how he managed it; he'd been riding Eros for months now and still hadn't achieved a canter of even half that calibre. Eros popped the jumps with ease, although they were nothing to him after the dizzying heights Victor occasionally liked to make them train at so that FEI courses didn't look so intimidating. Victor himself demonstrated equitation not even George Morris could fault, keeping his eyes peeled for the next fence at all moments and his lower leg not moving more than half a millimetre, even when exacting incredibly uphill and extravagant flying changes. Once he had taken Eros through the course to his soaring standards, he decreed that it was Yuuri's turn.

'Oh goody,' He grumbled as he nudged Fluffy forwards. The second the mare realised they were jumping she burst forwards into a pacey canter and threw in a few bucks of glee for good measure. Yuuri attempted to line her up to the best of his abilities, but still he found that they were moving sideways as opposed to forwards. He could feel Yuri's judgemental eyes pinned on him as he approached the first jump. The mare's jump took him by surprise and her exaggerated backend unseated him a little. He bit his lip and frowned as he drew his wits about him and regathered her up from the extended canter they were now chundering along at. 

'Kick her, seriously!' Yuri yelled at him, and having felt how delirious the pony was and as a result learning a new respect for her jockey, Yuuri took his advice with a pinch of salt nd kicked on. It wasn't the biggest of kicks, as kicking was still an element of Victor's instructional repertoire that was an alien concept to him. She instantly jutted her head up, but her legs came underneath her a little more and she began to feel manoeuvrable at last. He sighed as they jumped the final fence, but his relief was short-lived before Fluffy suddenly stuck her head between her legs and bronced hard. He hit the floor with a thump, feeling his shoulder crack painfully as he crashed down onto it. He grimaced as he pulled himself to his feet, nobody even bothering to walk over to see if he was okay. Where was the terrified Victor that had run into the arena that first time he'd come off? 

'I'm fine, in case you wanted to know,' He muttered, but nobody was much interested- they were distracted by Fluffy, who had taken it upon herself to take herself back round the course. Yuuko was chasing after her to no avail, and in the end Victor had to re-enact a movie scene by cantering after her on horseback and grabbing the reins as he drew level beside her. It was only once the devil pony was caught and Yuri had stopped complaining that she was going to keep broncing like that now that anybody inquired after Yuuri's health. He assured them that he was fine, just nursing a bruised ego. 

'Right, Yuri- off you go, then!' Victor took the attention away from Yuuri's unintentional dismount quickly so that he could save face a little. 'You need to get used to riding horses before you move onto a proper horse after this season.'

'Fluffy is a proper horse!' Yuri snapped, and Yuuri wondered how often they'd had this same argument. Quite frequently, he reckoned, if Victor's expression of irritation was anything to go by. 'She makes the height just fine, so what's the problem?'

'You're getting too big for her.'

'I'm not jumping your stupid horse,' Yuri hissed before leaping off and storming from the arena, towing behind him a very highly-strung Rialto. Victor sighed deeply and pinched the bridge of his nose, the only sign he ever gave that he was distressed.

'I don't know what to do with him,' He stared after the disappearing blond. 'He respects you, will you talk to him?'

'Me?' Yuuri scoffed indignantly; respect wasn't a word that came to mind to describe Yuri's attitude towards him. 

'Please?'

'I'll see what I can do.'

 

By the time Yuuri had put Fluffy away, he knew that Yuri could be practically anywhere by now. He didn't know him well enough to make an educated guess, but he knew of just one place he would hide himself. It was pretty much the only place on the yard with any privacy, especially given that it was the middle of the day and it seemed the whole of Hasetsu had come to bustle around the stables. He mounted the stairs to the loft, now coated in a thin layer of dust after being left undisturbed for a while. There was one pair of fresh footprints disturbing the dust motes and this convinced Yuuri was he was right. He found Yuri curled up on the moth-eaten sofa, flicking through one of the old photo albums that lined the shelves. He looked up when he heard Yuuri approaching and set the album down on the armrest. 

'Spare me the bullshit,' He growled, making space for Yuuri to sit next to him and hesitantly put an arm round his shoulders. 

'I know it's hard to move on from a horse,' Yuuri consoled him by rubbing his shoulder firmly. Yuri, for all his 'tough guy' exterior, sure was eager enough to lean into him and sniffle quietly.

'I don't want to move on,' He sniffed. 'She's the best horse I've ever had. Everyone always underestimates me because of my age, and they underestimate her because of her height- it makes us the perfect team.'

'Victor's right though, you know. You'll be too tall for her soon, and it would be too much to ask her to jump top tracks with an oversized rider,' Yuuri reasoned, keeping his voice light.   
'I don't really want to jump top tracks with another horse. I'd just become another Victor- nothing would set me apart from his shadow.'

Yuuri hadn't really seen it from that perspective before. He supposed he was all too ready to wallow in Victor's shadow, but he knew that for Yuri- somebody who had grown up training beside him- it had to be infuriating to not be able to make a name for himself without Victor's name being thrown into the mix alongside it. Since he hated most attention that wasn't Victor's, he couldn't exactly relate, but he definitely sympathised with Yuri's cause.

'You could keep riding her, just not at the same level,' He countered, but he knew it just wasn't the same. People would probably accuse him of being a trophy-hunter, anyway.

'Well... Can I tell you something in strict confidence?'

Yuuri was shocked by the idea that Yuri would confide in him with anything, but he nodded gravely. 

'I think I want to event,' Yuri confessed, and this was something Yuuri could never have anticipated. He'd never been involved in that area of riding, but he could see the attraction for Yuri. Bombing round a cross country course would be perfect for him and Fluffy, but he couldn't see them excelling in the dressage ring. Victor often tried to coach them, but more often than not he gave up and Yuuri had to be the one to comfort him in his frustrations. 

'Have you told Jakov?' He didn't even consider the possibility that he would have told Victor- the man couldn't keep his hair in check, let alone a secret.

'Nope. I think he'd refuse to coach me. I don't like showjumping that much, to be honest. I want to go cross country!'

'You know, we do have a cross country course here,' Yuuri suddenly recalled Yuuko telling him about it once and how it had only ever been used once because they had somehow assumed the role of a showjumping and breaking yard. She had never found the time to take a horse down herself so it had been left to mould for years. 

'I can't go down to it in my jumping tack, Victor will suspect something!' Yuri lamented, hardly daring to hope.

'So I'll distract him, send him off somewhere or-'

'Take him on a hack or something.'

'I'd rather be with you in case you hurt yourself. Remember, cross country is faster and the fences are much more solid. I'll make him muck out- you know what he's like.'

Yuri sniggered; Victor was infamous for his pernickety habits whilst performing stable duties. He would take the entire bed out and declare that it was necessary because he couldn't very well have his horse standing in muck if it was to be in a stable. 

'Thanks so much, Yuuri. You're not that bad.'

Coming from Yuri, that was a compliment of the highest order.

'I'll see you tomorrow morning, okay?' Yuuri grinned back at him with equal excitement and anticipation stirring in his gut.


	13. Chapter 13

'You've been acting weird all morning,' Victor grumbled to Yuuri as he set off on a hack with Takeshi, who had been more than happy to be complicit in the plan afoot. 'I didn't even see you before you left the house!'  
Yuuri had been down at the yard for 6am so that he could check out the cross country fences and fix up the more dilapidated specimens. He had never been the most adept at woodwork and as a result he was a bit beaten up from constantly managing to maim himself with the tools from his father's coveted toolbox.  
'I'll get back later and you can have me all to yourself,' He promised, his words laced with connotations and, paired with a suggestive smile, enough to send Victor on his way with a mind filled most likely with filth. Once he was out of the way, Yuuri went in search of Yuri. He was already in the arena warming up as instructed, because Yuuri had refused to cover for him unless he'd tired his frankly demented pony out some beforehand.  
'Cross country, huh?' Yuuko's voice startled him enough that he lost his footing on the slope down to the arena and almost fell onto his ass. 'Never thought of you as an eventer...'  
'How did you know?' He was sure he hadn't breathed a word of it in her direction.  
'You don't think I didn't notice you sneaking off this morning? There's only two things in the direction you were headed, and something tells me you aren't particularly interested in the old broodmare paddocks.'  
'Okay, you got me,' He threw his hands up in mock surrender. He couldn't keep a secret to save his life. 'Yuri wants to event so I said I'd cover for him while he used the cross country. Don't you dare tell Victor!'  
'I don't think I'm the one who's likely to tell him,' She pointed out, raising an eyebrow. 'Why didn't you tell me sooner? There's a great course I know, we could've boxed up there. Oh, there's a little event coming up there in two weeks, I'm sure!'  
'Isn't that a bit optimistic? We'll just have come back from Shanghai.'  
'It only goes up to 90cm. That is, if he'll agree to jump that low. Hey, we could box up to that yard tomorrow if you want to- I've got a viewing in the morning but other than that Takeshi's in charge.'  
'I'll talk to him. Look, I'd better go before he takes matters into his own hands. I'll text you later, okay?'  
They waved goodbye to each other and Yuuri began the long trudge down to the cross country field for the second time that morning, following behind an excited-looking Fluffy and an equally anticipatory Yuri. He relayed Yuuko's idea and Yuri's eyes widened at the prospect of both training at an official venue and finally getting the chance to event himself. He nodded eagerly, agreeing instantly to both the minute they were to suggested. The only rub was what to do about Victor. If they went trailering somewhere without him and refused to tell him what they were doing (if they lied and said they were going showjumping Victor would demand to tag along) he'd be even more suspicious- it wasn't as if Yuuri got on too well with his junior, anyway. They seemed to be alright now, however. He supposed it was because he was the first person who had given Yuri the means to what he most wanted and had passed no judgement on it. The field was huge and the second they passed through the dense woodland into it and Fluffy began to prance about on her toes as usual.  
'Okay, just go and jump that log there,' Yuuri pointed to the smallest jump he could see, which wasn't much smaller than the others. They were all ridiculously small compared to the fences Victor had them put through their paces over day to day, but they were all they had for the moment. He expected a complaint along these lines, but Yuri seemed to be ecstatic just to be able to jump a rustic fence for the first time. Yuuri had managed to watch a load of cross country videos online whilst Victor had been in the shower, and while he wasn't exactly an expert he kind of knew what it ought to look like. It certainly wasn't what Yuri was doing. He was still doing his normal showjumping canter, but since he was nervous he was getting too handsy and causing Fluffy to increase in power upwards rather than forwards. Usually this would result in an increase of impulsion rather than speed, but in this case more speed was (for once) required and rather than a collected canter it was a choppy, uncomfortable and unbalanced sort of thing. By the time they were but a few strides from the fence they were barely moving from the same position and Yuuri had to resist the urge to chase the pair of them with a lunge whip. Fluffy very boldly and honestly jumped anyway, but it was nail-biting to watch and Yuri got a shockingly deep distance, burying the poor mare right into it.  
'You need more of a canter. Go for a jump-off canter, but bolder and more expressive,' Yuuri instructed Yuri when he had finally managed to come to a halt, Fluffy still tossing her head up and down.  
'That doesn't really help,' Yuri pointed out, but agreed to try it again. This time he circled before the fence and opened up the canter more but he was still holding on far too tight and Fluffy was too distracted fighting the contact to concentrate on her feet. She chipped in again and Yuri almost went flying. It made for a very dramatic and painful demonstration of the work Yuri was going to need to put in.  
'Okay... Let's try another fence. One she'll back off from,' Yuuri rubbed his chin thoughtfully and looked around the field. None of the jumps were particularly challenging, and certainly the heights weren't a big ask for either of the pair. He finally settled on a little rolltop, and despite its small size it was actually the biggest jump on the course.  
'You don't need to be so worried,' He told Yuri as a last resort in the knowledge that he'd be furious about being construed as scared in any way. 'Let her take you to it and then just ride her over it. Take her for a good gallop up, collect her, then jump. Got it?'  
Yuri grimaced and nodded before setting off at a nifty canter. He gently eased the reins from his grip and allowed the mare to surge forwards and lengthen her stride into a gallop, hanging on grimly as she began to get faster and faster. It was at about the point that Yuri galloped past the fence he was supposed to be jumping that Yuuri realised he had lost all semblance of control. Within seconds he was texting Victor to tell him they were going to a bit bank later. Eventually Yuri managed to pull up a little and thanks to several quite violent half halts he was able to approach the fence at last. His canter was much bolder and freer coming into it and as a result he was rewarded with a clean, neat jump from his horse and a huge smile on his face.  
'You were looking so much better by the end,' Yuuri appraised once Yuri had jumped a few more fences (all with slightly less elegance than the rolltop, but considerably better than the first two jumps). They walked back up to the yard and Yuuri helped to hose off a very sweaty Agape, and in that time Yuri managed to refrain from making any sarcastic or capricious comments. He'd become far more docile now that he was beginning to see Yuuri as less of a threat towards his career, having previously been worried that he might take Victor all to himself. He still did a little bit, but Yuri was inexplicably grateful for what he was now doing for him. Nobody had ever asked him what he wanted to do before- it had always been assumed he'd be a showjumper. There had never been the option for him, but now it was being given to him by somebody he perhaps hadn't been the nicest to in the past.  
'Umm, thanks for... All of this,' He mumbled awkwardly when they carried his tack to the tack room.  
'What? Oh, it's nothing,' Yuuri just smiled gently and patted him on the shoulder as if it was nothing. 'I mean, I get what it's like to have people assuming you're one thing when you're really not and having to hide that.'  
'Right,' Yuri bit at his lower lip, then winced as it began to bleed. It was a terrible habit of his, one that meant he frequently had to carry tissues round with him to stem the blood flow. Thankfully this time it was just beading up and welling into a microscopic dot. 'People are assholes.'  
'Mm. Not all of them, though.'  
'I tend to err on the side of most.'  
'That still has exceptions.'  
'I used to think it was all, but I think I've changed my mind. You're an exception.'  
Yuuri beamed at this and was about to speak when he heard hooves ringing on the cobblestones outside the barn. He followed the sound to see that Victor and Takeshi had returned, Takeshi covered in mud and Victor somehow immaculately clean as usual.  
'Hey!' Victor waved down to Yuuri as he ran up his stirrups whilst onboard. 'What've you been doing all morning?'  
'Nothing interesting,' Yuuri lied through his teeth as he took Victor's reflective for him. They walked together down to the stable of the youngster he was riding and sponged it off in a silence that was not uncomfortable. Once everything was finished and the horses put away, Victor pressed the matter again.  
'Seriously, you're still acting weird,' He accused and Yuuri acted even weirder once it had been pointed out. He was awful at being secretive.  
'How was your ride?' He blatantly obfuscated.  
'Good. Lots of scary things in the bushes, but he's slowly getting used to the world. You know, I was thinking that-'  
'Here we go,' Yuuri rolled his eyes. Often when Victor said he'd been thinking it meant he was about to reveal some brand new training exercise that would inevitably lead to Yuuri nearly falling off or at the very least making a fool of himself.  
'I was thinking we should get you a youngster. Bringing one on would be really rewarding for you and give you something to do when I'm teaching Yuri.'  
'I've brought youngsters on before,' He pointed out. He'd been helping Yuuko with hers since he was just 12.  
'Have you ever owned one?'  
'No, but I hardly see how that makes a difference.'  
'Just does.'  
'Anyway, Eros is a youngster!'  
Victor made a sound of disagreement and shook his head.  
'But he's jumping too tracks already so not really,' He explained.  
'You really want this to happen, don't you?' Yuuri was taken over by a smile- he couldn't help it. Once Victor got an idea in his head it would remain there until it came to life, and he was hugely adept at and used to getting his own way. There wasn't any way he was going to get out of this.  
'I just think it would be good for you,' Victor reiterated his original point.  
'Fine. But I get to choose it, okay? And I'm paying for this one.'  
'You can choose, but I'll pay.'  
'We're not debating this. You already bought me a horse, which was way too much in the first place.'  
'Please! As a birthday present!'  
'My birthday was in November.'  
'And I didn't get you a present, so this is a late one.'  
'Most people would just go for a card or something.'  
'I think we both know I'm not most people.'  
'Fine. We will buy a project after Shanghai is out of the way and after that you'll stop trying to buy my affections.'  
'You wound me.'  
Yuuri smiled wryly and reluctantly allowed the thought to become a permanent one. So his boyfriend showered him with lavish gifts- was that so much of an issue? Most people wouldn't complain. He just hated the idea of being a burden on someone and being dependent, even if it was of Victor's own accord that he was doing all this. The equestrian community could be rather jaded when it came to people who had their horses bought for them and he was eager to avoid becoming the subject of these vitriolic comment threads. In fact, they got pretty vicious over just about anything  
He and Victor were just about to leave the yard to go get something to eat when Yuuko came jogging over to them, red-faced and exuding stress.  
'Which one of you wants to do me a massive favour?' She panted as she drew level with them, bending over and placing her hands on her knees. Yuuri knew it was all just for show; in reality, she was the fittest person he knew. She had to be, running a busy yard.  
'It depends,' He raised an eyebrow. Favours for Yuuko could be anything from turning a horse out to mucking out the entire yard.  
'I've got a boy just come to view a horse half an hour early. I was going to get one of our liveries to jump it for them, but they're not getting here for an hour. I still can't jump with this damn back of mine, so will one of you do it?'  
'Sure,' Victor shrugged. 'Which horse?'  
She led them both back into the yard and down to the back block of stables that went largely unused after a recent downsizing on horses- scores had been sold off before the season began. A dappled grey gelding was napping with his head leaning against the stable door, his lower lip hanging down in relaxation. When Yuuko chucked the saddle over his back he started suddenly back to attention with a snort, his head snapping up and his body tensing.  
'He's a bit spooky,' She warned as she slipped the bridle over his head. He was bitted up with a gag on the third hole and a grackle, which told Victor that he was probably going to have some fun reeling it in. He fetched his hat and boots and only when he went to mount up did he notice the tall boy with a vibrant red streak in his blond hair observing them intently.  
'Hi, I'm Victor Nikiforov,' He went to shake their hand and was met with a grasp like a wet fish.  
'I know,' The boy uttered, his eyes shining with recognition. Victor fought to keep the smirk from his face.  
'Oh, you know me as a rider?'  
'As a coach, actually. To Yuuri Katsuki,' His eyes swivelled to stare at Yuuri, who went beet red and wrapped his arms round his chest in an attempt to shield himself from any potential criticism or, even worse, compliments. 'I'm Minami Kenjirou.'  
Victor smiled and they all walked together down to the arena, Minami quizzing Yuuri in great depth on his showjumping career to date. Victor watched his boyfriend go from tickled-pink to magenta, amused by his aggressive modesty. He had a passionate aversion to talking about himself or having other people regard him highly. Victor, on the other hand, knew he was an insufferable showoff and he made no apologies for it- the way he saw it, there was nothing wrong with self confidence and he had genuinely done very well for himself, so why not flaunt it at every given opportunity? For example, he was very pleased to have been given this horse to ride so that he could show off to an impressionable teenager who clearly looked up to him. He made sure as he warmed the horse up that not even George Morris could clock his seat, his lower leg not even moving a millimetre, even when the horse shied violently at a very threatening bit of arena fencing. Yuuko set up a few jumps for him, talking to Minami as the three of them watched Victor popping over them easily. He was surprised to find that the horse had quite the jump in it, although slightly uncomfortably exuberant with its hind end. It was also painfully strong and looking at Minami, who was the human equivalent of a beanpole, he wasn't inclined towards thinking that this was going to be a match. Minami was tall, yes, but he wasn't muscular and this was a headstrong, raunchy horse that even Victor was having slight difficulties keeping collected. Yuuko put the jumps up a few holes again, roughly 1.15m or roundabouts. Victor kept a firm hold of the horse as it catapulted itself over each fence with vigour, grunting with the effort and flicking its tail like the propellor from a helicopter.  
'It's a really nice horse,' He remarked when he got off to let Minami have a sit. 'Lot to handle, though.'  
Minami still appeared to be in shock from seeing two prominent riders, and it didn't help matters when Yuri Plisetsky showed up with an acrimonious expression on his face and a whip in his hand.  
'What's with the whip?' Victor felt compelled to ask, although he was slightly afraid of the answer he might get.  
'So I can separate you and Yuuri if you try anything on,' Came the sardonic reply. Yuuri returned to his state of being flustered, acting as if they weren't always touching each other somehow. 'Why are we all watching some kid?'  
'Yuri Plisetsky- youngest ever rider to excel in FEI with the smallest horse, right? 5th place in Mexico City!'  
Yuri looked starstruck, his jaw going slack and his eyes widening. It was a little disconcerting to him that somebody he didn't even know would greet him by just listing off his achievements like a Wikipedia article. He didn't reply, instead shrugging his shoulders and shoving his hands into his pockets.  
'Right, go and try the horse,' Yuuko instructed Minami and he obeyed her quickly- nobody ignored Yuuko if they wanted to keep their head.  
Victor was surprised by how well Minami rode; despite his slender frame he managed to keep the horse perfectly in check, not unseated by any of its antics and remaining perfectly on balance on both the approach and getaway. His position over the fences left a little to be desired but overall he was pretty damn good. He came away with a massive smile on his face- whether it was from the horse or meeting three minor celebrities Victor could not tell- and told Yuuko he'd talk to his trainer and get back to her within a few days. She sent him on his way with an equally big grin at the prospect of more money she could spend on surfacing the new arena that was being built.  
'Okay, you can go,' She waved off Yuuri and Victor.  
'Glad I could help out,' Victor replied in his usual charming manner and Yuuri couldn't help but roll his eyes.  
'Let's go,' He grabbed Victor by the arm and dragged him down the driveway back to the car before Yuuko could ask them to do anything else. He was absolutely ravenous and couldn't wait to get home and eat half the contents of his fridge. They gave Yuri a lift back, although they were almost refused because Yuri claimed that he couldn't even stand to be in a car with them. His protestations were rather on the loud side, so when Victor had managed to bundle him into the car he gave him a bit of a seeing to.  
'You do know you're not supposed to be telling anyone about me and Yuuri, right?'  
'Yeah,' Yuri rolled his eyes. 'Not like I especially want to talk about it with anyone, anyway. Why are you even keeping it so quiet?'  
Victor didn't answer. He wanted to keep it on the low because he didn't know how it was going to work out. He didn't want to make a big thing out of it in case Yuuri lost interest and he would have to keep smiling through the breakup like nothing had happened. Truthfully, he was somewhat afraid to make it official because then he'd be leaving himself defenceless against the jagged talons of heartbreak. He trusted Yuuri, though. He also knew that Yuuri needed time to get used to things before everybody started making a big deal out of it. Instead of giving voice to these concerns and reasonings he reached for Yuuri's hand, his thumb brushing across the back of his hand comfortingly.  
Yuuri sighed blissfully and leaned his head back, allowing his eyes to droop shut. All he could see was a beautiful golden colour behind his eyelids from the sun permeating the car and mantling him with its warmth. The air smelled slightly of cut grass and horse, a perfect and familiar combination that never failed to relax him. He was hyperaware of Victor's fingers woven through his and he squeezed his hand tightly with affection. He'd always thought that the idea of a 'happy place' was sentimental puff designed to make the speeches of sports psychologists sound more inviting, but now he felt like he kind of understood the concept. If ever he was worried (which he frequently was), he felt like if he allowed his mind to wander back to this moment it would surely fill him with such a warmth that nothing could surpass to harm him. In this moment he felt undeservingly happy and safe.


	14. Chapter 14

Yuuri had only ever been to Shanghai once in his lifetime, and even now it still astonished him. Everywhere he looked was a flurrying hubbub of commercial and business life, everybody hurrying to get to places and vendors calling out their ware above the cacophony of noise pollution. It reminded him somewhat of Tokyo with its tall, stretching buildings and crowded streets packed with life at its most exuberant. They'd decided they couldn't face dinner in the hotel when all they really wanted to do was sleep, so they'd gone out hoping that the atmosphere would infuse them with some life. The restaurants were all pretty jam-packed but they managed to get a table at the back of somewhere after Victor waved a few notes at them. There was, Yuuri supposed, some benefit to having a wealthy boyfriend. Victor ordered a bottle of wine (obviously) and ordered for everybody, because apparently amongst his vast repertoire of talents he was able to speak a few words of Mandarin.  
'Doesn't really matter here,' He remarked, attempting to be modest. 'Most people speak Shanghainese.'  
'Is that really a language?' Yuuri raised his brows in disbelief.  
'Dialect, actually. Now, do you want some wine?'  
'I try not to drink before a show.'  
'Right, I forgot... All the more for me, right?' Victor grinned mischievously, pouring himself a glass and taking a long sip. Yuuri caught his eyes across the table and felt a blush creeping across his face, colouring his cheeks and making him break out into an awkward smile. Victor stared right back at him intensely, refusing to look away and all but declaring a staring contest.  
'Please stop eye-fucking across the table,' Yuri groaned, covering his eyes. 'We haven't even got the food yet.'  
'Yuri!' Jakov chided him, smacking him over the head as a disciplinary action.  
'At least somebody understands that he's just trying to wind poor Yuuri up,' Victor pouted, patting Jakov's shoulder in solidarity.  
'No, I agree with him,' Jakov grunted. 'Stop undressing each other with your eyes or I will be put off my food.'  
Yuuri swiftly apologised and made sure to avoid Victor's eyes. Victor dissolved into laughter, already slightly tipsy and giving Yuuri cause to look up again just in time to see him go to undo the top button of his shirt. Not hugely promising...  
'Victor!' A loud voice that Yuuri instantly recognised boomed across the restaurant. Yuuri raised his eyes from Victor's neckline to see Celestino and Phichit making their way across the restaurant. 'Fancy seeing you here, eh?'  
Celestino had been Yuuri's coach for several years and it still made him feel a little guilty to see him after having suddenly upped sticks and quit riding competitively, dropping his coach without a further thought. He coached Phichit now, and it was just as well because Phichit certainly needed somebody to rein him in (no pun intended). As it turned out, they'd just come in for dinner by complete coincidence, and as a result Jakov invited them to sit with them as he and Yuri were just leaving.  
'What about your food?' Victor pointed at their almost full plates.  
'I don't think Yuri likes being around you when you're drunk,' Jakov countered with no hesitation.  
'What? Why not?'  
Jakov stared at Victor for a very long time, offering no answer other than his obvious belief that it was blatantly obvious. Yuuri had been fortunate enough to encounter Drunk Victor on a few occasions and he could definitely see where Jakov was coming from- the man had a terrible habit of removing anywhere from most to all of his clothes and getting very, very advertently sexual. In other words, not appropriate for the eyes of Yuri, a minor. Yuuri didn't particularly mind Drunk Victor as it was always a total laugh and he didn't exactly disregard the chance to see him getting undressed, but he could certainly comprehend why anybody would want to stay five miles away. Still, he was a little upset that Yuri still harboured some resentment towards him when he thought he'd make a breakthrough with the whole eventing thing. They'd gone to the cross country yard with Yuuko as promised and she had really helped Yuri get to grips with cross country, having done it once or twice herself to make her horses bolder. She had offered to call a really good trainer she knew too, and they were coming down to advise Yuri a few days after they got back from Shanghai. Excited was an understatement for Yuri's emotions when Yuuko had suggested this- he'd been practically incandescent with elation.  
'Yuuri, you promised me an explanation when we were in Mexico that you never delivered,' Phichit sat opposite Yuuri and leaned across the table to talk to him, one eyebrow arched and a smirk beginning to play across his face. Yuuri looked to Victor, who was now completely unbuttoned and laughing raucously with Celestino- distracted for the time being, thank the lord.  
'Okay, fine,' He grumbled, leaning even further forwards so that their conversation wouldn't be overheard. 'We're dating. It's not a massive thing, but that's how it is.'  
'Oh my god, I knew it!' Phichit beamed, proud of his clairvoyant abilities.  
'But we're not telling anyone just yet, so don't you go making a meme about it this time!'  
'Point taken, point taken!'  
They chatted for a while longer about this and that, mostly horses and competing and their competitors, until Victor threw his arms round Yuuri's neck and started slurring incoherently into his ear in Russian.  
'Yeah, not getting any of that,' Yuuri told him, peeling away his arms and standing up. 'We should be getting back. It's kind of late and I think you're going to struggle sleeping off that hangover.'  
'Aww, so soon?' Victor pouted and did his best efforts at puppy dog eyes, but all it did was make him look slightly deranged. 'Okay, if you want to... But let's get a cab, alright?'  
Yuuri nodded widely- he doubted Victor could walk in a straight line, let alone all the way back to the hotel. They said their respective goodbyes to Phichit and Celestino and were on their way, Victor pretending not to have squeezed Yuuri's ass flirtatiously as they stood up. Yuuri had to be the one to hail a cab, get their doorkey from reception, bundle his inebriated boyfriend into the lift and all but carry him over the threshold. Once they were in their room he realised he was probably going to have to dress Victor himself the way things were going. He sat him down on a bed and slowly removed his shirt, Victor shivering as the cool air from the air-conditioning hit his flushed skin. Yuuri kissed the nape of his neck softly, gently stroking his hair and humming quietly into his ear. He knew Victor slept shirtless without fail (most likely just as an excuse to show off his toned and flawless torso), so that just left the awkward quandary of his lower half. He sat there for a moment debating over whether or not to even bother, because it wasn't as if Victor was likely to keep his clothes on for much longer anyway. After a minute's thought he sighed, got up to open the suitcase and find a pair of sweatpants, and undid Victor's belt for him.  
'It's okay, you don't have to,' Victor took his hands, chuckling to himself. 'I'm not as drunk as you think.'  
'What the hell, Victor?' Yuuri groaned, resisting the urge to smack him with said belt.  
'I'm Russian, you think a few glasses of wine will get me that drunk?'  
'I mean, you are a bit drunk...'  
'Maybe so, but not drunk enough that I can't dress myself.'  
'You're such an asshole, I swear to god.'  
'You can dress me if you want!'  
'That does it,' Yuuri growled playfully, slamming Victor back on the bed and crouching over him, grinning devilishly.  
'You wouldn't dare,' Victor retorted, an icy tint glancing in his eyes.  
'Try me,' Yuuri whispered, then dug his fingers into Victor's side and laughed as he shrieked and writhed beneath him. He continued to torment him, finding as if by telepathy all the places where he was most ticklish. In the brief few seconds that he was moving his hands Victor attempted to tickle him back, but all he did was worsen his own fate.  
'How come-' He gasped. 'You're not ticklish? You're a freak!'  
'I'm too strong,' Yuuri cried, bending down to brush his hair against Victor's neck, making him squeal again. 'You're so childish, you know.'  
'I'm a fountain of youth.'  
'Yeah. What are those wrinkles then?' Yuuri swiped a finger over his forehead, his time teasing and light but Victor scowling at him.  
'They're frown lines,' He muttered.  
Yuuri smiled at how deeply offended Victor was by the concept of aging, but he made no retraction on his statement. Instead he clambered off the bed and demanded that Victor change as he wanted to get a good night's rest before the show the next day. Victor wrinkled his nose up but did as he was told, no reservation with stripping right down. Then again, what could Yuuri expect from somebody who wouldn't even hesitate to remove their shirt in the middle of a restaurant? He changed quickly himself, not entirely sure why he was so shy when it was nothing Victor hadn't seen before. He flicked off the lights and crawled into the invitingly cosy drawn-together twin beds with their equally seductive inhabitant. He squished himself into Victor's arms and sighed in contentment, closing his eyes and sinking into a deep sleep.  
        Victor wrapped his arms around Yuuri tighter, kissing the top of his head and feeling his heart constrict as Yuuri made soft, snuffling noises in his sleep. Was there anything more perfect than this? Was there any possible way to be any happier than he was in that moment? He hadn't the answer to either of these questions, but he got the idea that actually every day he spent with Yuuri he got just that little bit happier. Even now, when he was asleep, he was so warm and affectionate that it was impossible not to fall head over heels for him, maladroit and easily-flustered though he was. It was actually endearing when he was shy and anxious- Victor found the way he went suddenly quiet and would grip his head between his hands like that could keep the self-doubt from leaking out and becoming evident saddening because he knew that Yuuri had more talent than anybody he'd ever met, but then when he did well he became all modest and smiley and it turned Victor into mush. He had never felt emotions like this; so intense, so all-consuming that at times he wondered if he would explode. He didn't really know how to deal with them so mostly he just threw extravagant gifts around because he was terrified of losing Yuuri and most people he got close to were easily bought with trivial largesse. He knew that a lot of the time he came across as painfully desperate and needy, but he knew no other way to ensure Yuuri remained by his side. For his whole life he'd enjoyed all the perquisites of popularity and wealth, but this was really the first time he'd pined for something other than a good reputation and his name in the headlines, whatever the headlines may be. He'd always been some sort of King Midas, turning everything he touched into gold and winning at every opportunity he was granted, so to have to work for somebody's attention was a novel concept to him when usually he could just impress everybody with his medals and trophies. Yuuri was different to everybody else he'd met, though. He saw past all that superficial bullshit and saw an actual person. It was refreshing to say the least. With Yuuri, he became a human being rather than just a puppet on strings being contorted into a show-stealing rosette machine, and he liked that very much. With Yuuri, his fake, fake smile became genuine. 

The next day definitely did not carry the result that everyone had expected. Yuuri made it into the jumpoff, for one, and whilst he had a pole it was a challenging course and he still placed a respectable 4th. Victor came third to JJ, who had had a very lucky day to place second, and this was making everybody huff and puff in irritation. Nobody liked to see that self important git succeeding. Most astonishing of all was that Yuri Plisetsky managed to pull first place. After a very cautious (for him) first round, he'd stormed through the jumpoff with a look of fire in his eyes to take home a win, shocking everybody and landing him a feature on Horse & Country TV in the broadcasting of the Longines Cup.  
'My horse was feeling really good today and it seems everything's coming together beautifully. I'm looking forward to winning the cup!' He stated when asked for a comment on his round, much to the irritation of the competitors surrounding him. Victor laughed and clapped him on the back, although there was definitely some bitterness behind his laugh- he didn't take too kindly to losing to his students. Yuuri hadn't quite made he podium but he was ecstatic nonetheless, as was Victor with the progress he was making, and they ended up sneaking off to the horsebox whilst everybody else stood around to chat so that they could drink Yuri's victory champagne- confiscated by Jakov on the grounds that he was far to young to be drinking- in peace.  
'To a good season,' Victor raised his glass and Yuuri clinked his own against it.  
'And to not getting a pole next time,' He added before they both tipped the contents of their glasses back down their throats. They finished off the bottle quickly, both becoming giggly and handsy within minutes.  
'You did really well today,' Victor praised in between kissing Yuuri, gripping at his thighs.  
'Mm, I did,' Yuuri agreed. 'Are you proud?'  
'So proud,' Victor grinned and slowly lay him back on the sofa, taking care not to fall off the side. 'How should we celebrate?'  
His words and tone were laced with suggestive connotations and Yuuri had to stifle a laugh.  
'In the horsebox? Seriously? You're unbelievable.'  
'There's a sofa in here for a reason, you know...'  
'Like sitting on it?'  
'This sofa's not the only thing I'm going to be sitting on.'  
'I can't believe you just said that,' Yuuri sighed, covering his face with his hands. 'This living compartment is meant for stuff like eating and- no, I'm not giving you the satisfaction of that. This sofa is for taking a nap.'  
'I'm going to do so much worse than that...' 

Since Victor and Yuuri were agonisingly hungover the next morning, Jakov drove the lorry down to the airport. Thanks to his constant economising on time by taking all the shortcuts and somehow knowing where all the traffic convened they arrived early and could sit in the living compartment for a while drinking coffee and discussing the day before. Yuri was still riding the buzz that winning had given him; it was easy to forget that he'd pretty much won every class he'd ever entered at junior level, so to him winning was actually rather natural. He was mostly excited because he'd finally beaten Victor and he took no hostages whilst rubbing this fact in.  
'I guess I don't need you as a coach anymore,' He taunted, making Victor roll his eyes theatrically.  
'If Aria hadn't tripped and lost the canter I would've won,' Victor responded coolly. 'There was only a two second difference between our times. I reckon her stumble cost us four.'  
'Say whatever you want,' Yuri sang gleefully. 'I still won!'  
'Have you ever heard of such a thing as modesty?' Jakov chastised his young student, pairing his words with a pointed glare designed to inflict fear in even the most atrocious of foes. Despite his age and lack of hair, Jakov was certainly a force to be reckoned with and was intimidating enough to have Yuri quieten down and flick through one of the catalogues left out on the small table. Occasionally he'd stop to scrutinise something a little closer- usually that something was black and completely unnecessary- then show it to Jakov, who invariably told him he didn't need it and that it would look stupid anyway. Victor joined him, hankering after all the matchy sets and gazing wistfully at the dressage jackets.  
'If you miss it that much just do it again,' Yuuri told him upon seeing how longingly he looked at the top hats and tailcoats.  
'No, I'm a showjumper now. Maybe I'll start again some day,' Victor drifted off into a daze and Yuuri shook his head.  
'We should probably get going,' Yuri piped up again. 'Our flight's kind of soon.'  
'Good idea,' Jakov nodded. 'But first, lets tidy up in here a bit- it's a mess! What have you been doing in here?'  
Victor and Yuuri gave each other a look that was very transparent in its character and Jakov went purple.  
'Jesus Christ, I am never asking that again...'


	15. Chapter 15

A few days after they returned from Shanghai Yuuri was packing the lorry for the next day's venture into vastly uncharted territory- eventing. Yuuko was coming, along with Minako- one of the instructors who had been the one to teach a tiny and chubby Yuuri to jump all those years ago on his first pony on loan from Takeshi's family. He'd cried, of course, but she'd chased after him with a lunge whip until he relented and wobbled his way over his first cross pole on the bottom holes of the wings. A true display of brilliant coaching technique on her behalf.   
Victor was becoming more suspicious by the day and Yuuri was finding it increasingly harder to come up with excuses or ways to distract him. Today he was helping Takeshi with a troublesome yearling who didn't want to have his feet done, but he was still confused as to why everybody was dashing off to some undisclosed destination with Yuri looking suspiciously like he was gearing up for a show. He made no complaints though, because he trusted Yuuri to tell him what was going on in his own time and he didn't want to pressure him or anything. Yuuri knew he was taking advantage of this a little, but in his defence it wasn't his own secret he was keeping.   
'Are you sure you know the test?' He asked as he clambered into the lorry, Yuri squished up on the middle seat and Minako driving so that she could give Yuri some advice- or, as she called it, rules.   
'Yes,' Yuri sighed theatrically. 'It's easy to remember.'  
'Not so easy to ride,' Minako remarked, thinking back to watching Yuri ride it as if every turn was part of a jump-off and there was an optimum time. Agape spent the entire test trying to work out where to place her head- for half a movement she'd have her head jutted into the sky like a temperamental meerkat and the remainder she'd be five miles behind the vertical, nose tucked into her chest and a contact nowhere to be found. In all honesty, it would be a miracle if they got anything below 50 penalties. Their showjumping wouldn't be a problem, of course- for a top FEI showjumper a 90cm course was sure to be a breeze. That said, they were certain to have time penalties by the bucket the way Yuri just aimed and fired at every jump as if he was riding Secretariat in the final length of Saratoga. At least they'd clear the fences... Or so everybody hoped. Agape was still largely unproven over cross country fences after having only schooled them just twice and having had excruciatingly dirty and completely unnecessary stops both times. Agape, it seemed, had a paralysing fear of drop fences. It was the one thing that, as a showjumper, she had never encountered and could not abide. Ditches didn't phase her in the slightest as she only had to step over them like a pole and she'd had to deal with similar-looking water trays on various occasions. Anything with a drop, however, she simply reared up until she was almost vertical and then either ran backwards until she could no longer see it or launched herself off it so violently that Yuri very nearly hit the deck.   
'Are you nervous?' Yuuri didn't know why he bothered to ask this question; of all of the things he could say, this was probably the least productive and would serve only to set Yuri off.   
'No,' Yuri snapped, proving his point. Whenever he was anxious, Yuuri had noticed, he behaved like a snapping turtle. He would narrow his eyes just so and pretend that even the suggestion that he might be nervous was offensive. There was no getting through to him when he was in a state like this.   
'You should be,' Minako again subtly cast criticism. 'There's a drop fence in the course.'  
'So?'  
'So, your horse can't stand them and you haven't been down one without a stop to date.'  
'It doesn't matter if you get a stop,' Yuuri gave Minako a look that said 'leave the boy alone'.   
'If I get a stop I'll never be able to face getting on a horse again,' Yuri replied. Minako nodded widely in agreement and Yuuri was taken by surprise that the two would turn out to have so much in common. Come to think of it, they both criticised him an awful lot and with no reservation. They could certainly bond over that.   
The venue was nearby and they soon reached it, parking in a large field that was densely packed with rundown trailers and a few fancy-ish lorries. Victor's enormous lorry looked like a supermodel in a nursing home. They got a lot of stares as they climbed out the front and Yuuri regretted not taking something else, but then he remembered that his own lorry, whilst smaller, would still look almost as out of place. Showjumpers just tended to be far more ostentatious with their wealth and liked to splash out on big, expensive things to intimidate people into thinking they were champions. It didn't help that Victor's name and the Russian flag were plastered all over the side in a Victor-esque fashion.   
'I think I've forgotten the test,' Yuri suddenly went wide-eyed as he went to open the tack box. 'Shit- will you find it for me?'  
'Luckily for you I memorised it,' Yuuri tutted at him and recited the test to him until Yuri was able to chant it back word-for-word. 'There. You'll be fine.'  
They went and got his number and entry sorted and then it was all something of a blur until all of a sudden they were at the dressage warmup and Yuri was fighting to control his neurotic mare who had decided she was on the cross country course already.   
'Sock her one!' Minako yelled at him as Agape threw a colossal buck that had several pony club mothers gasping and sighing at who they assumed to be the poor boy's parents for not getting rid of such a dangerous mount. Obviously they didn't know that his parents were somewhere in Russia and he was the one who refused to sell the pony.   
Yuri kicked her hard and she eventually settled down into an almost-outline, her head hovering frustratingly just above the vertical with no sign of her ever lowering it any further. At least it was remaining relatively still for once except for the occasional defiant head toss. The test itself was a tad painful to watch and the judge even had to pull Yuri up to ask if he'd forgotten the test because she'd mistaken his two half-circles for a change of rein. Unfortunately, Yuri still couldn't speak a word of Japanese and it was only much later that Yuuri had discovered what had been the holdup. When Yuri at last saluted atop a prancing Agape, Yuuri released the breath that he'd most likely been holding for the entire duration of the test in one big gush of air.   
'Well, he's not been told he can't move forwards to showjumping,' He observed with an odd mixture of relief and disappointment. It was actually terrifying to think of Yuri going round a cross country course, even with his air-jacket (Minako had insisted on this purchase the second she'd seen his horse in action) and impossibly sticky seat.   
'I did it!' Yuri squeaked as he returned triumphant, rubbing Fluffy's neck and profusely praising her.   
'Now just an easy bit of showjumping,' Yuuri reminded him, which put an even bigger smile on his face. Here was something he could definitely excel at. He went to change his bit to his jumping one and add on a martingale and breastplate and then it was off to the showjumping ring. The warmup was busy already with a broad mix of ages zipping around on their horses, most of which were a solid hand or so bigger than little Fluffy. It was almost amusing to watch Yuri's face as he rode around the ring, deftly weaving in between the people and yet trying so hard not to tread on anyone's toes. Usually he would have wreaked absolute havoc by now, but clearly today he was trying his best not to piss everybody off. Probably worried he'd be kicked out or something. Yuuri went to stand at the side of the arena as the person before Yuri went, taking out his phone to film it and save the memory. It was also strange to see Yuri jumping such small heights and he wanted to cherish the sight.   
'Hey, isn't that kid the one who was jumping at Longines?' Yuuri heard a portly teenage girl say as she pointed to Yuri when he trotted in, looking somewhat bored.   
'Who won at Shanghai!' The girl she was talking to nodded eagerly, whipping out her phone. This was not looking good... If word got out, Victor would be sure to know and swiftly ban Yuri from entering any more events. He'd say the cross country would ruin Agape's carefulness. He'd say it was beneath a rider of his prestige to event- and at such a low level, too. Yuuri was too shy to say anything, unfortunately, and he had to watch on as the girls took pictures to their hearts' content.   
'Looks like he's made a bit of a name for himself,' Yuuko commented. 'Good for him- he's worked so hard to get where he is, he needs more credit than he gets.'  
Yuuri nodded in agreement, then the three of them fell silent as Yuri cantered into the first.   
'Currently in the ring is number 506, Yuri Plisetsky from Russia,' The commentator announced as Yuri rocketed around the course. 'On a dressage score of 53.6.'  
Minako snorted with laughter at the number and Yuuri hurried to hide his second-hand shame. That was sure to put him dead last. He knew placings didn't matter in the long run but Yuri wasn't a good loser and it sucked to be around him when he was bitter from not winning something. To him, second place was a loss. Sometimes it was like even first place wasn't good enough for him.   
Predictably, Yuri got a clear round with plenty of suicide strides and fly bucks from his equally cheerful pony. All that was left now was the third and final phase- cross country. Arguably the make or break phase. If he got this right he could go home happy and if not, he would go home with a bruised ego and potentially disillusioned with the idea of eventing. Yuuri didn't want to see that happen after he'd been so excited to finally get the chance to follow his frivolous dreams of eventing, so he elected to give him a bit of a pep talk that he hoped would be inspiring enough to power him round the course. Failing that, maybe Yuri would go clear anyway just to say 'screw you'.   
'You'll go clear, easily,' Yuuri told Yuri once he'd changed into his colours, put on Fluffy's boots and changed her saddlepad. 'The jumps are tiny and she's a good little pony.'  
'I know,' Yuri nodded. 'We'll do just fine.'  
'And- oh. Yeah, good. Ready to go?'  
'Yep.'  
'Armband?'  
'Yeah.'  
'Gas canister all good?'  
'Yep.'  
'And your girth's oka-'  
'For god's sake, Yuuri,' Yuuko put a hand over his mouth to shut him up. 'The boy can handle it himself. He's a big boy now.'  
Yuri smiled and thanked her, vaulting athletically into the saddle and tightening his girth a few holes. They made their way down to the start line, where there was a buzzing queue of riders all warming up or milling round the start line. Yuri was given a fifteen minute wait and so they stood around for a bit to watch everybody else starting and flying over the first few fences before disappearing into woodland. Once they received the five minute warning Yuri began to pop the warmup fences and practise slowing down as a preliminary measure that he for sure wasn't going to be using. All too soon he was bundled into the start box and was being counted down by a stout man in a raincoat.   
'Go!' The man shouted and Agape was gone before Yuri could even register her movement. Their approach to the first was so terrifyingly quick that Yuuri genuinely believed they would go right through it and for a gut-wrenchingly frightening moment he saw images of rotational falls and broken necks. Despite the breakneck speed, they were actually fine and for a long and pensive few minutes there was nothing left to do but wait until Yuri finally appeared once more in the near distance grappling with his reins and attempting to haul Fluffy in a bit before the drop fence. Yuuri gripped at Yuuko's arm as he approached it with a steely determination reeling off of him in waves. For a moment it looked like she might stop, but then Yuri gave an almighty kick and she heard his orders loud and clear. She chucked herself over the fence and took off running upon landing. The final few fences were a breeze in comparison and before long Yuri was walking back to his support crew, a grin stretched across his face and Fluffy visibly steaming from the exertion of it all.   
'Wonderful!' Yuuri professed, taking a side of Fluffy's reins in case she decided she wanted to resume her cross country escapade. 'Double clear in your first event, how does that feel?'  
'Pretty good. Hey, maybe I've won.'  
'Not with that dressage or those time pens you're going to get,' Minako told him primly. He stuck his tongue out and reiterated the fact that he'd just gone double clear so he didn't care. They got back to the lorry just in time for Yuuri's phone to ring. The screen told him it was Victor and, although he didn't have time to read them, Yuuri could see several texts from him also. This was promising.   
'Yuuri, have you taken Yuri showjumping?' Victor began the conversation with an accusation. Yuuri thought hard for a brief second- the girls had only taken pictures of Yuri whilst he was showjumping, but no doubt cross country and dressage pictures would materialise somewhere.   
'Can I tell you when I'm home?' He requested. It was about time he be honest because hiding this tiny little secret was actually getting far too inconvenient for him. Anyway, Victor might be really happy for Yuri.   
'Okay... See you soon, love.'  
Yuuri said goodbye, hung up and gulped. How the hell was he going to explain his lying? How was he supposed to convince Victor to let Yuri event? Most importantly, how did he persuade Victor to support Yuri in this big decision?


	16. Chapter 16

'Now will you finally tell me what's been going on with you lately?' Victor pressed for the thousandth time. Yuuri had been obfuscating ever since he'd returned from whatever mysterious location he'd been haunting all day, dashing around to do meaningless chore after the other.   
'Okay, just-' Yuuri attempted to dart around him but Victor deftly blocked the doorway he had tried to escape through.   
'Yuuri. I respect that you don't tell me everything but this is seriously confusing me.'  
'Okay, fine. You really want me to tell you?'  
'How'd you guess?' Victor remarked drily, stepping down and visibly relaxing.   
'Promise you won't get mad.'  
'Okay... That sounds worrying, but I promise.'  
'I took Yuri eventing.'  
'You did what?'  
'Yesterday. Look, the thing is he told me he's always wanted to do it and that he didn't feel like he could since he'd always been a showjumper and I said I'd take him to some-'  
'Woah, slow down,' Victor chuckled, putting a hand on Yuuri's chest as if to physically decelerate him.   
'Right. I said I'd help him out and Yuuko helped him with his cross country so yesterday we went to a little 90 just to test the waters.'  
'You did that for him?'  
'Well, yeah... I mean, he really wanted to do it so I...' Yuuri trailed off when he caught Victor's unimpressed expression. 'Sorry. Bad idea.'  
'No- fine idea, I'm just thinking about his dressage. That was a bad idea; he shouldn't be allowed to flat in public.'  
'He did get double clear, to be fair to him!'  
'I can't believe you didn't tell me!'  
'I thought you'd be angry.'  
'I mean, I am a bit angry. He needs to concentrate on his showjumping.'  
'I don't think he really wants to showjump.'  
'Seriously?!? And you didn't think to tell me this?' Victor lamented, the blood draining from his face and his eyes going wide.   
'Sorry,' Yuuri mumbled, his cheeks going pink and his gaze falling to the floor.   
'No, it's not your fault,' Victor hugged him gently, knowing he got a bit sensitive when people were angry around him, even if the ire was directed towards other people. 'I just wish he'd told me, is all.'  
Yuuri nodded and wriggled further into his embrace, relishing the warmth amidst the cool evening and the chill still left over from the air-con being on for most of the day.   
'I think he was just scared you wouldn't support it,' He explained, not wanting Victor to get the wrong end of the stick.   
'I don't think it's a good idea, but I can help him with his dressage.'  
'Is that a good idea?'  
'Yes. I'll whip him into shape before he next events, I can tell you that. I'll even school Fluffy if he wants.'  
Yuuri beamed- he was excited to tell Yuri that he no longer had to keep his eventing ambitions hidden from the world and that he was going to have his dressage sorted out for him by a professional, even if it was somebody who drove him round the bend. Victor could work wonders with a horse, it just took a bit of thinking to come up with a way for the rightful rider to achieve the same results, or as close as the could get. Yuuri was kind of excited for what was to come.   
             The next day Victor practically stepped onto Fluffy, used to horses twice her size and half as forgiving as she was when it came to mounting. Yuri was world-reknowned for probably never having used a mounting block in his life. Each time he rode her he just scrambled up from the ground with a pronounced lack of elegance or care for the fact that some day he would most likely do her back in or snap his stirrup leather.   
She was surprisingly obedient when Victor mounted despite his being almost a foot taller than her usual jockey. She was slightly less so when he asked her to move forwards into the contact, jutting her head up into the air obnoxiously and grinding her teeth against the bit.   
'Is she always this feisty?' He asked, having to wrestle with her a little to lower her head a few inches. She didn't drop onto a contact but it was a good sight better than what it had been a second ago and that was progress in itself. Yuri nodded, nibbling at the inside of his lip anxiously. It went without saying that he wanted his dressage to improve so that he could actually start winning some events.   
Victor lowered his hands and held them wider, attempting to coax her into mirroring his body language with her head. When this didn't work he found himself a little stumped for the first time. It wasn't that she physically couldn't, because she had a strong topline and was generally muscled quite well allround. The problem was her personality- she was just as stubborn as her owner. He would have to build up the progress slowly, taking each session very gently and allowing her to figure her own head out; pulling her into it was the worst thing he could do. He explained this to Yuri, who looked more than a little miffed to discover that his woes couldn't be fixed in five minutes.   
'I'll do my best,' Victor promised. 'And meanwhile you can practise your showjumping! This eventing thing isn't getting in the way of that- there's too much at stake for you to throw it away.'  
Yuri pulled a face of disagreement but nodded anyway, not quite ready to disobey Victor again. Anyway, he did still enjoy showjumping and he wanted to prove his worth in Longines. He still relished the look on everybody's faces when he beat their 16.3hh warmblood showjumpers. He was the definition of coming from the rear, and he certainly had no reservations about stamping on other people's dreams to get there.   
'Are you sure?' He softened his tone. 'I mean, won't it bruise your ego when I beat you again?'  
'Schooling session is done,' Victor scowled and leapt from Fluffy, tossing the reins in Yuri's direction and fixing him with a death stare. 'In a few weeks we're off to Madrid and I am going to regain my honour.'  
Yuuri was inexplicably relieved that they had a few weeks' break from competing to get some training in the bag and he could take some time to really knuckle down on his fitness, too. He'd noticed that he was starting to get a little more out of breath after training than usual and it was just days before Victor noticed and sent him out a four-day run. He had time to pull things together and hopefully claw his way a little further up the rankings. 

 

              Victor was elated to be back in a Hispanic country so that he could show off his linguistic ability once more in the full knowledge that Yuuri loved it when he spoke other languages.   
'I can even speak in tongues,' Victor remarked when Yuuri brought it up, and he could see Yuri's foot coming from a mile away. He caught it before it could catch him square in the jaw, twisting it so that Yuri ended up on the floor. Victor grinned and placed a foot on his chest, acting as if he was some kind of Viking warrior who had claimed another victim.   
'You're such a child,' Yuuri admonished, helping Yuri up from the floor and dusting off his jacket. 'We have a course to walk!'  
'Get you, bossing your trainer about,' Victor raised an eyebrow, still smirking. Yuuri could see that both of his comrades were in high spirits, probably due to the early night Jakov had forcefully inflicted upon everyone before an early start to replait Fluffy after she had inevitably torn out each and every plait. Jakov oversaw and helped with Yuri's plaiting whilst usual plaiting guru Victor was 'otherwise distracted', meaning he was too busy flirting with Yuuri and chatting shit to Cris about the other competitors.   
Yuuri had learnt to tune out his boyfriend every now and then when he was trying to concentrate. There were only so many cheesy pick-up lines he could take before he needed a moment to concentrate. As it stood, he was still trying to clean his boots without dropping the sponge for the thousandth time. He was perfectly content to sit on his tack box and occasionally allow Victor's conversation with Cris to drift in and out of his ears.   
'And what about you, Yuuri?' Cris suddenly directed a question away from Victor.   
'Hmm?' Yuuri looked up to see them both staring at him expectantly.   
'What do you think about Victor's gloves?'  
'His gloves?' Yuuri didn't look best pleased. He had been distracted for this?   
'Are they navy or black?' Victor thrust his hands into Yuuri's face, making him drop the sponge and cry out in anguish.   
'Okay, I need you to make the decision for yourself so I can get everything else done around here,' Yuuri told him firmly, beginning to sound like a mother doing the dishes. Victor pouted and slouched off to no doubt attack somebody else over his choice of gloves- what did it even matter whether they were black or navy? His jacket was black with navy trimmings today, so they'd match either way, and it wasn't as if anybody would be closely judging his attire. They'd be too distracted watching Aria fall onto her face every other stride and still managing to get a flawless clear round. Yuuri sat and scrubbed at his boots, wondering why this one stubborn bit of grease was refusing to budge.   
'Give it here,' JJ appeared and held out a hand, somehow managing to make even that action egotistical. Yuuri stared up at him for a while before handing it over hesitantly. JJ knelt down beside him and within seconds the spot was gone. He handed the boot back and accepted the profuse thanks with a nonchalant shrug as if to say it was nothing.   
'Have to help the small fry,' He simply commented, and this made Yuuri tense a little. He knew he wasn't exactly on the level of everybody else competing but it might be nice to get a little more respect every now and then. Even Victor had told him he shouldn't be expecting to get any firsts just yet while he was still getting used to the atmosphere, although he had meant it in the kindest possible manner so that he hadn't got his hopes up needlessly. Yuuri wasn't exactly in danger of getting his hopes up- if anything, he rammed them down as far as they would go. It was questionable whether he even had any hopes. That said, when he got into the arena he was just as competitive as the rest of them thanks to his constant need to prove himself to everybody watching him from afar and those scrutinising Victor's ability to coach. There were many who said his decision of sudden upheaval to Japan had been a monumental mistake and that he was only corrupting his own chances to win, that Yuuri Katsuki just wasn't worth the time. Yuuri wanted to prove these people wrong, but not as much as he wanted to show Victor that all his work had paid off. This train of thought lit a fire under his ass and he leapt up with renewed vigour to go track Yuri and Victor down to prepare to walk the course together, not signifying JJ with a response. He found them both bickering about Yuri's choice of saddle pad- in Victor's opinion, black was far too dull and he should try to represent Russia a little more. Yuri argued that a bright red would be much too garish and obnoxious and would never suit the colour of his pony anyway. Yuuri stepped between them and ordered them to start behaving in his most commanding tone, the one he used on kids who came to Hasetsu Castle Stables for work experience and forgot to water the horses. Victor slunk away with his tail between his legs to retrieve Jakov so that they could walk together.   
The course wasn't hugely full up, neither was it particularly technical, but Victor was looking mildly perturbed by it and this in turn rubbed off on Yuuri, who began to double check his distances. In doing so he attracted the attention of Yuri, who rolled his eyes theatrically.   
'What's wrong, never walked a course before?' He teased, and Victor stepped in at this moment.   
'Leave him alone,' He smacked Yuri over the head. 'Yuuri, what's up?'  
'Nothing.'  
'Seriously, what is it?'  
'You look worried, is all.'  
'It's very easy for this level. I'm scared I'll underestimate it. I mean, the course designer's not an idiot- maybe he made it easy for exactly that reason.'   
'Overthinking it a little, aren't you?'  
'I don't do overthinking.'  
Yuuri arched an eyebrow but left it at that. He was an overthinker himself, but he didn't think he'd have any issues with finding the course too easy. He wasn't confident enough to get cocky in the first place. They discussed the course a little further and talked through the specific challenges each obstacle presented then headed over to retrieve their readily tacked up horses. They were all relatively near to the beginning, and Yuri and Victor were in close succession to each other, meaning they warmed up a short while earlier than Yuuri, who was left to fend for himself for a while. He ended up talking to Phichit and Celestino to while away the minutes until he was summoned to the warmup ring just in time to see Victor emerging from the ring with an expression that gave away nothing.   
'How'd it go?' Yuuri asked as he passed him.   
'Good. Clear round, obviously. How do you feel?'  
'Fine.'  
'Not nervous?'  
'A bit... Confident that I'll get through it.'  
'Great! I'll watch your round if I can- good luck!'  
Yuuri thanked him and couldn't keep the smile from his face as he moved off to warm up, watching Victor leave with unadulterated joy just from a conversation with him. He had to stop lusting so ostentatiously after Victor if he wanted to keep their relationship on the downlow, but it was a struggle when all he ever wanted to do was run into his arms and stay there for several hours. Unfortunately, this was not to be as in just ten minutes or so he was going to be called into the ring. Victor made a point of very short warmups so as not to take the tickle out of his horses' toes or to overwork them. He liked them to be fresh and still a little jumpy going into the round so that he could be sure they would pick up their feet. This wasn't as necessary with Aria as she picked up her feet anyway in fear of the poles. If ever she knocked one (and Yuuri was sure he'd only seen this phenomenon once, and the moon had looked particularly blue that evening) she spooked violently and genuinely looked as if she thought the ground was about to swallow her whole. Not the bravest horse out of them all, but she sure could jump when Victor was riding her, that was for sure.   
Yuuri watched people coming and going from the ring. Some of them he knew, some of them he vaguely recognised, but many of them were newbies from Spain who wanted to get their first international under their belt and had decided that competing at home would be a good place to start. There were a few getting poles from what he'd overheard in the conversations of the English-speaking riders, but mostly clear rounds so far. There most likely wasn't a chance of the fastest four-faulters going into the jumpoff and so Yuuri knew that should he want to get into it he needed to go clear. This was easier said than done; Eros had become a little sloppy lately with the lack of pressure that training in a familiar environment brought. He intermittently caught rails with his back legs, mostly on the larger oxers. This would be a problem today because even the slightest rub often rolled the pole straight from the cups.   
His name was called and he trotted down through the little corridor to the arena, passing Cris Giacometti on his way in. He smiled and offered a brief hello, to which Cris winked seductively and said he'd see him later, whatever that meant. Victor had probably decided they were going out to get wasted together. If so, Yuuri would not be partaking. He was exhausted.   
He blinked hard to refocus his concentration and listened for the bell. Eros' canter felt like a million dollars today which helped matters when he began to establish what rhythm he could on the approach to the first. He managed to hit exactly the right spot for takeoff and Eros tucked up beautifully underneath him. Yuuri's confidence was soaring through the roof but he kept in mind what Victor had said earlier and didn't allow Eros to get too full of himself, taking a moment to check him and sit him back a little more.   
Victor watched Yuuri's round with joy swelling in his heart. In such a short time he'd come on in leaps and bounds, and not just in terms of his seat either. He'd grown in confidence exponentially both in and out of the saddle. Gone (for the most part) was that shy and anxious Yuuri, replaced by somebody who dedicated himself to doing the best he could and somebody who was no longer terrified of looking people in the eye. To say that Victor was proud would be the understatement of the century. The amount of growth he'd witnessed was truly awe-inspiring. He could watch Yuuri riding for hours the way he was going now with his near-perfect striding (there were still one or two sticky moments) and his clear round that he made look effortless. Out of everybody in the arena, nobody cheered louder than Victor. He dashed off to greet him as he came out looking dazed but over the moon. In the tradition of all coaching Victor had received and therefore through learned behaviour, it was time for some tough love.   
'You need to actually try in this jumpoff, okay? No more consistent clears- it's time to get some higher placings.'   
Yuuri paled a little but nodded obediently.   
'Cool. Let's go get this horse some water and wait for the coursewalk. Tactics talk?'  
'Of course,' Yuuri grinned, walking beside him back to the stable block. There, they both quickly watered Aria (who took a few moments to get over the shock of seeing the light fittings, for whatever reason) and waited for Yuri to return. He did so a few minutes later, chewing his lip and tying Fluffy up so that he could check her legs. Victor was instantly by his side firing questions at him.   
'What's wrong? Did she hit something? Is she lame?'  
'I don't know,' Yuri frowned, squatting down to feel her fetlocks in front. 'She just didn't feel right.'  
'Is she sound?'  
'Yeah, but-'  
'You shouldn't miss the jumpoff if you went clear. Did you?'  
'Yeah.'  
'Jump, then. If she's not lame you should jump.'  
'Are you sure?'  
'Well, are you sure she's sound? No pain whatsoever anywhere?'  
'I don't think she's hurting, she just felt a little more sticky than usual.'  
'Might just not be in the spirit yet- it's been a few weeks.'  
'Yeah...' Yuri still looked skeptical.   
'Are you coming or not? Because we need to go walk the jumpoff.'   
'Okay, I'll jump.'  
Victor patted him on the shoulder and they all walked out together, caught in the wave of competitors flooding towards the entrance gates.   
The jumpoff course was a change from the first round; serious questions were being posed here and it was blatantly designed to catch riders and horses out. The distances were complex and open to interpretation, the angles were harsh and the alternatives not much kinder, the fences were wide- it was a difficult ask. Yuuri gave a tremulous sigh walking the distance to the last, viciously internally debating the merits of lengthening and risking a pole or maintaining the regular rhythm he aspired to have and all but guaranteeing a clear. Like Victor had said, it was time to get on the train and go- this pushed him to decide to lengthen for the six rather than the seven. He knew his horse could do it (half the time Eros took the longer stride without being asked to) but he was concerned that with the height of the final fence coming from the sharp angle of the penultimate jump would be too much and cause Eros to just rub a pole. That alone would be enough to jump it from its cups. He looked to Victor for reassurance but already he was making his way to the stable block. He hurried after him, glancing back at Yuri who was floundering a bit for some unannounced reason. He left him there to whatever grievances he had taken up with the course and tapped Victor on the back to catch his attention.   
'I'm lengthening for the six,' He informed him with a confident voice.   
'Good,' Victor nodded slowly, his expression calculating. 'I mean, your choice.'  
That sounded slightly less promising than Yuuri had hoped for... He took a deep breath and tried to have a little more faith in his own abilities and judgement.   
'I'm doing it,' He reiterated.   
'And I'm glad you're committing to it,' Victor still didn't sound certain and Yuuri could feel the gnawing sense of self-doubt beginning to return. Was he doing something wrong? Was his decision not good enough? He attempted to brush these fears aside as he dusted over his saddle and put Eros' boots back on, hardly dodging the kick aimed at his face when he knelt down to secure them behind. He stood up slowly and tried to calm his nerves, not entirely sure where they had come from after all the work he and Victor had been putting in to stem them. His pressentiments of trepidation had not yet reached astronomical levels but it felt like they had potential to do so. Rather than do the sensible thing and track down Victor for a much-needed hug and talk through the course, he sat alone and wallowed in his anxieties. This wasn't going to help him in any shape or form, he knew, but he was getting in his head and he couldn't do anything other than overthink things yet more. He suffered in silence for a while just thinking about the ramifications of getting the stride wrong. What if he messed up so badly that Eros stopped in front of that whole crowd? What if Eros went crashing through the jump and hurt himself and it was his fault? He already felt a magnitudinal guilt over what had happened to Vicchan- he couldn't face losing another horse to his own stupidity. It had been weeks before he'd been able to face himself in the mirror and a further few months before he could talk to anybody other than his immediate family. He'd even gone so far as to cut all communication with Hasetsu Castle Stables because he was afraid that everybody else saw the same as he did- that it was his fault and he had killed his horse. He should have kept a better eye on Vicchan's health, he should have ridden softer, he should have pulled up the moments things felt wrong... There were a lot of little conditionals like this that Yuuri found himself thinking whenever he remembered the accident, blurring his already hazy recollection of what had happened.   
These toxic thoughts consumed his mindset and he gripped his head between his hands as if that would prevent the inevitable falling apart that would commence any second. At that moment, Victor rounded the corner looking frustrated.   
'Yuuri, you need to be in the warmup ring now, you're in the ring in- oh!' He saw Yuuri sat on a package of bedding with his shoulders heaving and his hands clenched so hard into fists it seemed as if he would cut into his own palm. He bent down to meet his tearful gaze and put a hand either side of his face.   
'What's wrong?'  
Yuuri, unable to say a word through the lump in his throat, shook his head firmly. Victor was unconvinced, as he should be, and he told Yuuri to wait right there for a few minutes before disappearing off in the direction of the warmup area. Yuuri sat and panicked over what the hell was going on- had Victor just pissed off to do his own round? Was he really that apathetic to Yuuri's emotions? Okay, so the competition was international and therefore pretty important, but surely he could spare a few seconds to give comfort to his boyfriend. Was that too much to ask? Yuuri felt like he was being selfish, however ridiculous he knew that was because all he wanted was a few moments of calm. He sat and fretted to himself until Phichit appeared with a cold bottle of water and sat beside him on the bedding. He remained silent, just sitting there and watching him sip water for a while.   
'Victor told me to come,' He said.   
'What about the jumpoff?' Yuuri choked out through his gulping for air.   
'I got two poles. I know, I'm doing pretty well. Anyway, what's up, chook?'  
Yuuri couldn't answer- he was taken over by a fresh wave of panic that gripped at bis throat and pulled at his gut, snatching away his breath and leaving him feeling cold. All he wanted in that moment was Victor, but obviously he had gone to do his round. A dick move but not something he could completely blame him for; he couldn't give up his chances of qualifying for the final just because Yuuri was weak-willed and troubled by his own demons.   
Eventually Victor returned looking considerably more flustered than before. He immediately gathered Yuuri up into a hug, holding him tight as he dissolved into tears. Phichit left to give them some space.   
'Sorry I took so long. They got a bit annoyed about me withdrawing my entry,' Victor apologised and Yuuri froze up.   
'What?' He gasped, his eyes widening.   
'I dropped out and moved you to the end so we can calm you own for it.'   
'I don't want to do it!'  
'Why?'  
'I'm- I'm scared that I'll mess up in front of everyone,' It hurt a little to confess this.   
'If you do badly I'll take responsibility by resigning as your coach.'   
'What? No! I'm used to being blamed for my own failures! Why would you say something lol that, like you're trying to test me?' Yuuri sobbed, his face crumpling and his body slumping as he stepped away from Victor's embrace with a heavy gait.   
'I'm not good with people crying in front of me,' Victor ran a hand through his hair. 'Should I just kiss you or something?'   
Yuuri growled in frustration and flopped back onto the bedding, pulling his knees up in front of himself and wrapping his arms round them. He rested his head on them and took a deep breath. He felt a lot better after crying and Victor's expression when he had begun to cry had been priceless. He'd cried after a show before, but this was the first time he'd cried before and he didn't want it to happen again. Victor was too inexperienced as a coach- it wasn't as if his mental weakness had started just now; he had to be prepared for this kind of thing. What an idiot.   
'Hold my horse while I get on then,' He sighed at last, standing up with a more determined look than ever before painted on his face.   
Victor grinned to himself, knowing he had motivated Yuuri to excel. Hopefully now he would win just as he deserved to after all the hours of work he'd put in. He hadn't been taking it seriously enough and hopefully this had woken him up a bit. They walked together to the warmup ring, where Yuri was looking very vexed as he came out of the main arena.   
'Yura, how'd did it go?' Victor called to him and was answered with a petulant expression.   
'Stopped at the first. I retired.'  
'Really? That's unlike her.'  
'Like I said earlier, she's not right.'   
'I'll be right with you, okay? I just want to watch Yuuri jump. How's the competition looking?'  
'Most people have a pole or two so far.'   
'Yuuri, you'd better go clear,' Victor commented and Yuuri steeled his nerves for it.   
'I need to warm up now,' He announced, leaning down to hug Victor and ignoring the curious stares he got from several fellow competitors before he trotted off and began his warmup routine. Once Eros was feeling supple and ready to go for the warmup he signaled that he was ready and was bustled into the waiting area to watch JJ, the penultimate jumper, get three consecutive stops at a wide oxer. Looked like things weren't going his way. Yuuri tried his best not to relish in this but it did give him a small amount of glee to see JJ, who had offended him earlier, fail. He was sure he could see most of the other riders who were watching smirking and nudging each other. JJ trotted out looking dour and offered nothing but a weak smile in Yuuri's direction.   
'Good luck with the course, newbie,' He left this acid remark in his wake and Yuuri secretly flipped him off before taking up the reins and squeezing Eros into a raunchy canter. With such a high calibre horse it was easy to get a little too excited in the jumpoff, but he wanted to keep his arse as firmly in the saddle as he could for Victor's sake and he didn't think provoking a bucking fit would help with that cause. He deepened his seat and dredged up the same dogged determination that had spurred him back into the saddle in the first place. He whipped Eros up into a minor frenzy and fired him at the first in true Plisetsky style without the long spot to cut down on air time. The rest of the course passed by within the blink of an eye and before he knew it Yuuri was approaching the six-stride line that he'd been so concerned over. He sat up and buried Eros into the first a little to ensure they got a long landing and from there he pushed hard whilst managing to maintain some semblance of a rhythm to rocket over the last with gusto. He missed what the commentator said, and it was all in Spanish anyway so it wasn't like he could understand it, but he reckoned it was positive from the cheer of the crowd. He waved to thank them all and threw his arms around Eros' neck, throwing the reins at him and allowing him to stretch his nose down to the ground as they walked out to the applause of the stadium. Victor was already there and considerably out of breath, suggesting that he had probably run straight from the viewing box reserved for coaches and family, ready with a bottle of water and oozing with praise and a few pieces of constructive criticism.   
'I'm glad you pulled it out of the bag,' He gushed, patting Yuuri's thigh and perhaps holding onto it for a little too long. Yuuri went to dismount but Victor flapped his hands at him in confusion.   
'What are you doing?' He cried, hoisting him back into the saddle. 'Are you just going to do the lap of honour on foot?'  
'Lap of honour?' Yuuri stammered, his heart pounding as he allowed himself to hope for a naive moment.   
'You didn't realise you'd won?'  
'What?'  
'Christ... Early night for you.'  
'I won? Really?' To say Yuuri was ecstatic would be a magnificent understatement.   
'Well, yeah. I mean, you rode incredibly and Yuri and I weren't competing so you had more of a chance.'   
Yuuri stuck his tongue out but he was in too high spirits to care about Victor's ego spiralling out of control as usual. They waited a while for the arena to be set up and the jumps carted away until Yuuri was bustled in to accept his frankly hideous rosette tempered with a gorgeous rug that was hurriedly thrown onto the horse. Victor was stood to the side looking very proud, having forced his way into the arena and refused to leave. Everybody was slightly intimidated by him and so nobody made any complaints about his presence, even when he complained very loudly that he ought to have won just for his first round based on style alone. Yuuri walloped him one over the head before the cameraman accosted him and demanded that he pose for pictures of him and his coach celebrating a win, because pictures of Victor Nikiforov would sell regardless of whether he was on the podium or not. Midway through the compulsory photoshoot Yuuri grew tired and began to stare down at Victor with eyes that he knew had turned gooey and an expression that was equally mushy. He was bored of having to care about that, so he beckoned Victor over and leaned down to grab him by his tie and pull him close. Victor looked both terrified and confused until Yuuri kissed him, smiling against his lips and then leaning forwards to whisper into his ear,  
'That's the only thing I could think of to surprise them as much as winning did,' He murmured in a low voice. 'And to say sorry for you having to lose.'  
'Shut up and kiss me,' Victor chuckled, kissing him back, much to the astonishment of the silenced audience. Yuuri was the first to pull away, sitting up in the saddle and looking dazed. The photographer was just kind of staring blankly them, his finger moving mindlessly to click the camera button every now and then. The other two riders who had made the podium, Cris and Michele Crispino, were also gazing at them in disbelief. Well, Cris just looked more disappointed. Yuuri wondered briefly how this revelation would be received, but in all honesty at that moment he wasn't too fussed because he was about to embark on his lap of honour, which was rather terrifying when sat astride a horse that couldn't keep its head trotting behind Fluffy on a hack. He held on with a grim determination as Eros tanked it round the arena, having to give several sharp tugs to drop to a jog before he ended up running over some poor official. He and Victor reunited and hurried back to the stables with the biggest grins on their faces in light of what had just happened.   
After such an emotionally fraught day, Yuuri felt truly elated in that moment. It was just such a shame that it wasn't going to last long.


	17. Chapter 17

Squish squish. Squelch squelch.   
'Christ, my boots are soaking!' Yuuri complained as they unloaded the horses, having finally returned to Hasetsu Castle Stables after a long and anxious journey back to Japan. It was raining, as it tended to do around this time of the year every now and then, and the ground was smothered by a layer of mud that settled just above four inches in depth. He curled his toes up, his socks wet through and the rest of him faring only marginally better due only to the fact that Victor was attempting to shield him from the torrential rain. His method of towering over him was, unsurprisingly, rather ineffectual and served only to get in Yuuri's way as he led the horses back to their stables. Eros was anxious as ever to return to his hay and this showed in his impatient stamping and occasional defiant toss of his head, attempting to yank the lead rope from Yuuri's hand.   
'Will you shut up for a second?' He growled, shaking the rope threateningly. He had yet to even get into the barn, and the short walk seemed increasingly treacherous as he slid and stumbled about in the mud. Just one wrong move and he would be sent sliding underneath his horse's feet. He hated to admit it but he knew Eros would relish an excuse to step on him in retribution for all the terrible strides and times when he incorrectly felt he deserved a treat for hard work done (even if that work was bucking like a wild thing). He made it across no man's land safely and was into safe, concrete-floored territory and the coarse quiet of the barn punctuated by the pelleting of the rain upon the roof. The tranquil air was disturbed by Yuuri blundering about in search of the light switch and flicking it on so suddenly that it blinded him for a moment. He blinked hard to dispel the flares across his vision and hurried to deposit Eros in his stable so that he could return and retrieve Aria for Victor, who was in charge of unloading tack since he was loathe to allow anybody to do much as breathe on his saddles. Yuuri often wondered why he brought in excess of one saddle to international shows when he only ever rode one horse. He held the vague idea that it was something to do with the minor variation in the colour of his several pairs of boots and his obsession with matchy matchy. He passed a dejected-looking Yuri upon his travel back to the lorry and felt a tug on his heartstrings. All his joy at winning had been overshadowed by Yuri's concern for his horse and there had been a general diffusion of this despondency that had turned down even the corners of Victor's lips.   
'I'm sure she was having an off day,' Yuuri squeezed Yuri's shoulder reassuringly, knowing that this observation was most likely false and definitely did nothing to alleviate Yuri's consternation. It was of utmost importance to the boy that his horse was in fine health and happy, and since this did not appear to be the case he himself could not manage even the barest hint of a smile. The nebulous counsel given by everybody surrounding him had not eased his tension and it was in part to this lack of answers that Yuuri attributed Yuri's misery. Victor followed close behind him with bridles hanging off of every part of his body.   
'Crap!' He squeaked as his personalised Micklem began to slide his shoulder. Yuuri leapt forwards to grab it before everything began to slide downwards in a rush of chaos. He and Victor ended up clinging at each other to prevent the expensive and well-polished leather from picking up any dirt from the floor. They sidled chest to chest down to the tack room, giggling uncontrollably until they could manoeuvre the correct bridles onto their respective hook.   
'You two are disgusting,' Yuri grimaced upon entering behind them to rifle through the large stockpile of supplements and herbal remedies that Yuuko had amassed and stored on the shelves. 'Where's the electrolytes?'  
'Feed room,' Yuuri managed to drag his eyes reluctantly from Victor's face, relishing his smile that was for once not superficial. 'Why? I don't usually feed up this late after a show.'  
'I don't know, I'm thinking maybe she's just tired,' Yuri shrugged, stacking the boxes he'd pulled down back up. Unfortunately he was too short to reach and had to stand on the plaiting stool, which only added to his dour spirits.   
'That won't be the problem,' Victor shook his head, taking on his Instructor Face and putting his hands on his hips. 'She's never pulled a stop because she's tired.'  
Yuri began to look a bit tearful, nodding and tucking his hands into his pockets to distract them from tying together in an anxious knot.   
'Want me to check his legs again?' Yuuri offered in good charity; despite having slightly less experience with horses as compared to Victor, he had plenty of experience with injuries because he wasn't as much of a believer in bubble wrapping each youngster brought in. He couldn't count on even his toes and fingers combined the amount of times he'd had to check a horse over after having come in from a vicious battle in the field. Yuri nodded wordlessly, perhaps not quite trusting his voice not to waver if he verbalised his opinion.   
Yuuri went with him and left Victor to bring in his own horse from the lorry so that he could attempt to run some diagnostics, as it were. He asked Yuri to hold his pony as he didn't trust her not to try something that might hospitalise him. He crouched down and gently ran his hand down the pony's right fore, squeezing at different points before checking her feet with extreme care and attention to detail. He wanted to troubleshoot what was upsetting the pony just as much as her owner did.   
'Ah,' He stood up slowly. 'Her feet are very warm.'  
'Why? What does that mean?' The blood drained from Yuri's face and his voice came out at barely a whisper.   
'Calm down, it might be nothing! Is that normal for her?'  
'No. I mean, they're always normal- I think they're normal.'  
'Right. We can keep an eye on them, but other than that nothing else seems to be wrong. Maybe she's just gone a bit sour.'   
'Sour?'  
'Bored.'  
'But she loves jumping!'  
'I know, but you can have too much of a good thing.'  
'I guess... What should I do about it?'  
'Well, we'll keep an eye on her for a few days and if you're that bothered we can get a chiro and a dentist out. You could try giving her a few days off.'  
'But Hamburg's in a few days!'  
'Your choice. You'll qualify without it.'  
'What's up?' Victor leaned over the door, quite the curious george.   
'I'm not doing Hamburg,' Yuri announced decisively, his expression of determination setting and telling Victor there was no persuasion here. 'Fluffy needs some time off.'  
'It's the horse?'  
'Yeah.'  
'Then you can ride one of mine.'  
'Don't want to.'  
'Rialto? You got on well last time!'  
'I don't want to ride your-'  
'I'll go fiddle around with your entry. You can ride him tomorrow and that will be enough; you're adaptable and the horse is capable enough.'  
Yuri groaned in frustration but put forth no more debate. He knew better than to deny Victor when he was as insistent as he was being now- it was like talking to a brick wall. He couldn't stand to jet off to Germany when his poor neglected pony was so clearly in pain, especially to compete without her; it felt too direct a betrayal to him. He could see, however, that he had no choice in the matter; within a few days he would be riding Victor's horse in Germany. Such a loss of autonomy was certainly to be expected at this level when, though he hated to admit it, he was riding off of Victor's coattails a little. 

 

'You need more leg than that!' Victor cried in despair as Yuri and Rialto crashed through yet another fence. They'd been getting along perfectly well the first time they'd been teamed up, but that was when they couldn't have been jumping any higher than a metre. Now, scaling the heights to a full-up course of 1.45- which wasn't even the height they'd be jumping in Germany- they were dissolving quickly into a catastrophic disaster. To a detached observer there was certainly something highly amusing about watching a skinny, rather uncoordinated kid that didn't rise above 5"3 trying to rein in a leggy 16.3hh without much result. They were still moving far too fast as Rialto wasn't used to having such a gutsy, hands-on rider and Yuri wasn't used to something that needed collection. With Fluffy he just pointed and fired, but with Rialto he was having to use his brain much more and attempt to figure out a stride each time because if he didn't choose one for himself rather than take whatever he was left with in the moment, Rialto slid to a neat stop. It was as if this youngster was trying to take Yuri down a peg and tell him off for chasing too hard without putting in the effort on his own behalf. This was part of the reason Victor had paired them up- he knew full well he had several horses that Yuri would fare much better with, but none of them would improve his riding as much. Hopefully he would come away with more experience that he could transfer into riding Agape. This was his motivation as a coach, but he couldn't help but feel a great sense of pity that by far outweighed his desire for Yuri to excel. He could see that he was becoming irate and he understood that it was frustrating to have a horse out of action, especially when it was his only horse. Despite riding at a top level, Yuri had just one horse and he wasn't exactly rich. It was Victor that had essentially taken him in several years ago and had railed upon Jakov to train him into the rider he now was. He allowed for the memory to distort his vision so as to pretend he couldn't see Yuri rolling another oxer...

Yuri had been eleven years old and slaving away day after agonising day for Jakov in return for being permitted the occasional ride on one of his steadier horses. Jakov had recently retired and at the time was living vicariously through his students, of which he had several. Victor Nikiforov was his golden pupil, no doubt- at the tender age of fourteen he had won dressage Europeans on his £20,000 horse named Makkachin. This horse was unquestionably his horse of a lifetime and the two had soared together for many years, both literally and metaphorically, after a career change to showjumping. They held plenty of championship titles and Victor was now 23 and reigning gloriously above the rest of his teammates. There was some jealousy and plenty of rivalry, meaning he was occasionally scowled upon when he boasted (as he was often inclined to do, although Jakov saw it as only natural when he possessed such talent) and yet his easy charm and presence of character meant that nobody could dislike him. Upon being ordered to take a stable hand out on a hack he had been delighted for the chance to show off to somebody, but he had instead been met with a caustic and belligerent eleven-year-old who had been unimpressed by his success, claiming that he couldn't be all that good if he still had a coach. Victor had laughed in his astonishment and asked him if he ever rode competitively himself. Yuri had admitted that he did not, but only for want of opportunity and a horse of his own. Victor had struck a deal there and then that if he won an upcoming local show (on one of Victor's castoff ponies that Jakov had kept around for no discernible reason) then Victor would help him become an international rider. He had, in the end, kept his promise and now Yuri was making world records on a horse that Victor had paid for- all this in spite of falling off at said local show before the class even began and being rushed to hospital with a broken rib. Victor had still been persuaded to help him after Yuri had demanded to get back on the very next day and prove that he could ride a course just as well as anybody else. Jakov had made a fuss, as he tended to do so in his aging and stubborn mindset, particularly as Yuri was so abrasive and refused to take criticism. He had relented after Victor had appealed to him through protestation by refusing to perform any stable duties until Yuri was promised regular lessons. Skip forwards a year or so and Victor was buying him Quadify This and they were beginning to win things. It had been hugely gratifying for Victor to see his efforts pay off, but the same could not be said for Yuri. While he was immensely grateful and showed it in his own fashion, he had set his aims upon higher aspirations; higher fences, longer courses, larger titles. In the end it had come to a halt rather suddenly when his beloved pony had suffered from sporadic colic, of which the final bout had finished him off. Yuri had been inconsolable for the longest time until dragged by his grandfather to an auction of scraggly moor ponies. Yuri had there purchased OL Agape for a mere £700, her breeders having expected something much larger out of OL Aphrodite. The mare had been cast aside and Yuri had fallen instantly in love with the scruffy German riding pony, who had been partially mistaken for one of the moor ponies being sold off cheap as chips. He'd paid for her with all the cut of prize money that he got (he gave most to Jakov and paid for Victor's fuel) and his grandfather had charitably agreed to pay transportation prices. Victor had just about had a coronary when Yuri brought to the yard a lunatic pony with feathers, of all things, and that looked like it hadn't seen clippers in the entire duration of its life. He had refused to acknowledge that actually, the pony's passport was pretty decent, because he claimed that any pony that had the audacity to bite him on the arse would be no friend of his. As it turned out, Yuri had a keen eye for talent and within a year or so they had completely overtaken the circuit and Yuri had defeated Victor by taking the title of Europeans champion and entreating everybody else to forget Victor's ancient victory.   
Still Victor had supported him until Jakov had set him loose to be an instructor himself, having dubbed him capable enough after securing a world number one spot. Every now and then there would be a threat and some mild contention, but never enough that Victor slid further down the rankings than second for more than a few weeks or so whilst those underneath him fought like a pack of dogs. Some day, he was sure, Yuri would be amongst them and would inevitably come out on top, thus superseding Victor as champion and becoming the most accredited showjumper in history. He was already well on his way, considering he was less than half the age of several of the riders he was currently competing against. Victor was not vain enough to hate the idea of this- he could, at least, claim some credit in that he had been the one to set Yuri up for these great achievements and had bought him his first horse. That said, he still felt a little like Mrs. Norris attempting to steal all of Yuri's glory when he'd worked so painstakingly hard for all of it without complaint over the hours of seemingly endless chores and having to listen to Victor feed his own ego. Now he faced Victor being hopelessly head over heels for the new student he had been in part abandoned for. After all these years of Victor hounding him up to the top, he had been essentially dropped, and with devastating speed. In fact, Victor hadn't even told Yuri about his plans to set off for Japan. He'd just upped and left without so much as a by or leave. Come to think of it, he'd let Yuri down a lot lately and this was perhaps weighing on his subconscience enough that it formed a greater part of his reasoning for lending Yuri a horse so that he didn't miss out on an opportunity to impress.   
These thoughts tumbled through Victor's mind and convinced him that there ought to be some sort of self-improvement on his behalf for Yuri's sake if he wanted to retain his status as a likeable charmer. Added to that he got the feeling that if he didn't supply Yuri with a little more guidance and support he would be forced to witness him falling behind and not pushed to his most extreme measures. That in itself would be a tragedy, for Yuri Plisetsky succeeding was something the entire world deserved to see, and something that boy damn well deserved to make happen.


	18. Chapter 18

'I'm here today with current reining champion, Victor Nikiforov,' The interviewer gestured to Victor, who was stood with Yuri on one side looking bitter and Yuuri on the other, looking so rigid that for all the watchers knew he could have been a waxwork if it weren't for the occasional slow blinking and glances in Victor's direction. 'Tell me, Victor. To what do you attribute your immense success?'  
'I have good horses,' He spewed out first the typical nonsense, as if it wasn't him as a rider that brought out the best in subpar horses. 'And keeping them at Hasetsu Castle Stables means they've all been in top form! Really, if you're searching for a horse, there is the place.'  
'And what about your pupils? What's it like to compete against them?'  
'Wonderful. I get to live in fear and excitement knowing they will some day match up to me.'   
'Yuri,' The interviewer directed her piercing gaze towards the Russian Yuri so as not to cause any confusion. 'You're not riding your horse today- you're riding Victor's. Any reason for this?'  
'Fl- Agape,' He corrected himself, not wanting the entire world to know his pony's nickname. 'Is having a few days off to rest.'   
'No lameness? People have been speculating after you retired in Ma-'  
'Not lame. Just needs a break.'  
'Of course. Well, I have to mention that you're just sixteen and already competing at this level- what's that like?'  
'There's a lot of pressure,' He confessed. 'Because people expect to see great things.'  
'As I'm sure they will,' The interviewer beamed before honing in on what everybody had really been buzzing about for the past few days. 'Now, the awards ceremony in Madrid.'  
'Ah,' Victor braced himself to take the brunt of these no doubt uncomfortable questions, but the interviewer cast her sights upon Yuuri. This was not looking promising.   
'A friendly kiss?' The interviewer suggested and Victor had to fight not to snatch the microphone and answer her questions himself. When he saw Yuuri's stony expression, however, he realised there was no need.   
'Did it look friendly?' He raised an eyebrow. 'I mean, I don't think friends tend to kiss.'  
'So it wasn't?'  
'Open to interpretation, apparently.'  
The interviewer looked less than impressed and Victor had to bite his lip so as not to burst into fits of laughter.   
'Then can you confirm whether you are in a relationship or not?'  
Yuuri sought Victor's eye and was answered with a gentle nod.   
'I would've thought that kiss confirmed it for us,' He shrugged nonchalantly and the interviewer grinned; this was just the scoop she needed. When at last she could bear to leave them to prepare for the day ahead, Victor slipped an arm round Yuuri's waist and kissed his cheek affectionately.   
'Aren't you brave?' He cooed and Yuri mimed vomiting before making himself scarce in case they should graduate past kissing cheeks. He had been forced to bear witness to some questionable things and had learnt to take very early cues to leave.   
'I definitely deserve to not have to muck out for the next week,' Yuuri answered, only partially in jest.   
'That I can't promise you.'  
'Then you could at least-' Yuuri was cut off by his phone ringing. The display name flashed up as Yuuko. 'Hang on.'  
He picked the call up and dashed off to find somewhere a little quieter, ending up in the vacant (for now) warmup arena.   
'Yuuri, is Victor around?'  
'Umm, I can go find him. Why, what's up?'  
'It's Makkachin.'  
Yuuri felt a coldness settle in the pits of his stomach. Something about her tone and the higher-than-usual pitch of her voice didn't sit right with him.   
'What's happened?' He demanded.   
'He's got colic. The vet's here now and if Victor's happy with it, he can go into surgery immediately but it's not looking good.'  
'Shit,' Yuuri gasped, clasping his hand against his heart and fighting to keep his breath from snatching his words away. 'I'll get him now.'  
He all but sprinted back to Victor, thrusting the phone into his hands without any explanation and watching as his expression grew grave and his face paled. Yuuri could do nothing but watch on as Victor clenched so tightly at the phone that his knuckles turned white and nodded furiously at everything that was being said.   
'Do it,' He said the minute he had all the information. 'I'll get the soonest flight out. Thanks.'  
He passed Yuuri back his phone and it would be remiss of him not to notice just how much his hand was trembling. Yuuri took it and squeezed it reassuringly, conveying all the love and warmth that he could through this small gesture, knowing that no words could provide any alleviation of the terror that losing a horse brought- potentially losing a horse, anyway.   
'I'll call a cab, you go get your things,' He let go and gave Victor a gentle push to send him on his way.   
'Right. Umm, if anything goes wrong you ask Jakov or Cris or- oh, and make sure Yuri shortens his stirrups enough, and don't forget to-'  
'I'll be fine,' Yuuri assured him, hugging him tightly before setting him loose to go and gather together all that he needed. 'Do you want me to get anything for you?'  
'All I need is my passport and wallet.'  
'Are they in the lorry?'  
'Yeah, I can get them.'  
'No, you sit here and wait for updates and I'll get them.'  
'Thank you. Really.'  
Yuuri kissed his cheek and dashed off to retrieve the lorry keys from Jakov- they were still on indefinite suspension from entering the lorry without a responsible adult- and hurriedly explaining to him what was happening. He look truly sorry to hear that Makkachin was sick; he had seen him and Victor grow up together, so it was of course only natural to be feeling this sort of remorse. Yuri overheard and turned a pallid shade of grey, no doubt recalling his own pony's battle with colic- a battle that had been lost. Yuuri rushed to convince him that Makkachin was going to be just fine as he had the best vet performing surgery on him as they spoke. This did nothing to relieve Yuri's tension; in fact, he looked even ashier a grey and was forced to announce his departure to clean tack as a method of concealing his emotional excess. Yuuri scooted down to the lorry and rifled through every single compartment to find what he was looking for. He was just about to ring for a taxi when he realised he spoke not a word of German. Cursing, he stumbled around until he found Victor again, having moved himself from where they'd been before to the stable block where he was muttering to Jakov about this and that. He'd also managed to get himself a coffee in the time Yuuri had been gone and he was clinging to it with desperation, praying that the caffeine might lend him a moment's sanity.   
'Wallet, passport,' Yuuri handed them over. 'I can't speak German, but I'm assuming you can so you'll need to call yourself a cab.'  
'Thank you so much,' Victor hugged him hard, finding that nothing else could be more consoling in his grief. He eventually stepped away and forced himself to face the reality of the situation- he had a flight to catch and a horse to rehab. It was going to be a long few days, and he hoped for all the right reasons, or as right as they could be. He called for a cab to be dispatched and met them outside the front, not even having taken his spurs off yet. Realising he'd never in a million years be able to travel in them he simply left them in the cab, not feeling comfortable enough to run them back to somebody who could keep them safe for him.   
'When's the next flight to Saga Airport?' He inquired at the information desk, praising his mother's conviction that he ought to know at least foundation-level German so that he could get by. Having grown up speaking Russian, most other languages came relatively easily to him and it seemed he had a propensity for learning them. This tended to come in rather useful with a job that had him flying all over the world.   
'There's one in three hours,' The man behind the counter informed him in a surprised manner. He was obviously confused by a man in such curious attire storming up to the desk and asking in a strong Russian accent how he could get to Japan. Nevertheless, he booked Victor into the flight- first class, naturally- and within minutes Victor was fluttering over to security. With no bags it made it slightly easier to get through, although at security he had a hoofpick that he'd forgotten to remove from his pocket confiscated, much to his alarm. He wasn't entirely sure how a hoofpick could bring down a plane, but such were the security measures these days.   
The three hours transcended time itself. They dragged on for millennia. He had all but grown a beard by the time he boarded the plane. Give it any longer and his hair would return to the length he'd worn it at as a teenager. Even as the plane touched down he was wondering if perhaps he was stuck in a suspension of time and this was a perpetual loop designed to torture him. He hailed a cab from the taxi rank outside and asked them to take him to the vet surgery he'd been sent the name of. It would have been much cheaper and probably quicker to take the train to Hasetsu and get a cab from there instead, but the feeling of sitting docile on a train platform waiting was undoubtedly going to be far too much to handle. His leg bounced with adrenaline and he gripped the seat hard, letting go only to check his phone for updates every other minute. Yuuko had texted him a few minutes after he'd touched down to inform him that Makkachin was undergoing surgery as she spoke and would probably be out by the time he got there. He only hoped that if anything were to go drastically wrong he would make it in time to say goodbye; that much, at least, he owed to his longtime best friend. In even his loneliest, most inconsolable hours Makkachin had been a welcome respite from the pressure thrust upon him whether consciously or not by all his peers. He didn't even take into account the pressure from his parents; he would always feel that, even today. Their eyes would always haunt him, pinned to his back and their drilling remarks and thinly-veiled criticisms would forever resonate in his ears. This in itself motivated him to achieve despite their constant putdowns and fury that he had not remained in the discipline they had so excelled in. They had, truthfully, wanted a daughter. He saw this often in his mother's eyes and it was oft hinted at in his father's offhanded tone. They had wanted a daughter because they regarded women as far better as dressage. Part of him agreed with them on the grounds that in showjumping alone men tended to hunch and fold their shoulders inwards, but this he had never witnessed in dressage. This was the reason behind his rod-straight back (and they had secured a narrow length of wood to his back many a time to force this) even over a fence. They had also inspired in him their viciously competitive nature. He could still clearly recall the days spent sat at the sidelines beside them listening to their vitriolic comments regarding the competition. Often they would turn their gaze to their son and tell him if he ever so much as dared to ride a transition that backwards they would not hesitate to sell his horses. They had been forced to sell them in the end, as it went, when Victor had dived into the world of showjumping. They had been entirely unable to comprehend his choice, and as such had offered no protestations when he had moved in with Mila for a time. He had kept the money from selling his horses and bought his own apartment that even now was sat in Russia awaiting his return. The thought of a return was cold to him. He did not want to leave Japan; here he had found a true home and had made his own family, small and disjunct though it was. He had found somewhere that didn't feel like a display home- he had found a place that contained somebody with whom he wanted to stay. He didn't know how things would work out after the season was over, but he hoped he and Yuuri could make it work, distance aside. He enjoyed coaching him but if he won Longines (as undoubtedly he would- Victor had a staunch belief in this) then there would be no reason for him to stay. Yuuri wouldn't need a coach anymore. Victor wouldn't be needed anymore.   
As égoïste as it appeared, Victor relished the concept of actually being needed. He had never had younger siblings and so having horses had been a wonderful escape for him. Being depended on by these docile (for the most part) creatures gave him a sense of peace that he had a place in the world. And now... The horse that had provided him with this hideaway was in mortal peril. He knew not what had caused this outbreak of colic but what he did know was that he felt an immense guilt for leaving him, even though it couldn't be helped and he wasn't to know that anything like this should occur.   
These thoughts bit at him like a pestilential swarm of insects as he paid the driver and dashed into the vet's surgery. He was met by a distressed-looking Yuuko and his heart leapt to his throat, pounding erratically and choking him.   
'Is he okay?' He managed to force out, his voice emerging deflated and high-pitched.   
'I think so,' Yuuko nodded and yet he did not allow himself a sigh of relief. There was great danger in allowing himself relief- there was always the chance for infection, complications, a second attack... He couldn't allow himself to get his hopes up more than was necessary.   
'Can I see him?'  
'Of course.' Yuuko nodded. They went through to a spacious stable where the vet was just finishing off a bandage around Makkachin's stomach. The horse itself was knocked out on sedatives, the only implications that he was alive being an occasional snore and the infrequent twitching of an ear.   
'Mr. Nikiforov, I presume.' The vet stood up and removed his gloves, tucking them into a pocket. 'He should be fine. There was a blockage in his gut- lower intestine, very close to a rupture. Peristalsis, as you know, does not stop in a horse and this caused a few ulcers. I have taken out the affected part of the intestine but if he suffers a repeat attack I'm afraid there will be nothing left to do. My secretary will assist you with paperwork and fees.'   
'Thank you.' Victor nodded, and then he was crouching down beside his poor horse. 'What's the precedent now, then?'  
'We'll keep him here for a few days to monitor his condition,' The vet replied, and something in his tone suggested he didn't have time to hang around.   
'I'll let him rest, then.' Victor stood up slowly, his knees cracking as usual. 'Can I come visit?'  
'Whenever you want.'  
'Okay,' He took a deep breath to steady his voice. 'Thank you so much, Yuuko. For telling me and for, you know, everything...'  
She just smiled and patted his shoulder reassuringly. She'd lost horses before, and she knew that almost losing one was a hardship in itself. 

 

                   Meanwhile, things were going a tad pear-shaped in Germany. Yuuri was having trouble trying to control a panic-stricken Yuri, who was entirely convinced that Agape was direly ill due to paranoia setting in after the news of Makkachin had been broken.   
'What if she has colic too?' He lamented, clasping his hands together in exasperation.   
'Yuri, your pony does not have colic.' Jakov was forced to intervene and send him off to retrieve Rialto so that he could warm up.   
'Poor kid,' Yuuri sighed, shortening his stirrups by a hole or two after having witnessed Eros already jumping around in the stable. The tense atmosphere had no doubt rubbed off on the easily-impressionable gelding and he was now raring to go, meaning Yuuri was in for a fun round. Matters were not helped when Yuri returned with a look of irritation etched onto his face.   
'I still don't get why I have to ride this stupid horse,' He was grumbling to himself as he led Rialto down to the warmup ring, struggling to hold the excitable horse back as he spooked this way and that. It wasn't specifically the horse- Rialto was a talented and well-produced ride- but rather the fact that it wasn't his own. He and Fluffy had been an unstoppable team after having worked through so many obstacles together and come through so much adversity in their journey. After having saved the pony from a destiny comprised of being kicked and whipped to death in a shoddy riding school or having her mouth torn apart by some bratty kid who had no idea what they were doing, he'd felt a firm duty to keep the pony safe. They'd quickly become staunch friends and had remained that way ever since, meaning to ride any other horse felt distinctly traitorous. Despite this, he was determined to make it work nonetheless. He had too much riding on his succession in this tour to leave anything to chance. He knocked a few poles in the warmup and his nerves were running higher and higher as his competitors all stared at him in disbelief. It wasn't even the poles- it was the change in horse. Nobody had expected this, because in every interview Yuri had ever given he said he would never be somebody with more than one horse. He hated to be viewed as whimsical and as reversing his one-horse policy, but he would have to deal with the stigma until he could explain away his sins. For now, he had to concentrate on getting the best ride he could given the circumstances. Rialto didn't seem to be thinking along the same line as him, unfortunately. Here was where Yuri's inexperience showed; he wasn't used to a horse that lacked concentration, as both Agape and Quad (his previous ride that had unfortunately died due to colic) had matched him in levels of grit and determination. It was hard to keep Rialto in the little 'box' that Victor liked to talk about. He could hear his words even now, talking about the stages of training and yelling at him to 'keep him in a box!'   
He still didn't understand the concept of the box, as Rialto was meant to be going forwards, not remaining in one place, as a box would imply. He needed freer and more natural paces to clear a fence, right? Not the intense collection that Victor had been forcing him to work on. That hadn't helped them with their mortifying habit of dropping poles like flies. Far too soon Yuri was being called into the arena.   
'Yuri, davai!' Yuuri called to him, as had become custom for him. Yuri nodded curtly and trotted into the ring, his nerves like a fire in his belly. He didn't put enough leg on asking for a walk to canter, being so used to Fluffy being gone before he even so much as thought about a transition, and as a result of this lack of enforcement he got a jumpy trot that he had to rein back so he could push Rialto into a canter.   
'Just entering the ring is Yuri Plisetsky,' The commentator announced. Yuri's German was sketchy at best but he could understand what they were saying, more or less. 'Riding Victor Nikiforov's 'In The Rialto', an eight year old gelding who he has been given the ride on whilst Agape, his usual mount, takes a few days off. That's Yuri Plisetsky, coming into the first.'  
Yuri knew the stride was going to be shitty the second he felt how crap his line was, but there was no turning back now. As Victor often said, it was commit or land in shit. He kicked on and, by some miracle, the top rail managed to stay up. He bounced the second, though it clung to the cups with a ferocious tenacity, and rolled the third one so hard that it was clearly god's intervention that he didn't knock it down. He wasn't religious, but perhaps that would change his perspective on things. About halfway through the round (still clear, unfathomably enough), Rialto began to lose the novelty of being back in the stadium with a new rider. His head began to drop and his paces lengthened yet slowed up considerably.   
'Come on, you stupid animal,' He snapped, giving the horse a sharp kick and half-halting perhaps a little too harshly. 'You can dick about all you want in the jumpoff, just please go clear!'  
Unfortunately, Rialto was not a native Russian speaker and didn't seem to understand a word he was saying. Or perhaps he did, because it was as if in defiance that he became obstinately disunited through the combination and crashed the back bar of the oxer coming out so hard that Yuri was surprised it didn't snap in half. Things were just going swimmingly. It was difficult to convince himself that things were going to plan, let alone the horse he was riding, who had now decided that everything was over after that one pole and was now throwing them down with reckless abandon. They finished on a humiliating 19 faults, with three for time penalties. Never in Yuri's life had he received time penalties, and it wasn't a feeling he was partial to. Furious with himself and in part blaming Victor's questionable decision-making, he forced himself to pat Rialto in a superficial display of pride that he'd made it round the course before removing himself from the scene faster than was probably humanly possible. 

'Don't be upset.' Yuuri consoled Yuri by handing him a can of Coke he'd retrieved from the minibar of the hotel they were staying in until they left the following morning. 'I mean, you've only ridden him a few times. No need to be disheartened, okay? You can pull it back next time.'  
'That's easy for you to say!' Yuri lamented, throwing the Coke onto the bed and folding his arms across his chest defensively. 'You didn't get any poles!'   
'I was on my own horse.'  
'Yeah, but you can't ride it anyway!'  
'Touché. Right, I'm going to tell you a story that you are not to repeat to anyone.' Yuuri sat down beside him on the luxurious bed and made him swear into strict confidence. 'At my first show, do you know what happened?'  
'You fell off, probably.'  
'Worse.'  
'What the hell is worse than falling off?' Yuri was in disbelief, his eyes wide open and his jaw slack.   
'I knocked eight poles. Out of ten fences.'  
Yuri's jaw dropped and it took a few seconds for the laughter to begin, but begin it did and soon it was out of control.   
'Typical,' Yuuri rolled his eyes. 'Just typical- I open up to you with the expectation that it will make you feel better about your round and all you can do is laugh at me.'  
Yuri gave no response other than to laugh harder, wheezing about the poles and how unbelievably stupid Yuuri had to be to only keep two fences up. As somebody who had never in his life before that day received more than 12 faults, he simply couldn't comprehend how this could even be remotely possible.   
'Whatever,' Yuuri grumbled. 'I'll go back to my room and you can tell Victor how your ride went.'  
'Nooo!' Yuri whined, throwing his hands into the position of prayer. 'Please can you tell him? He won't mind so much if he hears it from you.'  
'Why don't you want to tell him?'  
'He'll be angry that I got so many poles. He'll say it's embarrassing for him as a coach.'  
'No he won't.'  
'Yes he will! Just because he's completely in love with you and thinks you can do no wrong he'll never tell you anything like that, but he would to me.'  
'You're overreacting- you're tired. Get some sleep and maybe you'll see things clearer in the morning,' Yuuri directed, leaving him to sleep and flicking the lights off before slipping out and down the hall to his own room, where he called Victor with immediacy. Victor picked up instantly and it was immensely relieving to hear his voice.   
'Hi,' His low tones echoed in the bad reception Yuuri had.   
'Hey.' Yuuri felt a stupid grin crawling across his lips. 'How're things holding up your end?'  
'Good. Makkachin's going to be fine- he had the surgery, now it's just a waiting game. I don't know if I'll make it to Cannes, though; I can't bear to leave him like this. He's all bandaged up and sedated, it's awful. Imagine what it would be like if he died!'  
Yuuri was accosted by his own memory of losing Vicchan all those years ago, still fresh enough to rub salt into his wounds.   
'I don't have to,' He said quietly, his voice still trembling after all this time.   
'Oh god, I'm sorry,' Victor rushed to apologise. 'I didn't think about it.'  
'No, it's fine. You weren't to know.'  
'I should've thought about it, though. Anyway, how did things go?'  
'Well... I got a stupid pole in the jumpoff, but clear first round. Yuri... Well, Yuri didn't do so great.'  
'Christ.'  
'Nineteen faults.'  
Yuuri could hear Victor's sharp intake of breath and he had to admit he wasn't surprised when Victor took a long time to reply.   
'How did he take it?' Victor eventually manage to force out, his voice not as even as usual.   
'How do you think? He thought you'd be angry with him.'  
'He's right.'  
'He did try, to be fair to him, I just don't think he's at the level of riding Rialto competitively yet. Maybe after more training and... It's just too much horse for him right now.'  
'I suppose you're right. Hopefully by Cannes he'll have Fluffy back in work, because he is not keeping the ride of Rialto.'  
'How is she?'  
'Grumpy as ever. Tried to bite my head off when I checked on her!'  
'That's promising. Her personality is returning.'  
'Sure. Anyway, isn't it really late over there?'  
'Not too late. Not late enough that I can't stay up talking to you.'  
'You're flying home tomorrow, you can talk to me then!'   
'Aww, but I miss you now! I don't need to sleep.'  
'Sleep. Then when I see you when you're home you won't look like you got punched in the face.'  
Yuuri pouted to himself, humorously offended by Victor's cruel jokes.   
'But if I'm tired it means I'll want to go to bed, meaning you can come with me and wake me up...'  
'Keep talking all night.'


	19. Chapter 19

Yuuri had clean forgotten about Victor's idea of getting him a youngster until it was mentioned in passing one day during a lesson, and then it had seemed to take root in Victor once more and he'd been fixated on it ever since. So much, in fact, that he'd contacted a breeder friend of his back in Russia (he claimed all the best horses came from Russia- not that he was biased, of course) and had asked him to send over a horse. To Yuuri, buying a horse unseen was entirely rash, especially after he'd overheard how much Victor was paying- he'd learnt a minute amount of Russian after having to listen to Yuri and Victor and Jakov all the time. He certainly understood numbers, because most of the time they were discussing prices of horses everybody had bought and prize money. They were awaiting its arrival now before they jetted off to Monaco in a few weeks' time, and Yuuko was more excited than anybody else. That woman loved her youngsters and to have such a high-class horse coming in with a passport name longer than the list of its predecessors even Yuri's interest was piqued. Two days before it was due to arrive, however, Victor got a troubling phone call. Yuuri could tell this from the way he'd had to leave the kitchen where they'd been sitting playing Mahjong and was now hovering in the hallway looking concerned. When he returned, Yuuri stood up and abandoned their game.   
'What's wrong?' He frowned, never liking to see Victor anything other than cheerful because it only happened during catastrophes.   
'The breeder shipped out the wrong horse,' Victor replied, disbelief in his tone and irritation in his expression.   
'The wrong horse? How is that possible?'   
'I don't know!' Victor lamented, pinching the bridge of his nose as he was oft seen to do when frustrated in this manner. 'He wasn't actually around so there was a mixup.'  
'Right.'  
'We have two options- wait for them to sort it out and get the original horse or take a huge gamble and get what we're given.' From Victor's expression, Yuuri could tell he was definitely in favour of the former.   
'It kind of feels like fate... If it's okay with you, I'd prefer to just take the horse they sent. It seems a little unfair to send it back now after such a long journey.'   
'You're sure?'  
'I'm sure.'  
'Then I suppose we wait and we pray that the horse is just as good.'

The horse, in Victor's opinion, was not 'just as good'. It wasn't anywhere near as good and you could tell this just by looking at it; this was no warmblood- this was a stocky sport horse with a thick grey coat scattered over with faint dapples and a head so large you'd think it had been taken from a giant bust. Everybody gathered round the horse and for a good few minutes there was a resonant silence that blanketed all of them.   
'Not much of a looker,' Yuuko spoke up first.   
'It looks like a cart horse!' Victor wailed hideously, throwing the back of his hand to his forehead theatrically. Before he could protest any further Yuuri was taking the horse from the trailer driver's hands and giving the offending creature a rub on his neck, cooing at the great beast gently and kissing his nose in delight.   
'Oh no,' Victor breathed, aghast.   
'This horse is my baby,' Yuuri declared firmly, eyeballing the small group up. 'And if anybody dares to so much as allude to the fact that he's ugly- which he's not- I will kill them.'  
Victor sighed heavily and held his hands up in surrender, still muttering under his breath to rue the day he'd even given Yuuri the option to keep the wrong horse. He watched his already lovesick boyfriend leading the horse down to the quarantine paddock, all but tucking him in and reading him a storybook.   
  'I'm sure we can still trade,' Victor suggested, knowing full well he would be subjected to an ice cold glare, which he was. 'I was expecting something showstopping, you know? This horse is, well... Okay, don't get angry, but you have to admit he's not much of a looker.'  
Yuuri shot him another furious stare, covering the horse's ears to ensure he didn't hear these insults. He busied himself with checking his new horse over, running his hands down its legs and checking its teeth and eyes until he could give it a full bill of health. He chased down Yuuko who had taken the passport and flicked through it, knowing Victor would have an aneurysm if he saw the contents. The breeding history contained only the dam and sire; 'Dolly' and 'Pieter', who he could tell weren't exactly high prestige showjumpers. The horse's name would probably cause the most grief- it was just one single word, and not a dramatic one either. Horses like Derea and Valegro could get away with those single words because they were interesting and unique, so they were tied only to that horse. The horse's name was 'Ice', possibly one of the most generic names that could be given to a grey. He actually thought it was really cute, but then again he was biased now because he'd fallen in love with the horse the moment he'd seen it emerging clumsy and awkwardly down the ramp of the trailer, tripping over its own feet as it went. There was something about Ice's chunky build, dinner-plate hooves and docile nature that gave off a kindly nature and, being used to Eros' highly strung ways, Yuuri found this to be a great relief. He didn't care that it was hugely likely he'd never make it anywhere with this horse- it was nice to have something on the yard with a more trainable attitude and that he could ride without having his life flash before his eyes every time he asked for a canter transition. He quickly placed the passport in the passport box and returned to the quarantine paddock where Yuri was sat on the fence staring at Ice with an unreadable expression.   
  'What do you think?' Yuuri tempted fate by asking; he was sure Yuri would have the same sentiments as Victor about this hairy monstrosity hoovering up the grass.   
  'Looks like an eventer,' Yuri commented quietly, his eyebrows knitting together in consternation. Surprisingly, Yuuri found himself agreeing. Since he'd been brought up on showjumpers he was used to the fine build of warmbloods and thoroughbreds, not this. Ice's legs certainly seemed as if they'd hold up better hitting fences and galloping on hard ground for so long a period of time. He knew if he ever did that with Eros (and the thought was preposterous) he knew that without a doubt he'd need a vet by the end for those spindly, sensitive tendons. Ice just seemed hardier all round, which would be a relief.   
  'Maybe you can take him eventing one day,' He offered, and Yuri grinned excitedly.   
  'I'd like that,' He replied, jumping down from the fence and striding right up to Ice to pat him generously on the shoulder. 'I'm not stupid. I know I'll grow out of Fluffy soon, I just don't want to take a good horse like her eventing because I'll feel guilty.'  
Yuuri pretended not to hear Yuri's slight of tone, instead nodding sagely and offering Ice a polo from deep within his pockets. The horse whickered softly and dived straight for the treat, crunching it between his teeth and nodding his head up and down in appreciation.   
'I hope you don't mind ever having anything but a happy hacker,' Victor called in passing, still bitter. Yuuri and Yuri simultaneously flipped him off, both taken in by the great brute. Yuuri especially was determined to force his boyfriend feel the same way. 

 

'Are you angry with me?' Victor pouted as he plugged the clippers in, glancing briefly across at Yuuri who was on hand with the twitch should it be necessary. Victor had insisted that Ice had to be fully clipped, have his feathers removed and have his mane and tail pulled before he'd even look at the thing twice. The evening before and most of that morning throughout training, Yuuri had been startlingly brusque in his manner (or as brusque as he could ever be).   
'No,' Yuuri mumbled, turning the twitch over in his hands and not meeting Victor's eyes.   
'Okay...' Victor kind of got the feeling that if he assumed that Yuuri wasn't mad he'd get in trouble.   
'Okay, I might be,' Yuuri confessed, frowning and almost dropping the twitch as he continued to distract his hands with it. 'You called my horse a happy hacker.'  
'I didn't mean it!'  
'Still.'  
'If anything, it's a compliment. People pay lots of money for a safe plod these days, you know.'  
Yuuri shot Victor a dry look but pushed the matter no further. He wasn't genuinely mad, but he was irritated by how dismissive everybody was being of his new horse. He wasn't blind- he, too, could see that Ice wasn't exactly a stunning and expressive warmbloods that would take him round the top tracks. In all honesty, jumping above 80cm seemed a push given that his belly was almost equal to his height. He didn't care though; he did love Eros in his own way, but he felt that he could actually form an emotional connection with this horse, which would make it so much easier to produce a partnership that he could rely on.   
  'There, doesn't that look much better?' Victor interrupted his train of thought, brushing the last of the stray hair away and wiping a hand across his forehead. He stepped back to admire his masterpiece; he'd removed every last bit of excess coat and pulled the horse's name and tail so that he now looked slightly less like a slaughter horse. He was stocky, but less so now that he'd been de-fluffed and his feathers had been removed. They might make something of this horse yet...  
  'Right, you find a saddle and in two days you can have a ride, okay?' He squeezed Yuuri's shoulder, not wanting to get any further into his bad books. 'You can have a little plod around.'  
He wasn't helping himself any further. Yuuri shot him yet another glare for use of the word 'plod' and he threw his hands up in surrender.   
  'Okay, okay, I'm sorry!' He chuckled, trying to pull Yuuri in for a hug, but before he was able to Yuuri had ducked out the way and was hugging his horse instead. 'Point taken. Just find a saddle.'  
Yuuri nodded, resisting the urge to be childish and stick his tongue out this time, and led his horse back to its stable, leaving Victor to sweep up the hair he'd left behind. He leaned over the door for a second to watch Ice ripping the hay from his net before slouching away to the tack room to sort through Yuuko's assortment of saddles she used on the youngsters. There wasn't any point in getting a new one when there were so many not in use lying dusty in this room. He picked out a few that looked about the right fit, although he couldn't be too sure as they didn't usually bring in horses of this size. He settled a few on Ice's back, checking for tightness or looseness where it ought not to be. The first one was so low on the withers he couldn't get a single finger under it, let alone see light under the tree. He slung it back over the door and selected the next one, a jumping saddle that was probably older than him. It was far too tight under the knee roll and he grimaced, finding each and every one to be too small.   
  'Victor!' He called down the yard, knowing he had more saddles than would be needed to supply a saddlery. 'Can't find a saddle.'  
  'Take one of mine. I don't know if any will fit that fa- your horse.'  
Yuuri returned to the tack room and investigated the wall reserved for Victor's plethora of equipment. He found the widest, longest one he could and wondered why on earth Victor would own something so big when he'd probably never ridden a horse of that size in his life. He slung it up onto Ice's back and was both relieved and astounded to see that it fitted pretty well. A saddle pad underneath would go a long way, but Victor's saddles were remarkably well-kept and they were so comfortable it was hard not to slip into an armchair position. Victor had bought him his own saddle and now that he'd felt that sort of money under his ass he didn't think he could ever go back. This was why he was so glad he'd found a correctly fitting saddle that belonged to his boyfriend. He fastened the girth, barely able to stretch it to the first hole, and measured the stirrups to his length. Once satisfied, he pulled the saddle off and stuck it back on its rack ready for when he finally got to ride. In the tack room he met Victor, who was polishing one of his bridles.   
  'Is it even dirty?' Yuuri peered at it, running a finger along the noseband. It came away greasy from the oil.   
  'No, but I think it will fit Ice, so I'm going over it a bit.'  
  'Oh. Hey, I found a saddle. That one over there.' Yuuri pointed to where the saddle was rested back on its rack. 'Why do you have such a big one?'  
'Uhh, that's not mine. One of Jakov's old ones that he gave me, I guess.'  
  'He rode big horses?'  
  'Sure.'  
Yuuri sat on a tack box and observed Victor's ministrations on the bridle, finding his methodical motions strangely satisfying and soothing. He'd never before met somebody as obsessed with tack cleaning as this man was. He cleaned his tack after every ride and Yuuri had often seen him cleaning tack for a second time an hour later because he was dissatisfied with the original work. He supposed there was something calming about it, and he personally did the same with mucking out and sweeping the yard. The hard work and resulting cleanliness was hugely therapeutic for him and working with horses in general had done wonders for his anxiety- he'd had to learn to be brave so that he didn't pass those nerves onto his horses. Sure, he still had the odd panic attack and he couldn't claim to be anywhere near normal levels of anxiety, but he got by well enough. He'd learnt to deal with it. He also had Victor to help him, like that time in Madrid. He'd actually forgotten all about that in light of his win, which was odd as usually he focussed entirely on what went wrong rather than the positives. Thinking about how kind Victor had been to him, even going so far as to rescind his own entry, made him feel stupidly sentimental and all previous irritations over Victor's teasing of Ice were forgotten. His bad books became blank again. 

 

Ice's appearance had been shocking, but nobody had foreseen that there could possibly be something more shocking. The surprise came when Yuuri finally mounted the horse and was immediately almost taken off with when he barely even had his feet in the stirrups.   
'Shit!' He helped as Ice launched forwards the second he put his leg on, almost decking it. He clung onto the pommel and took his leg off entirely as he always did when he panicked. Victor looked even more astonished than he felt. He was gawping open-mouthed at the fact that this horse could actually move faster than a snail's pace.   
'Go for a trot,' Victor ordered, a thoughtful frown clouding his expression.   
Yuuri picked up a trot far too easily, barely brushing his leg within a millimetre's distance of Ice's flanks. His trot was so unbalanced it was like trying to steer a bull using telepathy and Yuuri found he had a pronounced leaning towards the left no matter how he was positioned. He circled on the right rein and still Ice leaned heavily on his left rein.   
'Just get used to him a bit,' Was Victor's only answer to this problem. Yuuri knew it would be ambitious to expect anything good at such an early point, but he could now see that this was going to take much more work than he was at that point predisposed to put in when he already had so much to do with Longines and Eros. He had also promised to take Yuri to another event at some point as Victor had refused to take him to any events.   
He worked Ice through in trot for a while, maintaining a more consistent contact but getting nowhere near an outline, before he hazarded a little canter. The transition was backwards and clumsy, resulting in a disunited canter and then an incorrect lead. Yuuri dropped back to trot and tried the same thing again, this time with a little more power in his legs and was rewarded with a jump into a fast and uncontrolled canter. He could barely sit to it, it was so uncomfortable and undeveloped. He concentrated as hard as he could on finding a rhythm but it was hard to keep one when every few strides Ice would either break to trot or speed up due to lack of balance.   
'He's... Very green,' Yuuri observed when he turned in after fifteen minutes, not wanting to place too much strain on a horse that had so recently travelled such a distance and was in an unfamiliar place.   
'We can work on that. I'll give you some credit; he's a lot more energetic than I assumed,' Victor agreed and rubbed Ice's nose, having warmed up to the brute a little over the past few days. 'I mean, he's probably just fresh. He hasn't been ridden in what, a month? I'll lunge him for you later and you can get back on after Monaco and see how he is. We can ask Yuuko to lunge him until then.'  
'I can lunge him myself today, you know.'  
'Sure, but you've got stables to do and another horse to ride.'   
Yuuri grimaced at the reminder, having forgotten his promise to do extra work around the yard for Yuuko in return for a reduced keep on the latest addition to his horse arsenal. In the face of the excitement that came with a new horse he'd also forgotten that they were setting off for Monaco early the next morning. He wasn't too worried about his own ride- he and Eros were actually getting on swimmingly for the moment, probably due to Yuuri's burst in confidence thanks to his win at Shanghai. What had happened in Hamburg he put purely down to worry for his boyfriend and Makkachin who, thank the heavens, was doing brilliantly and had been brought home. Fluffy, too, was much better. Yuri had brought her back into proper work but refused to jump her until they got to Monaco. She hadn't ended up coming to Cannes as the break hadn't been long enough to satisfy Yuri, but hopefully she'd be better in Monaco. The change of scenery ought to do her some good too. Now that she wasn't being ridden as regularly she'd become a complete bitch, at times launching across her stable if anybody dared to walk past just so she could snap at them. Yuuri wondered if Yuuko's insurance for the yard would go up since she was definitely an extreme hazard with those vicious teeth of hers that seemed to appear from anywhere. He'd fallen victim to their snapping many a time and as a result he refused to go anywhere near her end of the barn. Yuri was the only one who did anything for her these days- Yuuko was no longer brave enough to even hay her. She had demanded that Yuri do everything because she absolutely couldn't afford to injure herself anymore after developing a bad back from lugging around triplets.   
Whilst Agape was becoming angstier by the day, Eros had mellowed surprisingly since their return from Hamburg. He was getting longer turnouts now that the weather had improved and this had made a world of difference. He bucked less and his jump was becoming much cleaner, which was a huge bonus and even Victor was impressed with their progress. He didn't say it so much but Yuuri could tell from the way his eyes sparkled and he clasped his hands together and grinned whenever something went well. It made him inexplicably happy to see Victor smile genuinely for once, and it was happening so much more frequently. He himself was feeling mindlessly happy these days, and he was glad of it. They were making each other better people (for the most part) and never before had Yuuri been in such a pure relationship. They spent all their time together and yet they'd not once had a proper argument other than bickering over ridiculous things such as who took up the duvet (Victor was usually the culprit) and who had to get up to turn the light off. Yuuri had become adept at convincing Victor to do things after almost 5 months in a relationship. He honestly hadn't ever thought somebody could make him this happy- not Victor Nikiforov of all people, the person who he'd looked up to for years. It didn't feel real sometimes- it still didn't. What had he ever done to deserve such a wonderful person in his life? In fact, his entire life at that moment was completely as he wanted it. His career was beginning to look up, he and his horse were actually getting on, and he had the most perfect boyfriend in existence. His life was bloody brilliant and he wouldn't trade it for the world.


	20. Chapter 20

The few short hours before they were due to jump were more hectic than usual. Yuuri had managed to misplace his tie and was forced to borrow one of Victor's. He allowed Victor to tie it for him, rolling his eyes at how over-the-top he was being in the name of 'proper presentation', as if he wasn't just searching for an excuse to be flirtatious. What didn't help was Yuri constantly roping people into checking his horse over to ensure entirely she was feeling okay and he wasn't upsetting her in any way by riding her. They all knew it was a risky business to allow him to compete at such a high level with his usual regular training having been put on hiatus whilst Fluffy recuperated, but there was no doubt she was ready for it. The second she'd come out of her stable for a groom that morning she'd tried to kick Victor in the face, which was really the best that anyone could hope for. Now she was being led around the warmup ring by her increasingly antsy rider who was struggling to keep a hold of her reins as she reared up almost vertically.   
  'We should have gotten him a cob,' Jakov said in passing, his face all but growing new frown lines. Victor chuckled and Yuri shot him a furious glare that could probably be classed as a weapon of war. He'd worked on it, that was for sure.   
Yuuri was just mounting up after having walked the course, this time without the usual tremorous whimpers at each fence. He'd grown exponentially in confidence recently and Victor, too, had picked up on it. He'd been challenging him more but pushing him less so that he maintained independence in said confidence and learnt to trust his own judgement rather than have Victor yelling at him everything he needed to know, which had happened a lot. It was times like that when Yuuri remembered that Victor was inexperienced as a coach, but Jakov was always on hand to intercept and correct his methods. Still, Victor was always going to live vicariously through his students and he couldn't always hold his tongue quite as well as he might have liked.   
Yuuri wriggled his reins about a bit in an attempt to get Eros to round up a little more rather than sticking his nose above his ears and shaking it from side to side like a dizzy giraffe. He was too busy trying to sort that out to notice that he was about to walk right up the arse of a thick-set bay. It jumped sideways and it was Eros' violent reaction that woke Yuuri up as he began to plunge and careen about with a vengeance as if he'd been saving up for exactly this moment. He actually hadn't bucked in a few weeks and this was probably all of that bottled up stress coming out in one colossal burst. Yuuri very nearly bit the dust several times, and it was only thanks to Victor's insistence that he use a breastplate that he managed to maintain his seat and dignity. He eventually managed to yank Eros' head up and spin him in a tight circle before turning to apologise whoever he had decided to rear-end. He was about to apologise profusely but before he could get a word out of his mouth he noticed who the rider was.   
  'Phichit?'  
  'Yuuri! You've been ignoring my snapchats.' Phichit gave his friend a pointed look.   
  'I told you, I don't use my phone. Ever.'  
  'Too busy for me now that you have a boyfriend?'  
Yuuri's eyes flickered over to Victor quite of their own accord, betraying his feelings perfectly well for him. Victor was standing at the side of the arena talking to Cris, most likely about the best jodhpurs to show off their thighs.   
  'Hello?' Phichit poked him with his crop, a grin stretching across his face. 'I can't even talk to you without you going gooey-eyed.'   
  'Sorry.' Yuuri smiled back, his cheeks colouring. 'How've you been?'   
'Pretty good- Celestino may not be Victor Nikiforov but he's been helping me a lot. I can actually see a stride to an oxer now.'  
Phichit was infamous for his characteristic missing strides over oxers, resulting in a plethora of photos of him taking the 'Holy Shit Distance' with a face that was inevitably turned into a meme. Usually he made it into a meme himself.   
Yuuri thought back to when Celestino had coached him and how much of a mess he'd been at the end after losing Vicchan. He'd actually called recently to say how glad he was that Yuuri was back in the game and doing so well, which had been kind of him considering the unceremonious and highly unprofessional way Yuuri had dropped him almost without a moment's notice. He'd been a good coach, but less so when it came to Yuuri's anxious side. Victor, whilst perhaps lacking in explanation of what he was doing and thus briefly causing more anxiety, had been perfect in Madrid when Yuuri had entirely lost his nerve before the jumpoff. He was tactless, yes, but at least he was honest.   
  'Yuuri, are you going to ride today or just stand in the middle of the arena like a lemon?' Victor called across the ring, waving his whip vigorously and obliviously spooking half the horses in there. Yuuri snapped to attention and apologised to Phichit before pressing into an active walk and wriggling his fingers to gently persuade Eros into a contact. Eros wasn't best pleased at first and chucked his head about before settling onto the vertical and beginning to come from behind. Yuuri had actually had more problems with him going too round as opposed to Yuri's problem with Fluffy refusing to go anywhere near the vertical- the only vertical line in her contact was her head when she rammed it up as high as she could. Victor was insistent that it would come with time, but anybody could see that he didn't quite believe it when he said it. Yuuri had to admit it was slightly comical to watch them running through dressage tests now that Yuri had decided to try his hand at eventing. Victor had told him several times that he'd never get anywhere with his flatwork in the state that it was but Yuri was determined that he could win just by jumping. What he failed to realise was that it wasn't judged like showjumping; elegance was a massive part of it and going as fast as he could would be incriminating rather than beneficial. He had to present his test well and not underestimate it rather than just get it over and done with so he could jump if he wanted to succeed, and really the only way he'd be granted permission to continue with the sport was if he began to succeed. It sounded harsh but training under Jakov (as he still was when Victor wasn't ordering him around) meant Yuri had a certain level of expectation to meet and he'd known that when he'd entered into it. Victor had told Yuuri once about how Yuri had started out just mucking out stables every morning before school and all weekends, then graduated to grooming at a few shows until finally Victor had taken pity and bought him a horse. He'd also heard the story behind it that involved a broken rib, which apparently still amused Victor to no end but gave Yuri hell in cold weather, of which Russia had a lot. Thinking of Russia made Yuuri realise how brilliant the people who had recently joined his life were- Victor had dropped everything and possibly compromised his own success to come and coach him, then Yuri and Jakov had upped sticks and moved to a different continent instead of leaving him to his own madness. Jakov had been so willing to help him out even though he'd essentially been superseded by Victor and had left behind his dwindling number of pupils. Dwindling was a word Victor had used- he'd explained that Jakov had already been cutting down the number due to a failed marriage causing added concern and a doctor telling him if he didn't ease the stress out he'd have a heart attack within days. The poor man still had to deal with Victor's flamboyant ways and newfound love for coaching, though that was easily topped by the strides and turns Yuri took. He'd given so much of his time and life away just so Victor could chase after a random man he'd met once and follow his ridiculous dreams. For that, Yuuri was inexplicably grateful. He made a mental note there and then to thank Jakov profusely later on for everything he'd done. For now he had a horse to warm up, a course to ride and- touch wood- a jump-off to think about whilst he was in the ring. He gathered his reins up a little shorter and gave Eros the signal to pick up canter, which he did with unbridled eagerness and an added gleeful fly buck just to keep Yuuri on his toes. Yuuri rolled his eyes and just waited for the excited tugging to subside so that he could concentrate on instilling suppleness and obedience, or as much obedience as he could muster on a horse as headstrong as Eros. He narrowly missed cantering up Phichit's horse's arse for the second time and was forced to circle to gain control and give Eros a sharp telling off with his leg.   
  'Don't ignore me, you little shit,' He growled, half halting several times and dropping back to a boundlessly energetic trot. He kept the trot as he changed the rein, trying to keep his hands as elastic as possible so as not to commence a tug of war. He picked up canter again once he was on the other rein and this time he managed to keep it collected enough that he could perform a few basic manoeuvres for gathering impulsion and harnessing the energy beneath him. Once he was satisfied with his canter he aimed and fired at a jump and was rewarded with an overactive backend that threatened to do his back in one day. He gritted his teeth and softened his seat round to the next fence he jumped to preserve his back as best as he could. Eros noticed and gentled his shape this time, which threw Yuuri more than a midair buck ever would- was his horse actually being emotionally intelligent and empathetic for the first time in his life? Stranger things had never happened. He half-smiled with an odd affection; Eros was a complete and utter bastard, yes, but he was a loveable one. Yuuri hadn't noticed the kindling endearment that had crept up on him, but now he couldn't imagine his life without this stupid horse and he didn't really want to. He scratched Eros' withers and almost ripped out an entire plait, which got him a glare from Victor, who never missed a trick when it came to tack and turnout.   
'Yuuri Katsuki?' The ring steward called out, pronouncing everything wrong but giving it a good effort nonetheless. Yuuri tipped his head in thanks and trotted over to the tunnel, already able to hear the murmuring of the crowd beyond the barrier and to see the jumps waiting for him. He swallowed hard and checked his girth one last time before being ushered in as the barriers parted like the Red Sea. Eros bounced into his cadenced trot and begin to swing his head this way and that, taking in his surroundings and checking out the fences. Yuuri was doing the same thing, running through the course in his mind in anxiety as many times as he could before the bell rang. When it did, he put his leg on and felt Eros come up underneath him into a canter. He added his leg a little firmer than usual and was met with a tipping backwards of Eros' weight as he became feather soft in front and a powerhouse behind. Never before had Yuuri felt anything like it- he was so awestruck that he almost forgot he had to jump the first fence before he was eliminated for taking so long to get to it. Eros' jump was clean and neat, soaring over the first with plenty room to spare and yet still fast enough that they didn't waste precious seconds on air-time. The course itself wasn't hugely hard but the time allowed was tight and it was going to be a struggle to stay within it, even with Eros being as fast as he was. He kept the next fence clear in his view and Eros quickly locked on, his paces lengthening a little so that he could meet the striding that Yuuri had earlier envisioned. They hit the perfect spot and Yuuri couldn't stop a grin from spreading prematurely across his face. They were hitting each fence dead on with no mishaps with brakes or even bucks, which was unheard of for them. Eros was actually paying attention and Yuuri was brave enough to take control and push for the longer strides and collect sufficiently for the shorter ones. He got a clear round that felt so effortless he could have done it with his eyes closed and nothing beat the elation he felt when trotting out of the arena with the applause of the audience in the background. He met Victor just beyond the tunnel and he leaned across to hug him tightly, still beaming from ear to ear.   
'What even was that?' Victor muttered in his ear. 'Soon you won't even need me.'  
'I'll always need you!' Yuuri reassured him, too happy to worry about how godawful and overly serious he sounded. He sat back up and gave Eros another ecstatic pat, rubbing his sweaty neck and making him snort appreciatively.   
'You go get some water and I'll see you for the jump-off, okay?' Victor could easily make assumptive statements like this- there was never any doubt that he'd be getting into the jump-off. He actually had two rides, so he had twice the chance and knowing him he'd place first and second. That said, Yuri was looking to be a fierce contender as he attacked the jumps with a new vigour- attack was an apt word because he was definitely waging some kind of war with his delightful pony who was coming into every warmup fence either sideways or cat-leaping the entire way. Yuri's strides were worse than usual, which was saying something because his ability to see a stride was absolutely shocking. Still, Yuuri was over the moon to see the pair back together and going so well- Fluffy certainly seemed happy to be back, showcased by her inability to keep all four feet on the ground. After watching them with a stirring sense of pride for a while longer, Yuuri decided it was high time to get his horse watered and cooled down a bit before they next entered the ring. He took his feet out of the stirrups and loosened the reins as he plodded back to the temporary stable block, Where Jakov was ready and waiting with brimming water buckets. Eros didn't even wait for Yuuri to get off before he plunged his head into a bucket, bridle and all. Yuuri growled some choice words alongside ranting about rain-damage on his bridle but allowed him to drink his full. They were getting along so well that he couldn't bear to ruin things by triggering a tantrum, which Eros would undoubtedly have if his head was pulled away from the water. He eventually raised his head and flapped his lower lip liberally, showering water all over the floor and Jakov, who looked more weary by the minute.   
'How far along is the class?' He asked in his gruff voice.   
'Yuri's just about to go in if you wanted to watch.' Yuuri didn't even need to mention this really- Jakov always watched Yuri, and today was a pretty big day for him too. Jakov disappeared quickly and Yuuri mentally wished Yuri all the best from where he was. He waited a while until a few more people came back to hand his horse over to a groom so he could find Victor, who was undoubtedly stuck somewhere talking to someone, and they could walk the jump-off course together. He found him just walking back from his round, chatting excitedly to Cris again. His lips stopped moving and his eyes lit up when he saw Yuuri, causing Cris to roll his eyes dramatically and slink off to walk Toxxie round for a while before he went in.   
'Yuri got the fastest clear so far!' Victor informed Yuuri, dismounting and wrapping his boyfriend up in a spontaneous bear hug. 'So you and I are going to have to ride hard in the jump-off, okay?'  
'Don't you always?' Yuuri disentangled himself and raised an eyebrow. He got this exact note every single time he went into a jump-off.   
  "And have I ever missed out on that lap of honour?"  
  "Careful, you'll jinx it."  
  "Yuuri, I am not going to jinx it."   
  

  "I jinxed it," Victor grumbled as he trotted out of the arena after what was, to him, a disastrous round. He'd cocked up his stride to the third and as a result Aria had been too on the forehand to propel herself over it. She didn't stop- she was far too well-trained for that- but the rail had come crashing down and Victor had taken his first 4 faults in this league. Even the commentator had been momentarily speechless, the entire arena (or at least those who followed showjumping) dumbfounded. There had been an audible gasp- at least he'd made an impression on people. Still, it was annoying to have that on his record now; he could no longer say he'd placed at every leg of Longines since he'd started out in it. He had been the concurrent reigning champion for four years and he didn't intend to be losing that title any time soon- he would cling to it like Nick Clegg to his cabinet seat. Today wouldn't make a difference in the long run, but he'd miss being able to brag about his suspiciously clean record. He'd had a few near misses with bouncing poles and rather worrying rubbings from back legs, but this was the first hit.   
He couldn't be too dour about it for long, however, because Yuuri got a smart clear round with a bit of time to spare which cheered him up to no end, added to which two other people had poles down so he wasn't dead last. In fact, he would have ended up placing had Yuri not had such a brilliant round. He stood to the side watching, closing his eyes and praying for most of it because it seemed Yuri was in for the win, taking the most abysmal strides and almost crashing through half of them. He miraculously pulled it off and nabbed the top spot from JJ, which again rose Victor's spirits. Yuuri lay third after the jump-off ended and, for the first time, Victor was forced to watch the lap of honour and applaud other people rather than picking up his own rosette and posing for photos. He could at least live vicariously through his pupils, one of whom (and no prizes for guessing who) managed to get banished from the arena before the lap of honour for almost taking out a judge with an impressive cat-leap. Even for Fluffy it had been slightly excessive, and when followed by a rear so vertical it was a wonder they didn't go over, Victor was frankly shocked they'd even let him remain mounted. He watched Yuuri cantering (verging on an uncontrolled gallop) round the arena grinning and clinging to his rosette, pride settling in his heart and a little something extra. He pushed this aside and stepped back from the barrier to go and start tidying things up before their horses were shipped home the next day. He didn't know when he'd started thinking of Hasetsu as home, but he did now. To him, home wasn't a place, it was a feeling of belonging. Hasetsu was the first place he'd really and truly felt this and he intended to cling onto that for as long as he could.


End file.
